Allah ho Akbar...The first words that resonated through the city
of Nawabs. Only a part of it was awake by this hour. The streets, which as of
now could be mistaken for gullies, were barely filled with traffic and tyros
with an L mark on the rear and front glasses of cars made an avid scene. Tyros
who were mostly beauties stealing the serenity of the morning. Streets also
became a pathway for cyclists and skaters. One falls. One runs... One runs. One
flies. Amidst this platter of delicate off beat movements, the city was swiped
and washed. The brooms resembled the quid ditch game sticks but purposely they
were to fly off dust rather than human beings. The dust was accumulated at the
ends of the roads and the shredded leaves, the paan wrappers; chaat plates
among others were heaped up and burned. Modernization was taking its own pace
to reach here. The tropical climate kept the mornings cool for most part of the
year and chai shops were encircled with customers giving an extra flavour of
hope in the eyes of bhaiyaji, janaab, kaka, the common names for tea sellers.
“Ram Ram bhaiyaji”...
“Ram Ram bhaiyaji”...
”Salaam kaka”..
”Chutte nahi hain”
These phrases mingled with the conversation of morning walkers
just like milk and water in the boiling tea. To reveal a secret observation the
customers were mostly newspaper delivery boys who were back to duty after this
short retreat and thereafter the thump of newspaper delivery filled the air
with unison. The maids from the suburbs made their way to the colony, chased
and seldom barked upon by the street dogs. Their conversation continued unwary.
The daily work had made them accustomed to the streets as well as the dogs. The
puppies busied themselves chasing and disturbing the cows. Unnoticed, the sun
gradually took its high rise position raising the bar of temperature bit by
bit, warming the big heart of Lucknow. So everyone in this shehar had found a
means to keep himself happy and contented. The birds showed it by their never
ending ku-ku, the tress by their new green leaves, the school kids by the
unstoppable tolling of the bell and the Nawabs by their nazaakat, smiles and
generosity.
The gates of East road colony had opened and the maids made
inroads crossing the railway track which divided the slum and the colony. From
the chauraha they parted towards different blocks and it was understood without
saying that they would meet again after 2 hours. Latecomer would have to
arrange imli for free as a penalty for the breach of their verbal contract.
None wanted the other to be on time. Guddi entered the house of Mrs.K. It was
the last house to serve and clean but the only reason for her increased expense
on imlis. The delay, she attributed to the talks of Mrs.K and the morning astro
serial which was a compulsory watch for Mrs.K and Guddi.
“Didn’t I tell you Guddi to offer a bowl of pulse to a white
cow?”Mrs.K reminded Guddi of her alertness and astro wisdom.
“I remember Maalkin..but it would be too expensive for us.
”Guddi answered while sieving the rice.
“Hmmm...Then you can also offer a piece of sweet.”
“Maalkin...”Guddi said with a note of caution. This option had
the same restrictions as the first one.
“Hmmmmm...”said Mrs.K with a deep breath and continued,”then you
should just wait and watch how things turn out.”
Guddi remained silent as if indebted by what fate has brought
her. Her eyes were fixed on the rice plate.
“Let me check if there is any sweet in the kitchen.”Mrs.K made
her move.
Ohooo..The sound came from the kitchen.
“Kya hua Maalkin???Whats wrong??”
“The tap is still running and the aarti is lying unclean. I told
you to rub it with copper paste.”
“Ji maalkin.”Guddi replied in assurance. Mrs.K’s voice faded as
she moved towards the bedrooms to wake up the rest of the family.
“It’s such a big task to wake them up on holidays”.
“Guddi...Guddi..”
“Hmm...”Came a monotonous reply, in a tone of angst.
“Switch off the TV as you go
and...” after a pause she continued, “Switch on the water pump. I don’t
remember if I switched it or not.” Guddi listened to her Maalkins’ orders. She
was already late by 10 minutes, but who was to blame?
“Mannu, Channu get up beta...Its over 8.”
“Won’t you eat jalebis today?”
Mrs. K spoke aloud while shaking Mr.K. Her voice echoed loud,
pervading every worldly border. Mannu woke up with eyes half opened to see the
time on the square shaped clock. Time waits for none and neither do jalebis!
Come first, take first was the only rule. Being elder, it was Mannu’s duty to
fetch them from the market. Shedding off dizziness he woke up, deliberately
giving a little jolt to Channu. How could he have extra sleep? How was that
agreeable to Mannu? He went straight to the bathroom, readied himself up while
Channu enjoyed the moments of extra sleep. Mannu was a bit worried about the
scolding that was to follow from Mr. K. The house went by the rule that
holidays were meant to wake up early, finish the studies early and spend the
rest of the day as the heart said. But the promise had been broken today. Mannu
hurried up, dressed himself, took the money from the small box kept on the
refrigerator and he was off.
It was a bright and sunny morning. Holidays’ were mostly bright.
The marketplace in the E block had only two general stores. Cows basked in the
shades and the dogs ran and chased each other. Puppies sat near the counters in
want of some eatables and sometimes they were lucky. Most of the uncles and
auntie warmed themselves with the sunshine and with every encounter; direct or
indirect, Mannu bowed them with a Namaste. Tehzeeb, this was what the streets
taught.
The jalebi shop was surrounded with customers. Sale was at its
peak. The preparations were done on hybrid parameters. Big kadhais, more men
and a promise of better quality.
“Half kilogram pack uncle...”Mannu demanded, amidst the push and
rush, forwarding his skinny hand towards the counter, holding tight the Rs.100
note.
The half kilogram packet was handed over at once.
“Khulle, change...” The owner demanded with his eyes gazed on
placing the next order. Mannu did not have anything except that note. Without
asking Mannu, the owner increased the weight of the packet equivalent to Rs
100. Give the money and take your bag weighing the worth you paid! Jalebi was a
delicacy that the family enjoyed when it was crispy and hot. With the packet in
his hand, Mannu out casted everyone and halted in the kitchen. He was out of
breath, but hurried to bathe himself. Channu and Mr. K were still not ready.
Both the bathrooms were occupied. In a rush Mannu updated his day planner. Mrs.
K was waiting for the family to get ready while she continued with the astro
shows.
“Papa, can we go for an outing?”Mannu asked him while enjoying
jalebis, toasted bread slice and milk. It was after constant poking from Channu
that he was able to put up this question. It had been a long while since the
family had gone out. Mr. K was on leave. He had been ill due to weather change
and he extended the leave on the pretext of pursuing studies for promotion.
“Yes, you can, but ensure your safety.”
“What about studies?” Mr. K enquired while focussing on the
news. After a long search for selection of a news channel now his left hand was
busy adjusting the volume.
“We’ll complete them in the evening. The homework is complete.
All I need to do is give time to extra practice in...in Maths and chemistry...I
would...”These explanations of Mannu were interrupted by Mr. K.
“Ok Ok I got it...You may go.” Mr K permitted them. His focus
was still on the news.
“Go and get my wallet from the pants.” Mr. K ordered Mannu.
“Go bring it.” He ordered Channu. One. No. Two. No. Three. No.
Four. No. Five. Yes! Five hundred bucks was the ultimate amount he gave Mannu.
He stared at him in astonishment unable to cope up with this sense of
fulfilment. Channu stared at him, Mrs. K kept silent conveying contentment
through a smile.
“It’s too much. Have I to bring something for home?” Mannu
finally questioned to show courtesy even when he knew they were for personal
expense.
“You’re grown up now, you must know better.”He answered.
“If you gotta go then get ready soon beta.”Mrs. K said while
finishing off the last bite. Channu had already left.
Whenever the kids went out, especially on the bike, her eyes sparkled with the same emotion. It was, but more intense every other time. Come soon. Her eyes always meant. Go early and come early was her golden motherly saying. But how could they leave so early? What and how to wear was the biggest question.
Salwar suits??? No! Jeans??? No! Capri??? May be. Sneakers??? Comfortably. In these outfits, girls would be walking, wandering around the markets and food courts and how could they go just putting on any piece of fabricated thread? Oh no!!! Never.
Whenever the kids went out, especially on the bike, her eyes sparkled with the same emotion. It was, but more intense every other time. Come soon. Her eyes always meant. Go early and come early was her golden motherly saying. But how could they leave so early? What and how to wear was the biggest question.
Salwar suits??? No! Jeans??? No! Capri??? May be. Sneakers??? Comfortably. In these outfits, girls would be walking, wandering around the markets and food courts and how could they go just putting on any piece of fabricated thread? Oh no!!! Never.
Scrutinizing their wardrobe,
even after knowing what limited choice was available, Mannu came out with a new
combination. He wore a cheque shirt with shades of blue and a pair of black
jeans. Channu dressed himself in a black shirt, and a pair of blue jeans. With
the heavy wallet and keys of Discover-125c.c., they were ready to explore new
avenues, discover the shehar with the eyes of youth. They were to be the
Sultans of Lucknow!!!
Life gives everyone a chance to transcend himself from nothing
to something and finally from something to everything. It was their chance
today. Unseeing the neighbourhood beauties they went past right and left turns.
Everything, you get in life at the age of eighteen, if you have more than two
girls staring at you. Isn’t it? Somewhere in his heart Mannu knew that the girl
he’ll love was far away. But sometimes light hearted thoughts unknowingly
become a reality. Unseen, unheard, unknown, she was, but he knew that she was
somewhere underneath those white clouds and a day he’d surely find her. Finding
the perfect love was like a quest in his life. The sublime happiness of these
illusions reflected through the speed metric ways. Out breaking the silence
with the engine, out daring fanatically on two wheels they left the world
behind which seemed part transparent, part translucent from the helmet glass.
Uncles and aunts, shops and shopkeepers, friends and foes, everything and
everyone blurred at the speed of 40km/hr, sometimes 60 and sometimes even
80km/hr. Heads turned towards them as Mannu increased the speed further and
blew the horn, non-stop. Those girls who over looked him when he was on his
bicycle, gazed as if intoxicated.
The colony gate opened up at the national highway termed the
main road by the localites. It was flooded with high moving traffic. Scooters,
motorcycles, cars, rickshaws all traversed in multiple ways on the two way
lane. Someone kicking. Someone crossing. Someone turning and someone falling.
Mannu drove past, his eyes twinkling and searching for a ‘she’ vehicle. A
Scooty pep or a Kinetic. Rarely, he saw them very often. The mandir gates were
still open wide, the front street pedestrianized for worshippers. God has made
all the rules, so can’t he break one? He surely can and He did break all the
traffic rules on Sunday. The prasad, besmeared in smoke and dust was considered
pure and sold from the lane opposite the mandir adding quantity to the
criss-cross. Vehicles had to stop in front of the mandir to let the followers
cross. Cacophonies and cacophonies...Oh!!!One had to love them. God’s blessing
comes in numerous ways. It showed here by these sounds. Youth is restless and
as Mannu saw the slightest space he accelerated. Never did he look back. He had
two rear view mirrors you know.
The way to their destination went through the Ravivaar Bazaar.
Groceries, bakeries, fruits and vegetables, everything was available in one and
the same neighbourhood. An indigenous local mall as Mannu and Channu figured
out. Aroma from sweet shops; groundnut thellas, juice shops, incense sticks and
kebab’s alternated randomly as they crossed the bazaar. Pan shops were crowded
with young guys in school uniforms with white sticks in one hand a soft drink
in the other.
“Bunking classes just for a cigarette!!! Not good.” They both
brothers shouted. Sabji wala shouted loud in a unique fashion to make a sale.
Mrs. K had handed a small list of vegetables to be brought even after
resistance from Mannu. A flute vendor occupied a place near the perfume seller
and played his few learned rather best learned pieces. Kids, some on their
father’s back, some hanging away from their mother’s fore arms shouted amidst
their cries for a purchase. Mother’s hate tears, so do father’s. This helped
the flute vendor to earn his expense. Probably, his children cried at home too.
Big banners advertising their shop and the special Sunday sale, hung from the
skies. Their half torn cloth and fluttering threads, still did the job of
attracting customers. Since the birth of Homo sapiens they have always wanted
much more than they do or give or pay. And some proof could be found after
seeing the on moving, restless crowd and in the bazaar. Truly, man will never
change.
Wheeling past this perplexed scenario, they were welcomed by the
cantonment area. Four way lanes for the two way traffic, sign boards for turns,
speed breakers, zebra crossing, traffic lights and traffic police. Trees on
streets, people on legs and drivers on wheels. Everything was adorably
immaculate! The streets were named after martyrs of regiments as a tribute for
their sacrifices. No street dog or swine was seen running around. The streets
only welcomed Pugs and Dobar mans.
“I guess these dogs have
separate bathrooms too!”Mannu spoke. Channu giggled and again busied himself in
the scenic view of the area. Houses were housed by trees and S.U.V.’s. Tata’s,
Mahindra’s and Ford’s with their sahib exit from the same gates. High ranked
defence officials had their houses on the sides of the street. They both stood
on the foot-rest of the bike to see inside those kothis, bungalows, but what
they never saw was ever they wanted to. Flowing speedily through these ditch
free roads for about three and a half minutes, they reached the heart of the
city, Hazratganj. They say...
“Yahan Nawabon ka dil basta hai...”
“Yahan Nawabon ka dil basta hai...”
Lucknow has been filmed in several bollywood movies. The
chauraha still served as the edifice of culture and historicity. Although
development had swiped the ancient texture but the strange enigma about the
place remained diluted in the local air. The kashmiri chai had been replaced by
plush coffee shops. The idea of romance had changed a bit. It was the same area
where Mr. K had spent his days of youth, sipping chai on the open streets. He
had familiarised both the boys about the beauty of those days. He would say as
if in disgust...”Ab wo baat nahi rahi...hamara zamaana hi kuch aur tha.”
Change is but eternal. Time changes and we with time.
Architectural and constructional changes were few in this part of the city.
Preservation was more important here. What changed here very often was the
preparation of sweets. Desi ghee replaced oil. Also the change was just for the
sake of advertisement, for increased sale. Other were minor changes in
commodities of daily consumption including the ingredients and essence of
gulkand which were enriched, the masala of the kebab, the texture of the
tandoori preparation, the craftsmanship among the chikan fabric weavers, the
chadhava at the Hanuman mandir. And price change was universal.
A kid when becomes a boy changes his field of experimenting and
when one drove from gullies to the main roads; experimenting with the wheel and
speed was obvious. Wasn’t it?
“Does it ever turn green, bhaiya?” Channu asked his elder
brother, seeing the long queue of traffic halted before the red light.
“Surely it does, but only when we are kilometres away.” Mannu
said and they smiled together. The air was pleasant and the sunshine soft. But
something that troubled Mannu was the traffic police. It created confusion as
the booth wasn’t visible. It was getting hard to find out where and when to
move.
“Channu..do you see the policemen...or the signal?”Mannu asked
Channu overpowered with confusion. Sweat had started dripping his face. A quick
yes from Channu could have served as a relief.
“No...wait”He replied standing tall on the footrest.
”Yaaa I see him...He’s busy with the other lane.”
“You get ready now...”Channu spoke with a short pat on Mannu’s
shoulders as he seated himself.
“In this crowd you’re just another sheep. Move when the other’s
move.”
Mannu comforted himself in soliloquy. The confirmation of a wait relaxed Mannu and he started scrutinizing cars, scooters for beauties and the shops beyond them. Someone with a kebab parantha! Someone with a dahi-bada!of the famous Kinare wali dukaan and Someone with a kulfi! Yummy!!!
Pawwww....Paaawwww....
Mannu comforted himself in soliloquy. The confirmation of a wait relaxed Mannu and he started scrutinizing cars, scooters for beauties and the shops beyond them. Someone with a kebab parantha! Someone with a dahi-bada!of the famous Kinare wali dukaan and Someone with a kulfi! Yummy!!!
Pawwww....Paaawwww....
“Traffic signal opens.”Channu shouted and urged Mannu to move
unknowingly pushing the him at the back. The jerk showed nervousness that
rested in their minds.
Ist gear. Accelerator. Engine-off.
“Oh God !” Mannu exclaimed. It was this moment of urgency which
was the fear of Mr. K. and this made him conscious about the bike journey.
Pawwww....Paaawwww....Pawwww.... and the others shouted. Mannu kicked for the
third time and the bike eventually started. He accelerated and they crossed the
green light when it was almost red again. The sunshine returned back to its
softness.
It was after a long break that the brothers were able to
befriend freedom. The routine of the school and extra classes had taken
complete control over their lives. Also the definition of freedom had changed.
In the younger days it meant a casual race in the nearby park or a rooftop
cricket match. Options then were limited and means to cherish them were found
easily. Now life was showing a change.
Hazratganj and a holiday was a fine combination for people in
Lucknow. Customers stood in textile shops like dummies advertising a fine
clothing piece. Couples dated on the other side of the road in Cafe Coffee Day.
Mannu wondered when would his day come? Book-sellers sold books, cobbler’s
polished shoes, others displayed hoods, but they just moved. From Van Heusen to
Ray Ban. From Peter-England to Woodland, the place had exclusive showrooms and
their parking space was hovered by Honda’s and Ford’s. But what was the refuge
for those who couldn’t afford Ford’s? Love-lane was the destination for those
who were abstinent to brands and at times for those who didn’t find a parking
space. Channu pointed his fore-finger towards some free space. A pot bellied
man on a black Pulsar-200cc envied their Discover as they paid chotu the
parking fees and went off.
“He was staring at you bhaiya, staring in anger.” Channu
whispered with his palm on Mannu’s opposite shoulder.
“That’s why I didn’t even look at him.” Mannu said with an
attitude which displayed the wisdom of being elderly, paused for a while and
said again...
“Remember one thing Channu...A
wise man does his job and let the others do theirs.” Channu nodded his head in
agreement and they continued moving until they were encountered by a chashmewala.
Goggles in his hands, goggles on his shirt collar, goggles in his shirt
pockets, goggles on his waist, and goggles in his pant pockets. Two on his
forehead and two on his ears. Ever saw a businessman like this? NO???Love lane
could be the right place of visit.
Channu was fond of goggles.
“Can we know your name please?”Channu asked.
“What will you do with that nawab sahib?” he said in Hindi with a coy smile on his frayed dark lips.
“We don’t want to buy one.” Mannu said assertively to save his official time and moved on. He followed them as if they were the only customers and just repeated...“Ok don’t buy, just have a look sahib, just see.”
“I told you we don’t need it, don’t you understand?” Mannu said amidst shouts and Channu just repeated in assurance. They had to act rude, act like sahibs and finally he left.
“Can we know your name please?”Channu asked.
“What will you do with that nawab sahib?” he said in Hindi with a coy smile on his frayed dark lips.
“We don’t want to buy one.” Mannu said assertively to save his official time and moved on. He followed them as if they were the only customers and just repeated...“Ok don’t buy, just have a look sahib, just see.”
“I told you we don’t need it, don’t you understand?” Mannu said amidst shouts and Channu just repeated in assurance. They had to act rude, act like sahibs and finally he left.
As one moved past one could see a bike spring out from a gulli
and a scooter spring in; every now and then from the demo version of the
chaurahas. This was their third encounter with this hop in hop out trail of two
wheelers, but the most fascinating one. She looked pretty in a salwar kurta and
her long tail of black hairs, just like they show in advertisements, shone
bright. Her locks twinkled in the sunshine. She had to cross Mannu, but how
could he cross her? Channu stood numb behind him. The springing two wheelers
would have crossed kilometres by now but she stood there. Somehow she managed
to cross them.
“Sorry.” Mannu said for no genuine reason. She said nothing, locked her ripple behind the ear and went watching her each step closely.
“Ain’t it a hot day bhaiya?”Channu questioned.
“Ya, very hot and these walking lanes just intensify the heat.”Mannu said amidst his smiles and they moved past cracking this adolescent joke.
“Sorry.” Mannu said for no genuine reason. She said nothing, locked her ripple behind the ear and went watching her each step closely.
“Ain’t it a hot day bhaiya?”Channu questioned.
“Ya, very hot and these walking lanes just intensify the heat.”Mannu said amidst his smiles and they moved past cracking this adolescent joke.
“Why are we here by the way?”Channu questioned.
“For fun, what else. Are you feeling hungry? We just had breakfast.” Mannu replied.
“Not much hungry but the walk is boring me...I want to sit.”
“I’ll go and bring lemonade for you.”Mannu went ahead and purchased a glass of it.
“Do you remember the second law of thermodynamics?”Channu enquired. He was a year younger to Mannu.
“Yes I do.”Mannu replied recalling the law. He had performed well in physics in the previous class. But this was the year of real test as the class 12th examinations were close.
“I have a test tomorrow. It feels so relaxing to discuss it here. Wish I could bring my notes.”Channu replied.
“I feel if we could read Ghalib here...Dil-e-naadan tujhe hua kya hai? Aakhir is dard ki dawa kya hai?” Mannu recited these lines. Channu listened with a dreamy look in his eyes which were fixed towards the sky.
“Did you like it?”Mannu asked Channu sipping the lemonade. He was feeling glad that he had memorized some good shayri.
“Hmmm Hmmm..it was good..good” Channu replied with a sense of confusion.
“Repeat it then” Mannu asked him completely sure that he would not hear the lines back.
“O give me the lemonade... How could I learn it in one go?”Channu replied in disgust.
With a laugh Mannu said ‘’Got you Bhai. You still prefer thermodynamics, right?”
“The second and the most basic law is that energy of an isolated system is conserved” replied Mannu confidently.
“I would like to correct you; it’s not the second but the first law which you still remember by heart” came the casual answer.
“Yea..Whatever it is but you should better learn that energy remains conserved is the thing that will help you, not the facts and figures”.
“The lemonade tasted good anyhow” was a blunt reply from Channu which instantly killed the argument.
“For fun, what else. Are you feeling hungry? We just had breakfast.” Mannu replied.
“Not much hungry but the walk is boring me...I want to sit.”
“I’ll go and bring lemonade for you.”Mannu went ahead and purchased a glass of it.
“Do you remember the second law of thermodynamics?”Channu enquired. He was a year younger to Mannu.
“Yes I do.”Mannu replied recalling the law. He had performed well in physics in the previous class. But this was the year of real test as the class 12th examinations were close.
“I have a test tomorrow. It feels so relaxing to discuss it here. Wish I could bring my notes.”Channu replied.
“I feel if we could read Ghalib here...Dil-e-naadan tujhe hua kya hai? Aakhir is dard ki dawa kya hai?” Mannu recited these lines. Channu listened with a dreamy look in his eyes which were fixed towards the sky.
“Did you like it?”Mannu asked Channu sipping the lemonade. He was feeling glad that he had memorized some good shayri.
“Hmmm Hmmm..it was good..good” Channu replied with a sense of confusion.
“Repeat it then” Mannu asked him completely sure that he would not hear the lines back.
“O give me the lemonade... How could I learn it in one go?”Channu replied in disgust.
With a laugh Mannu said ‘’Got you Bhai. You still prefer thermodynamics, right?”
“The second and the most basic law is that energy of an isolated system is conserved” replied Mannu confidently.
“I would like to correct you; it’s not the second but the first law which you still remember by heart” came the casual answer.
“Yea..Whatever it is but you should better learn that energy remains conserved is the thing that will help you, not the facts and figures”.
“The lemonade tasted good anyhow” was a blunt reply from Channu which instantly killed the argument.
An hour had passed in the heart
of the sheher. Both the brothers were sharing lessons with each other. The
matinee show in a nearby cinema hall was over and a mesmeric crowd overwhelmed
the street shops with orders. The chit chatter became loud enough for both of
them to make a move. The usual time for lunch had passed. On holidays the lunch
at home usually consisted of a bowl of salad which Mr K garnished himself
served with hot rice and steaming daal and special chutney of coriander and
garlic. Chapatis were avoided. It also gave quite a rest to Mrs K. The boys
here had a plethora of choice to break the monotony. Although they relished the
home preparations, but the spice in eating at Hazratganj was any day an
overzealous affair. Both had a common choice of Pizzas but Mannu was more
partial.
Dominos Pizza is just a delight when you have more bucks than
you really need. Mannu was really fond of pizza so they moved in. Good
furniture. Good lighting. Good waiters. Overall a good ambience. Oh!!!how can
one forget? Good money too.
“Kebab-do-pyaza, small.” Mannu ordered.
“Cheese with barbeque chicken, small” Channu ordered.
“14 minutes, sir.” The waiter replied. A strange answer, isn’t it?
“They’ve mugged up some words and they spill it on the table.” Channu said strongly as if he resisted this hackneyed attitude.
“This is a sign of better service, just enjoy yaar.” Mannu said to reconcile and to bubble equanimity on his conscious.
“Kebab-do-pyaza, small.” Mannu ordered.
“Cheese with barbeque chicken, small” Channu ordered.
“14 minutes, sir.” The waiter replied. A strange answer, isn’t it?
“They’ve mugged up some words and they spill it on the table.” Channu said strongly as if he resisted this hackneyed attitude.
“This is a sign of better service, just enjoy yaar.” Mannu said to reconcile and to bubble equanimity on his conscious.
A playlist of rock and roll music was the perfect remedy to make
those fourteen minutes span shorter with beats rolling from Pink Floyd to Queen
to Scorpions to Dire Straits and many more artists. Before the expected time
the order was delivered on table.
“Mmmm its delicious. I wish mummy learns the recipe.”Mannu said, his mouth overdressed with cheese.
“Hmmm...but we need an oven for that.”Channu replied.
“I know. Well, then it’s better to come here. It was a good treat although.” Mannu said interrogatively.
“You ought to like it when you pay that much.”Channu replied and Mannu couldn’t find words to dominate him this time. Actually, what he said was true. They left the outlet, bowed in front of the Hanuman mandir and continued moving. Its gates were closed, still God heard the prayers. Didn’t he? If one really wanted to enjoy Hazratganj, know it like one knows oneself, it was possible by being on the move. This place had an open heart. Nothing needed to be stopped over much to let its beauty reach one’s heart. And it gave pleasure, an enjoyable numbness in the feet as a sign of remembrance of this visit to Hazratganj. Take a bowl of anything you love to lick, kulfi or a softy and just carry on. But they were left with Rs.227.50. It was all Mannu found after checking every single pocket of his wallet. The possibility of buying any bowl of any shape was zero. So they moved on singing love songs to fulfil their appetite.
“Mmmm its delicious. I wish mummy learns the recipe.”Mannu said, his mouth overdressed with cheese.
“Hmmm...but we need an oven for that.”Channu replied.
“I know. Well, then it’s better to come here. It was a good treat although.” Mannu said interrogatively.
“You ought to like it when you pay that much.”Channu replied and Mannu couldn’t find words to dominate him this time. Actually, what he said was true. They left the outlet, bowed in front of the Hanuman mandir and continued moving. Its gates were closed, still God heard the prayers. Didn’t he? If one really wanted to enjoy Hazratganj, know it like one knows oneself, it was possible by being on the move. This place had an open heart. Nothing needed to be stopped over much to let its beauty reach one’s heart. And it gave pleasure, an enjoyable numbness in the feet as a sign of remembrance of this visit to Hazratganj. Take a bowl of anything you love to lick, kulfi or a softy and just carry on. But they were left with Rs.227.50. It was all Mannu found after checking every single pocket of his wallet. The possibility of buying any bowl of any shape was zero. So they moved on singing love songs to fulfil their appetite.
“Bhaiya, why don’t we get something for papa?”Channu stopped
Mannu, pointing towards a Raymond showroom.
“But why? Mom will be angry if we return with no money. And what do you expect to buy with this little amount?”Mannu asked unable to take a decision to move in.
“Don’t worry, we’ll see to it then.” Channu entered the showroom and Mannu forcibly accompanied him. For half an hour they searched for apparels that amounted to Rs.225, a maximum of Rs.226. They found some neckties, but according to Mannu the standard was poor. Money can never stop you from thinking big and selecting good. It can only change the owner of the commodity. So, their search continued. Finally they found a black silk tie with white pearls. M.R.P Rs.675.
“But why? Mom will be angry if we return with no money. And what do you expect to buy with this little amount?”Mannu asked unable to take a decision to move in.
“Don’t worry, we’ll see to it then.” Channu entered the showroom and Mannu forcibly accompanied him. For half an hour they searched for apparels that amounted to Rs.225, a maximum of Rs.226. They found some neckties, but according to Mannu the standard was poor. Money can never stop you from thinking big and selecting good. It can only change the owner of the commodity. So, their search continued. Finally they found a black silk tie with white pearls. M.R.P Rs.675.
“Let’s move.” They said to each other in unanimity. Money stood
in between sons and father. Money! Mannu dreamt of gifting Mr. K clothing from
Italian designers, the one he had read about in magazines, but here he stood
empty handed with little over Rs.200 in his shirt pocket. They both were upset
a bit until they heard laughs of girls who walked towards them.
“Girls always laugh on the slightest of phrase they say or share”. Mannu shared this piece of wisdom acquired from youth. Channu looked away and allowed his brother the privilege of seeing those local girls, a token of respect.
“Let’s move Channu, its getting dark.” Mannu said to him as those girls moved past.
“Not probably because it is dark, but we’ve to study.Um.. So let’s go back. Should I drive?”Channu asked hesitantly while he wrapped his face with a handkerchief.
“Not now” was the usual reply.
“Girls always laugh on the slightest of phrase they say or share”. Mannu shared this piece of wisdom acquired from youth. Channu looked away and allowed his brother the privilege of seeing those local girls, a token of respect.
“Let’s move Channu, its getting dark.” Mannu said to him as those girls moved past.
“Not probably because it is dark, but we’ve to study.Um.. So let’s go back. Should I drive?”Channu asked hesitantly while he wrapped his face with a handkerchief.
“Not now” was the usual reply.
Walking that one kilometre back
in a hurry they rarely noticed anything except the new, big cars as they halted
on the red light. See big to get big. This was what Mr. K taught them. Mannu
couldn’t make out what he saw was really big or not. Thinking, seeing and
walking they reached the parking space. Kick. 1st gear. Accelerator and they
were off. This time Mannu saw only the number plates of the moving scooters,
cars and bikes as they passed them. Channu did observe something but silently.
There was no talking. It was four when they reached home. Front tyre puncture
stole their forty five minutes and fifty five rupees.
Sometimes, strangers gift us those moments of happiness, which
even the dearest fail to purchase. A scrap from an unknown user around 9:30
p.m. was the latest reason for smile on Mannu’s face, a dimple on his right
cheek corroborating his happiness.
“I feel sorry for you...please take care...”3 minutes ago.
It was the only scrap for the day and from a person who was stranger to Mannu in a strange way. He had seen this photo and name in a profile, but he could not figure out where. He punched his lips, pressed them hard against each, and punched them again for remembrances. All he could find about her was after clicking that profile photo.
“I feel sorry for you...please take care...”3 minutes ago.
It was the only scrap for the day and from a person who was stranger to Mannu in a strange way. He had seen this photo and name in a profile, but he could not figure out where. He punched his lips, pressed them hard against each, and punched them again for remembrances. All he could find about her was after clicking that profile photo.
As far as he could percept from his new found hobby of chatting,
it was her real profile photo. Scarf on her hairs, a green coloured outfit,
locks of hairs hanging on her shoulders and a smile which conveyed happiness.
Pia, female, single, Jaipur/Mumbai. With a scroll down he got the name of their
mutual friend. Avi, it read. Avi and Mannu had some casual likings for each
other till yesterday, but today the winds flowed in departing directions. The
breaking off was a result of a clear misunderstanding. The classmates in a show
of fancy didn’t give Mannu time enough to explain himself. Neither the girls allowed
Avi to talk to Mannu. The confusion grew stronger. Avi wanted Mannu to attend
classes but he was usually bunking every other class, though present in the
English lecture. He bunked to fulfil his fondness for poetry. But this was
interpreted by Avi in a strange way. She couldn’t tolerate Mannu’s affair with
poems. And one day in a fit of outrage, prompted by the group she spent the day
with, she complained to the Principal and Mannu was punished for bunking
classes. It was harsh. He was made to sit out during the English lecture for
whole one week. It was enough to break the hearts which were still not one.
They ended up in an annoying way.
But did it annoy Pia too? How does she know me? Does she know
about...? Mrs. K’s calling blocked his thoughts till full stops and question
marks. It was quarter to ten as the square clock above his head showed. His
mind ticked faster than the clock needles in search of a reply. It had to be
beautiful and poetic, for it was a scrap to a girl. Think, think and think....
“I’m fine...it’s all a part of one’s life. You too take good care...”Mannu replied. It was backspace that he pressed more than any other character on the keyboard.
“I’m fine...it’s all a part of one’s life. You too take good care...”Mannu replied. It was backspace that he pressed more than any other character on the keyboard.
At 10p.m. the family was ready to dine. Mannu did not care about
what was being served tonight, his thoughts were just circling about his new
friend, Pia. Looking up and down, left and right he just whispered that name,
Pia. He found it absolutely fascinating the third time he whispered it to
himself. He ate spoons of something that tasted like biryani, but that didn’t
fill his appetite. The TV characters spoke their monotonous dialogues, Mrs. K
and Channu shared some servings. Mr. K was still not home so after a long wait
dinner had to be served. Mannu was busy answering his own questions.
Did it annoy Pia too?
Why did she send a scrap to me?
Why? Alas! He couldn’t fill those unanswered blanks and finally encountered a stop on his thoughts and food.
Did it annoy Pia too?
Why did she send a scrap to me?
Why? Alas! He couldn’t fill those unanswered blanks and finally encountered a stop on his thoughts and food.
“Do you need more Mannu?”
“Did you like it?”
“I knew you would like it. Doesn’t it taste better than that expensive pizza?” Mrs. K questioned all in one go. As soon as you finish the last spoon, a true Indian mother is ready to serve you again at that very moment. Isn’t it?
“No...No...Mummy...I’ve overeaten.”Mannu replied.
“Have some more, please.”She replied. Mannu’s silence gave her a positive answer. Somehow, he managed to glib it all and in moments he was at the study table. Mr. K had not arrived yet.
“Did you like it?”
“I knew you would like it. Doesn’t it taste better than that expensive pizza?” Mrs. K questioned all in one go. As soon as you finish the last spoon, a true Indian mother is ready to serve you again at that very moment. Isn’t it?
“No...No...Mummy...I’ve overeaten.”Mannu replied.
“Have some more, please.”She replied. Mannu’s silence gave her a positive answer. Somehow, he managed to glib it all and in moments he was at the study table. Mr. K had not arrived yet.
Mannu opened the chemistry book
in his ataxic state, but second thoughts were imperative. It was the first time
in those two years of studying Chemistry when he saw the perspicuous nature of
carbon. We all are different forms of carbon that have evolved, but from the
same origin.
I guess this was why Pia had scraped me. He said in soliloquy. He couldn’t bear empty answers any more. Book closed. Lamps off! Good night.
I guess this was why Pia had scraped me. He said in soliloquy. He couldn’t bear empty answers any more. Book closed. Lamps off! Good night.
It was two minutes to seven and Mannu was still on his bicycle,
racing against time to catch the school bus. It is in these paced moments that
you realise the importance of an alarm. He cursed himself for the last night
carelessness as sweat rolled into his eyes. At one minute past seven the school
bus would leave. He hurried, stood on the pedals to roll the tyre faster and
finally halted on the stop at one minute past seven.
The bus has gone. No, it hasn’t.
He repeated this phrase to reconcile his conscious.
Sweepers cleaned the streets; waste was heaped and burned as
usual. Smoke rose and entered his nostrils, his mouth. Students, in blue, red
and grey uniforms waited for their buses. Some arrived at the nearby petrol
pump for a refill in their scooters and bikes. But why was Mannu standing here?
Was he really waiting for the bus or had it left already after waiting long for
him? Again he used his illusions to reach a positive outcome. He repositioned
the bag as his thighs were getting hot by the lunch box in it. Mrs. K never
failed to prepare it and keep it in. It was four minutes past seven when he
heard a horn that seemed familiar. Standing on tow tips; covered by the black
shoes he started uncovering the roof tops of the buses and trucks that passed.
But none of them ended the wait. His feet had started quaking and every hope
shuddered as he rested on the shoe heels. He was already missing the English
class and missing the school altogether would add to an extended period of
punishment. An air of chaos crept up in his life.
But life always gives a second chance. The next moment he looked
up, the bus was there. He comforted himself with a deep breath. Girls waved him
amid their smiles from behind the transparent window glasses. How could he
resist a smile? He jumped to climb in. Smiling and waving, tumbling due to the
inertial forces, he ultimately landed on the last seat. It was his favorite.
There was no objection on opening the window pane. Just open it and sense the
muddled morning breeze! It’s bliss. Peeping out one could get a vague taste of
every breakfast dish including the samosas and jalebis. Life seems so beautiful
with a zephyr blowing the hairs and with those unopened eyes one tries to
imagine the whole world. But beautiful moments are ephemeral.
“Hey!!! Completed your physics assignment, Mannu?”Vivi
questioned.
“Hey!!! Which assignment are you talking about? And why did the
bus get late today?”Mannu questioned back with his head still out of the
window.
“There were five questions on electromagnetism. Sir told that
you would get five marks extra even if you copy answer 2 for question 1.”Vivi
narrated this whole scenario and pulled Mannu by his shoulder.
“Only one mark for the full page you write in six to seven
minutes!”Mannu exclaimed positioning his spectacles.
“A waste of time, isn’t it Vivi?” The bus as usual smelled of
rubber and diesel. Mannu never knew that some questions had no answers.
Disgusted by Mannu’s words, Vivi left the seat and went away in search of
another one. But his body, basically his stomach was claustrophobic. His belly
needed room. He could only fit on the last seat. The pimples on his circular
face were filled with blood when he found no seat empty and had to return to
the last one again. Mannu laughed, giggled and he kept quiet, trying hard to
avoid a contact. Probably everyone in the bus laughed at him. His fatness
always subjected him to mockery.
“They always laugh at me. How much do they know me?” Vivi spoke
with no clear listener for his words. The question was but directed towards
Mannu. Mannu smiled and hugged him.
”Give me the questions Vivi.”
“I’ll do them if you insist.”Mannu said again.
“Come on, hurry up.”Mannu ordered shaking him by his shoulders.
Sometimes, he acted just like Mrs. K. He said everything in one go.
“We’re already late and I guess we’ll reach the school in ten
minutes.”Vivi answered looking at his wrist, then my face and then his wrist
again. Mannu saw the seeds of friendship growing again in his eyes.
“If you give it to me now, I’ll complete it in 9 minutes and 59
seconds.”Mannu said smilingly just to equanimize him. Correct words at the
correct places, at the correct moments do a correct job. Isn’t it? Mannu took
out the only notebook he had. The cover page had a photo of Albert Einstein.
Mannu looked at his hairs, his fingers, the wrinkles on his cheeks. What should
be momentarily extracted from the photo, held him in a dilemma. But one thing
that he could extract the very next moment was yesterday’s memory. Scarf, green
top, Pia, female...
“9 minutes and 29 seconds remaining.”Vivi interrupted in a
smutty voice.
“Ok...Ok...let’s begin.”Mannu said.
“Sure?”Asked Vivi.
“Come on Vivi, don’t waste time. You narrate the questions and
the answers, I’ll just write them down...Hurry up.”And they began.
“First question...What are the Faraday’s laws of electromagnetic induction? Explain...”
“First question...What are the Faraday’s laws of electromagnetic induction? Explain...”
Everything blurred at first except the Orkut scrapbook.
“But why did she scrap me? Did it hurt her too?”
“Hello...Hello...Hello...Is anybody there?”Vivi questioned.
“Oh...I’m sorry. Yes...Yes...The first question Vivi.” Mannu
said, perplexed.
“The Faraday’s law of electromagnetic induction.” Vivi narrated
being compact.
“Such a weird question to write down. Isn’t it Vivi?” Mannu
questioned him.
“Weird, but why?” Vivi questioned.
“Because it has a weird answer...”
“If you really want to complete,
then write it down fast. Time is running faster than the bus.”Vivi said.
The bus reached Hazratganj and they were minutes away from the
school. Every day the bus halted at the pan shop near the chauraha for the
driver’s delight. The hoarding above read Chotelal panwala. Next to it was a
sweet shop. No day passed when Mannu and Vivi didn’t have jalebis from Chotelalal
mithaiwala. When did their taste turned to a habit was unknown to both.
“Come Vivi let’s go.”Said Mannu walking hurriedly towards the
gate, balancing himself through the handle bars and they stepped down the bus
as soon as it halted. Mannu kept his hand on Vivi’s left shoulder and told him
that some questions had no answers and some questions need no answers and these
physics questions fall in the second category.
“Your answers seems questions to me.”Vivi said and just smiled
unable to resist the temptation of the hot and crispy jalebis.
“Good morning Chotelal”
“200g jalebis Chotelal.”Mannu ordered as it was his day to pay.
The packet was always ready for school kids. This prompt service had given a
good name to Chotelal. All the way they enjoyed jalebis. Smoke from heaps of
dust still entered Mannu’s nostrils but the jalebis smelled more intense. 200g
never filled their appetite but the packet cost Rs 10 straightaway, so they
refrained from a heavier purchase.
Students in blue and grey ran in all directions. Boys on
bicycles and bikes raced against our bus and eventually they won. The school
was near.
“Tomorrow is your turn Vivi. Don’t forget.”Mannu said while his
tongue was busy removing the leftovers among the teeths.
“Tomorrow...Does it come?”Vivi replied interrogatively.
“Ok...Ok...If tomorrow doesn’t come then does the day after tomorrow exist Vivi?”Mannu questioned. He came up with silence. The bus reached the school and halted in front of the gates.
“Ok...Ok...If tomorrow doesn’t come then does the day after tomorrow exist Vivi?”Mannu questioned. He came up with silence. The bus reached the school and halted in front of the gates.
Children, parents and drivers were all over the place. Students
ran, jumped with their bags on their backs. Picking flowers was banned. Still
some plucked roses for their class teachers with smiles on their faces while
others cried to be left alone. Mannu and Vivi left the queue as they stepped
down and moved towards the cycle stands. Boys from other schools had gathered
around to meet their pseudo girlfriends. The meeting place was arranged by
choice so that a clear look at all the girls was possible.
“How can be boys be like this? Complete vagrants...” Mannu
cursed them and went back to the school, but today he did not hate them much.
He developed a sort of emotional companionship with the boys. He started to
realize how blissful a lover’s momentary look could be, how sweet and painful
could be the long wait for a single look.
Though considered otherwise by the faculty members, the students
weren’t shy to admit that the school was in a dilapidated condition. The school
building gave a sense of complex among the students as nearby stood The Army
School with its enviable grandeur. The never ending construction work with
bricks piled up near the cycle stand, labors moving in and out of the building
the whole year was the only assurance which checked the complexity from
growing. The canteen adjacent to the entry gate of the school created an
unnecessary brouhaha but was the only place to enjoy the meager luxuries the
school campus offered. It took around five minutes from the canteen to reach
the assembly ground, only after passing through another spot of intense chaos
in the morning-the cycle stand.
The stage for the morning assembly was already set with drums,
harmonium and a table. A group of singers with the music teacher as the alto
sang songs for practice. Primary and junior grade students were already queued up
according to their heights. Mannu’s bus was already late, but being late in
some cases brings good rewards. The late comers were queued up in a separate
row next to girls and after the assembly they had to warm their bodies till the
start of the second lecture. All the boys had to run rounds of the ground.
Girls were spared. But this was the best idea to escape the physics lecture and
bunk the assignment. The prayer commenced with Sanskrit verses, gayatri mantra
and the national anthem was a part of the valedictory session followed by words
of Mr. Sharma, the principal. Today’s wisdom words of Mr. Sharma were on the
role of punctuality and discipline in the life of an individual. His words
served as a perfect critique to the start of Mannu’s day. His look was directed
to the late comer’s queue giving it complete resemblance to a gaze. Height of a
boy from class 11th was one sound reason of his attention and re attention
towards the queue. The boys had clearly understood the purpose of today’s topic
by Mr. Sharma.
Soon after the assembly, the run started as the ground was set
to empty. A whistle blew and they all started running, unknown of the
destination. Vivi had left and he was attending Mr. Maurya’s physics lecture.
His pleading to the P.T. instructor had worked. Mannu didn’t approach the
instructor. Today, there was no one to defeat as Vivi had left and others were
all good athletes.
Mannu’s waist belt was
disoriented, shirt collar was wet, black shoes soaked enough dirt to shine
brown and his hairs flew in all directions as he stopped after circling the
sixth round in walks. He picked up his bag and reached P&F at the backyard
of the school. This was ‘Pines and Flowers’ as named by pass outs. Green was at
its exquisite display in this area just behind the school. One could find
leaves and flowers of varied size, shape and probably every form of green in
which it exists. It was a part of the old school building but the site had
lately been approved by the development authorities for construction of a religious
building. It was a different property now. Still no construction activity had
begun and the place looked like a botanical spectre. Wild and limitless! Very
few knew about a safe entrance to a safe spot there, but among the very few
science students of class 12th had been the pioneers. The safe route mantra was
handed over by the passing batch of class 12th to the next, like a tradition.
To make or to destroy one self was in the hands of the passer by. The escape
had at times been scary. Once Vivi had seen a snake here, so he was abstinent
to pluck the fruits one found there.
Time was up. The bell for the second lecture rang and Vivi went
to see Mannu at P&F. It was turn of the chemistry lecture by Mrs. Bhatt and
she was on a one week leave, so it turned out to be a free class. Mannu heard
some rustling of the leaves and saw that Vivi was behind him.
“Hey, Mr. Electromagnet, how was the class?”Mannu questioned
Vivi still engaged in a book.
“Good as always.”Said Vivi biting a guava kept beside Mannu,
keenly scrutinizing the surroundings.
“Did Mr. Maurya inquire about my absence?”Mannu asked, not so
sure about being answered.
“No...Not at all... I guess one day he’ll inquire about your
presence.”Vivi replied. Mannu nodded his head in disdain and they were silent.
“The sound of the river, immaculate in my ears,
And I flow with the stream,
believe me...
Today it’s not a dream.”
And I flow with the stream,
believe me...
Today it’s not a dream.”
Mannu recited these lines to Vivi. He knew he was not right in
missing classes, but he could also not afford to miss his love for poems.
“Nice...”Vivi’s emotions were confined in a single word.
“Let’s go back Vivi.”
They moved slowly crossing the staff rooms, the primary and
junior section of the school premises and reached the playground. Crossing it
was not a child’s play. There was no permission to be in the playground except
for the games period which was only twice a week for the senior secondary
section. Oh! doesn’t a wanderer knows better where to hide and where to move?
Two halts below the window panes of the principal’s room, one at the
intersection of the primary and senior classes and they reached safe to their
class.
The room was dim, lit with one tube light above the blackboard
and windows only in one row. The sun rays warmed and lighted the classroom. The
walls were painted in yellow several years ago. The last seat adjacent to the
windows was the one where Mannu used to sit. The two ceiling fans couldn’t
circulate the required amount of air. The teacher and the students compensated
it by note books. A government school just like the government! There were
separate rows for boys and girls but they were always misaligned. One row was
trying to merge with the other or it would be much better to say that boys were
trying to merge with the girls.
It was the mathematics lecture, arranged for the absence of Mrs. Bhatt and Mr. Pandey, the class teacher taught the subject. He was a man in his late fifties with a bald head. He wore round, full rimmed black spectacles and a wrist watch in his right hand. Students wondered why he wore a wrist watch when he was always late for the class. Finally, he showed up.
It was the mathematics lecture, arranged for the absence of Mrs. Bhatt and Mr. Pandey, the class teacher taught the subject. He was a man in his late fifties with a bald head. He wore round, full rimmed black spectacles and a wrist watch in his right hand. Students wondered why he wore a wrist watch when he was always late for the class. Finally, he showed up.
“Gooooodd Mooooorrrrniinnngg Sirrrrr.” All stood up and wished
him a dull, monotonous good morning.
“Sit down.”He said in response addressed to all 52 students
without even looking at one. He wore the same yellow sweater as yesterday with
black margins, black pentagonal structures covered the front part. The back was
plain yellow. He held the text book in his left hand. The trouser had little
chalk dust just near the pockets but the fingers were all textured in white
powder. He always carried two pieces of chalks in his shirt pocket and in
moments the class began on the subject of the definite integral. On and on he
wrote the formulas, solutions and so did everyone, Mannu was struggling.
“Vivi...Viviiii...”Mannu whispered. Vivi just looked at him and
motioned his eyebrows.
“Complete kiya?”Mannu questioned him, stealing a look from Mr.
Pandey. He motioned his eyebrows again and smiled.
“What!!!”Mannu exclaimed with eyes opened wide.
“Am I the biggest fool in the class?”Mannu questioned himself
and suddenly the bell for the third lecture rang. It was actually the
Mathematics lecture which were now two in a row.
“Is yes the answer?”Mannu questioned himself again. He looked
above, left and then right, reconciled himself on a NO and he was sure that the
bell indeed signified this. Ashamed a bit, he burrowed himself in the notebooks
and came out with the answer. He looked around and smiled, Vivi was busy with
some questions and so were others. Mr. Pandey had written the complete list of
formulas and the rest of the period was devoted to practicing questions based
on them. Mannu had build up a not so strong concept, but it was good enough to
solve the text book questions. He picked up another question, it was done,
another one and it was done again. He finished the seventh question till the
bell for the recess rang.
“Yaar 8th question of Exercise 6.4 was a bit tricky, but I got
through.”Sid was busy wrapping up his notebooks. Mannu was standing idle. He
knew that it was futile to ask for help on that question. It would rather bring
in mockery.
“Kyaaa..Oh God! You couldn’t solve that one???Oh God! Oh
God!.”Sid would speak out, as always, if asked for assistance. To divert the
conversation Mannu opened the tiffin box and placed it on Vivi’s desk. The idea
worked.
Two paranthas disappeared in
less than two minutes as there were six, sometimes seven hands devouring them.
Man is always a connoisseur of good food, aren’t you? It was thirty minutes past
eleven and the ground was all set. It was a free to use area in the lunch.
Today, team blue had to bat first as team grey had lost the toss. These two
cricketing teams evolved their names from the colour of the school uniform,
blue and grey. The lunch period was designed more for cricket rather than
eating purposes.
The stumps were set, fielders in position by the gray team. Vivi was on strike. Blue team was the best from the past three years as Amit captained it impeccably from head to toe. Mannu was on the non-strikers end. The first ball and a six! Vivi did it immaculately on every first ball. The next two were dot and for the fourth delivery the blue team needed a second batsman. Amit came on the crease. He was the tallest in the school, the best athlete and he never wore a tie. It was a privilege for being good in academics and sports. Girls started lining at the boundaries just like flies gathered near honey. Mannu wondered if they came to see him or Amit, but after introspection he ended up hurting himself.
It was the second last over, precisely the third over and Mannu was on strike. He looked up at the fieldsmen, the girls beyond them and he found her looking at me. A blurred image of Pia appeared at the far end of the boundary. Mannu didn’t understand why was all this happening, why was she there; present even in her absence? He had to be her hero by every means. He stepped down at the crease and Aadil was the bowler, probably Shoaib Akhtar in disguise. The long off was called in. A slip was in place.
“Sixes...only sixes will do” Mannu repeated this phrase in his mind as he positioned himself. The bowl came flying at a speed of millions of miles and it went straight, missing his legs, missing his bat and just kissing the stumps. Clean bowled!!!!
Hurray!!! Wow!!! Claps and cheers were heard as a good striker of the blue team was knocked down on zero. His throat dried and he couldn’t gather enough courage to look beyond the boundary. His head was down like a hungry horse feeding himself from his mouth bag and he reached the assembly stage, the pavilion. Strengthening his veins he looked up but she was nowhere to be seen.
“Girls take all the positive energy.”Vivi said partially to himself and partially to Mannu. The score was thirty seven in four over’s with loss of two wickets. The batting of the grey team was to continue the next day.
The stumps were set, fielders in position by the gray team. Vivi was on strike. Blue team was the best from the past three years as Amit captained it impeccably from head to toe. Mannu was on the non-strikers end. The first ball and a six! Vivi did it immaculately on every first ball. The next two were dot and for the fourth delivery the blue team needed a second batsman. Amit came on the crease. He was the tallest in the school, the best athlete and he never wore a tie. It was a privilege for being good in academics and sports. Girls started lining at the boundaries just like flies gathered near honey. Mannu wondered if they came to see him or Amit, but after introspection he ended up hurting himself.
It was the second last over, precisely the third over and Mannu was on strike. He looked up at the fieldsmen, the girls beyond them and he found her looking at me. A blurred image of Pia appeared at the far end of the boundary. Mannu didn’t understand why was all this happening, why was she there; present even in her absence? He had to be her hero by every means. He stepped down at the crease and Aadil was the bowler, probably Shoaib Akhtar in disguise. The long off was called in. A slip was in place.
“Sixes...only sixes will do” Mannu repeated this phrase in his mind as he positioned himself. The bowl came flying at a speed of millions of miles and it went straight, missing his legs, missing his bat and just kissing the stumps. Clean bowled!!!!
Hurray!!! Wow!!! Claps and cheers were heard as a good striker of the blue team was knocked down on zero. His throat dried and he couldn’t gather enough courage to look beyond the boundary. His head was down like a hungry horse feeding himself from his mouth bag and he reached the assembly stage, the pavilion. Strengthening his veins he looked up but she was nowhere to be seen.
“Girls take all the positive energy.”Vivi said partially to himself and partially to Mannu. The score was thirty seven in four over’s with loss of two wickets. The batting of the grey team was to continue the next day.
For the next half the sun shone bright enough to heat up the
classroom and induce drowsiness in almost fifty percent of the cool, young
minds. The clock ticked, but with pace enough for a tortoise to be the victor.
Gradually and eventually the day passed, the last bell rang and the students as
well as some teachers hurried to catch up their vehicles. Leave from duty was
like gold served in a silver spoon. Unfortunately this was the saddest moment
of the day for lovers. Separation brings sufferings, but they always had the
evening tuitions or the next morning to be reunited. The vagrants which were
found near the cycle stand in the morning had some new faces among them. Their
demeanour was fresh and energetic unlike the bored and tired faces of girls who
moved from the other side of the school gates. Children purchased ice creams
and chips for their delight clinching onto the sides and back of the thelewala
and the auto and bus drivers shouted, compelling them to make quicker moves.
Those with personal vehicles had nothing much to eat but they busied themselves
by flaunting on the bikes or cars around the school gates. The show was great
at times. Amit would come up with a wheeley on his CBZ. A few members of the
grey team were part of a biker’s group and they would hoot around in circles to
display heroic stunts for free. Lovers, still, found calmness and serenity to
exchange romance. Accidents were rare, tears were few and punishments too. Mr.
Sharma’s absence meant fearlessness, limitlessness which sometimes ended in
chaos. Amid this Mannu and Vivi ran towards the bus and took the last seat
again.
“Good night Vivi.”Mannu said and he repeated in return. He took
out the handkerchief, wrapped it on his eyes and slept.
The bus had crossed the cycle parking and was almost a hundred
metres away from there when Mannu heard shouts waking him up.
Mannuuuu...Mannuuuu...
He stood up abruptly and ran towards the gate. Vivi was still snoring.
The conductor gazed at Mannu in anger and finally rang the bell which was heard
in the driver’s chamber and the bus stopped. With a Hindi movie song on his
lips, he walked back. Mrs.K, Mannu and Channu had lunch together and they
rested until it was five.
In the evening they dressed themselves hurriedly, wore shoes
without socks and reached the E block ground. The stumps were set, teams were
made and it seemed as everyone welcomed the two cricket sultans. Channu always
flipped the ball amid his moves and Mannu hit square cuts and straight drives.
Among all the local players, Channu was the best bowler and Mannu was
considered pretty well with the bat. Both the brothers longed to be in the same
teams, but if it happened someday by chance, it would have been the greatest
injustice to the opposition.
Seven past five and the red or at times green coloured cosco
ball were delivered. The total number of over’s were announced somewhere in the
middle of the first one. The game lasted for six, seven or a maximum of eight
over’s; conditioned according to the number of players and the weather
forecasts by the teammates. One saw the uprooted stumps lay flat on the ground,
when the ball was in Channu’s hand. With the bat in Mannu’s hand, one would
find everyone beyond the boundaries, searching for the ball. He had understood
the pitch and every good length ball were harshly punished. The bowlers
considered a good length delivery to be their best bet, effectively
accompanying it with pace, but this combination favoured Mannu.. Half of the
times the game stopped and for the rest they continued it by a ten or twelve
rupee rubber ball. The balls were delivered till the last ray of the sun
reached the ground.
“It’s good to see you near the books Mannu.”Mrs. K spoke in a sarcastically.
“Mummy...you don’t know how much we love each other.”Mannu
replied caressing his books as if they were his friends. She smiled, patted on
his head and said,
”Hmmm...We’ll celebrate valentine day when your results come.”
Silence followed.
Silence followed.
”Results will show how much you both love each other.”Mrs. K
said casually, checking the cleanliness of Mannu’s hairs and asking him,
“When did you last cleanse your hairs with a shampoo?”
“Mmmm...I guess...uuhhh...three days ago. Are they dirty again?”
“Hmmm...there is a lot of dandruff. Wash them tomorrow without forget.”She spoke adamantly.
“Mmmm...I guess...uuhhh...three days ago. Are they dirty again?”
“Hmmm...there is a lot of dandruff. Wash them tomorrow without forget.”She spoke adamantly.
“Ohooo...don’t scratch it.”She held Mannu’s hand with force.
Nothing is ever hidden from your mother. Every word of Mrs. K
pervaded through worldly borders and revolved in Mannu’s head, just like a
cosco ball. Actually what she said was true. Mannu’s performance in academics
had come down to average. Nobody knew the exact reason, not even Mannu himself.
These words of Mrs. K produced guilt in his conscience. Trying hard to lock his
thoughts from wandering he concentrated on completing the exercise on the
definite integral. The needles of the square shaped clock were one above the
other when he looked at them. Fifteen minutes to nine! How long could he hold
his ever wandering soul to stay in this world which always found solace in
virtual ornamentation? The treasure of memories that was hidden behind the
formulas and equations unrevealed its sparkle as the clock struck 9.
Sometimes yes or no entangle the conscious of a man to such a
degree that he is phlegmatic to choose the either. The same happened with him.
“Yes, Pia would have scraped me.”
“No, why will she.” Mannu’s young mind became eloquent. Finally
he consented himself with the thought that the scrapbook will be the key to all
dilemma’s. He electrified the sleepy processor and entered the username and
password. His mind was overflowing with virtual questions and answers.
Gradually and eventually the web page loaded rather unloaded anxiousness.
Yes, there were no scraps from Pia. He searched Avi’s profile
and found something that further deepened his sadness. Pia’s scrap to Avi only
five minutes ago!!! He cursed himself for being late and exhaled in despair.
Mrs. K and Channu were busy enjoying TV serials and their laughs were in clear
contrast to his disdain. Mannu scrutinized his profile, refreshed the home page
several times, but disappointment accompanied him the whole way long. The clock
showed twenty past nine and it was clear from the ambient smell that the cooks
were ready and Mrs. K would be calling soon. No one was online for a chat;
still he kept himself acquainted with a hope to see Pia. In an overflow of
thoughts he delivered some words in Pia’s scrapbook, before shutting down the
machine.
“Hello...Hope you would be fine.”It was the fourth approach when
he finally clicked on LOGOUT.
Spending half an hour on the
dining and a couple of hours with the books he started feeling dizzy, with
blurred guessing for the plans of tomorrow. But who knew the unexpected was to
happen.
Probably, this was the first morning this month when neither
Mrs. K came to wake Mannu up nor did the alarm awaken him. Strangely, he woke
up on his own.The ku-ku of the birds, the gentle morning breeze, the holy
sounds from the mandir and masjid seemed more pleasant today than sleepy
illusions. The morning was strange in itself. Everything at home except the
snoring of Mr. K and the grunning of the voltage stabilizer, was silent.
Un-identifying anything that would disturb the sleeps of other three, he left
out for a stroll.
The clouds today were impeccably white and the sun was
spotlessly orange. It seemed the skies had showered every colour to the earthly
creatures. The new green leaves, yellow, pink and violet flowers and the
melodies of the nature...Oh...How can one say that God doesn’t exist? In a
khaki lower, a white T-shirt and a bollywood melody on lips he started the walk
and kept on moving till the road end. He was overjoyed on seeing those real
world ornaments. With his hands completely horizontal up to the shoulder, he
took a flight. Into the clouds, upto those heights.Onto the land with millions
of smiles. Stroller’s, passer-bye’s, students on cycles and scooters smiled and
giggled as he passed through. Today he had felt a peel of life touching him.
Namaste to uncles and aunts was also a tireless companion. On the way back home
he planned and re-planned, calculated and recalculated the schedule for the day
with 9 p.m. reserved for his virtual friends. The density of milkmen and students
had increased; the intensity of manmade sounds had increased and now, the
nature revealed its beauty solely by human activity.
It was a grey Tata Indica, a V2 version that stood in front of
the gates. An old man in a red sweater washed his face on the other side of the
road. Mannu opened the gates, this time in hurry and seconds after he heard a
voice, dull and traditional.
“Salaam sahib.”The man in the red sweater said wiping his hands
from his trouser. Mannu smiled and replied with a nod.
“This jug is yours Sahib.”He said as he handed Mannu the jug by
which he poured water on his face. In an avalanche of thoughts Mannu couldn’t
exactly conclude what was happening and what was to follow. It was clear that
this car service was for Mr. K, but the reason for its presence stood unclear.
Mannu looked in the jug as he moved in. It was just like the ocean of his
thoughts, neither full nor empty. Really, the morning was strange.
“What’s the car doing out mummy?”Mannu questioned Mrs. K as he
kept the jug near the sink. She came out in silence.
“Mummy, where is papa going?”Mannu asked again with a grim look
on his face.
More silence. The milk over boiled, the chapati turned black and
she was still rolling the other one. Her sobbing was clearly audible as he
turned off the gas.
“Mummy...Hiding tears?”He questioned and she flinched. She
hugged him and sobbed for a while.
“You’re getting late for school. Go get ready.”Mrs. K spoke
cleaning her eyes. Masking his expressions, Mannu left quietly.
“Papa has to join at Bareilly.”
Came a hesitant reply from her. Mr.K had been transferred to
Bareilly office only after a days’ notice. The insurance company he worked for,
was suffering a series of losses. Job cuts had been prominent in that financial
year but Mr. K and alikes had been spared owing to their age and family
responsibility. This little piece of consolation was enough that he had only
been transferred. Still the repercussions were grave for the family. Mrs. K and
the kids had to stay back in Lucknow. The children’s studies could not be
compromised. But the togetherness of Mr.K and Mrs. K had been cut through. It
was the first time after marriage that they had to live in different cities,
separate houses. Eat separate dinners. As a new member of the family,
nuclearization had entered the house. The father was leaving, the sons would
leave soon. The day was wrought with enough energy, the one which drains the
juice of life.
Mrs. K’s words ended the quietness, but infused silence. The
authorities sent the taxi for a gratitude service for the farewell day of Mr.
K.
Mid term exams had made it imperative for the kids to leave for
school. Mr. K’s farewell had to be lonely, unaccompanied. To avoid a sense of
grief he avoided sharing it with the family. He just waited for the day to
arrive and things to be told naturally. Throughout the bicycle journey, no
sweat bead rolled down Mannu’s forehead and no moment passed when his eyes
dried. This was a real gift from the real world. He was devastated, annoyed by
Mr. K for hiding the fact that he would leave. But he could not find anything
in his actions that made him liable to blame. It was Mr. K’s way of doing
things. Today, life had taught him a precious lesson. It keeps on rolling. Life
just dissolved the distances between two unknowns from Mumbai and Lucknow. A
forward spin! It evolved separation between a father and his son. Probably, a
head spin.
The sun, the trees and the clouds were still the same. The only
thing that changed was Mannu’s world. He rested the bicycle on its usual place.
Sitting under a tree he shed tears. Praying to God for a tomorrow just like
yesterday, he forgot that some prayers were never answered. It was seven past
one when the bus arrived. It was seven past three when it left without Mannu.
The students in uniforms had gone; leaving the streets barren.
He had never imagined this. He wondered how long would the days be? It never
felt as night until Mr. K arrived from duty. Dinners would be incomplete
without him. There would be no more expectation to study late night or wake up
early. The void at home...didn’t it give much freedom to Mannu? For the first
time he detested it. In a day he was all on his own. It was too much to ask
for.
He picked up his bicycle and reached the rail crossing of East
gate colony. Children in undergarments raced towards the tracks to wave the
passing train and sometimes they were lucky enough to see some passengers.
Their eyes opened wide as he opened the lunch box. Two paranthas disappeared
more quickly today by those overworked hands of children blessed with
insatiable hunger. Impervious to them, he again wondered about his childhood.
Days had passed so fast just like a flash of light. How both the brothers
stopped every game and dressed themselves immediately, but if they failed in doing
so, he never scolded. Discipline was transferred. How they used to tell him the
runs they scored in the local matches and he kept smiling, sipping tea. It had
all came to an end. Mannu couldn’t restrain the outflow of his thoughts and
wrote an unaddressed letter.
“Papa,
You never ask reasons for my
mistakes...
You never ask causes of my failures...
..................
....................
.....No one’s like you papa.”
You never ask causes of my failures...
..................
....................
.....No one’s like you papa.”
At the usual hour of the day, Mannu was back from school. The
three ate together and Mannu kept on smiling in an attempt to keep things
normal. Channu had to do the same. No cricket. Mr. K had reached Bareilly
safely.
Two days had passed and the three back home still gazed at the
clock at nine and sometimes at ten, waiting for Mr. K. The feeling ran through
the house as if they had lost him. It was so grave. Sometimes a single moment
of sadness overcomes thousand moments of happiness.
Strange! Every activity had changed with a few ticks of the
clock. The phone beep replaced the car horn, no plan was the plan of the day
and Mrs. K didn’t miss any TV serial episode due to NEWS interference. She had
found her solace. Things changed. Tears replaced smiles. Memories replaced the
loved ones.
But in this real world of God, sufferings exist because happiness
exists. The clock struck nine and it was the third time when Mannu was not to
sit idle in front of the PC, just clicking on profiles and refreshing the home
page. It was in front of the pc, that Mannu had found solace. Today, he was to
get a tenth scrap from Pia as the ninth read,
“C U 2MROW @ 9...”
The ticks of the clock slowed, lengthening the seconds and the
minutes. But as Mrs. K always said that patience was a great virtue, so Mannu
lived by her words. It was five minutes past nine and Pia was online.
“Hii..” He typed hurriedly pressing his lips in anxiousness.
“Hiieee...”She replied.
“Which course are you pursuing?”Mannu questioned out of the
blue. But she was comfortable with it.
“F.Y.J.C.....” Scraps: 701. The scrapbook on the home page screen
showed.
“F.Y.J.C....???”Mannu questioned again soaked in confusion.
“First year Junior college....”
“Would u lyk to tell me anything abt urself Pia?????”
“Actually....I have 2 leave...”The scrapbook read.
“So wen r v knowing each other????”Mannu typed in
disappointment. He was trying to figure the reason of her leaving in haste,
blaming his mediocrity.
“Nt sure...probably at 9....byeeeee tc...”
His thoughts traversed north, east, west and south in search of words to keep her in front of the PC. Finally he asked her a question which he should have asked a couple of days ago or should have never asked it.
His thoughts traversed north, east, west and south in search of words to keep her in front of the PC. Finally he asked her a question which he should have asked a couple of days ago or should have never asked it.
“How do u know me Pia???”
“Avi told me evrythn bout u Mr. Deepal... nw I hv 2 leave
byeee.”She replied.
Twenty four hours had passed just wondering about tomorrow and
yesterday and trying to live in the present. After a long wait it was 9p.m. and
finally Mannu was in the present. Pia was online again.
“Hiieee......”
“Hi...”Mannu replied in his favourite font. He had made up his
mind to keep the chat comfortably longer.
“So how was the day Pia???”
“Rocking...as alwaz...”She replied.
“Mine was also gud...”The font was aerial this time.
“Ok...gr888...”She replied.
Now he was left with no question that could prolong the talk for
even several minutes.
“Had ur dinner Pia???”He questioned, perplexed whether he should
ask her such personal questions. No reply for a minute further deepened his
anxiety. There were only two possibilities his young mind could consider. Maybe
she was writing a sentence with some good big words or she was writing
something next to nothing. But as usually the second option picked him up.
“Naaa....”She finally answered.
“Ok...”
“Did u have ur dinner...?”She questioned for the first time.
Mannu was smiling. He was dreaming worlds before every word he wrote in reply.
“Naaa....”He replied with a coy smile on his face.
“Hey...copy cat....”She replied with a combination of some
smiley’s, whose meaning was beyond the scope of Mannu’s ORKUT vocabulary.
“What does the smiley’s convey Pia...???”
“Oh...poor boy...”She replied with a new combination of smiley’s.
“???????” He typed in anguish. After all he sounded like a bore, unable to impress Pia.
“I mean...dey alwaz convey SMILES Mannu...” This really planted a bigger smile on his poor face.
“Ok...dats good to know...”
“Hmmmm......”Mannu’s scrapbook showed.
The eternal time passed with every new word we wrote, gifting an eternal sense of happiness.
“Oh...poor boy...”She replied with a new combination of smiley’s.
“???????” He typed in anguish. After all he sounded like a bore, unable to impress Pia.
“I mean...dey alwaz convey SMILES Mannu...” This really planted a bigger smile on his poor face.
“Ok...dats good to know...”
“Hmmmm......”Mannu’s scrapbook showed.
The eternal time passed with every new word we wrote, gifting an eternal sense of happiness.
“Ok...have 2 leave Mannu...bbyeee....”
Mannu immediately gazed at the clock which showed twenty minutes past nine. All the happiness vanished.
“But...u said v’ll be knowing each other 2day...”Mannu questioned while preparing himself for the next scrap.
“U neva asked me nethn Mannu....”She answered.
“But...”What else could he write?
“Bbyeeee...tk cr...C U 2MROW @ 9...”She replied.
“Tomorrow never comes Pia...newaz...bbyeee...tk cr...”Mannu wrote in the simplest font as the chances of consideration were highly low. HE clicked LOGOUT . Overturning the pages of the book that laid beside the monitor, Mannu learnt how to accept the unchangeable.
After dinner he went upstairs, and with the guitar accompanying him, every time he found a melody lying in some corner of the roof top. God has his own ways of imparting wisdom. “Every great outcome is the result of a moment’s inspiration” he thought. The calm moonlight shone silvery, the gentle cold wind rustled pleasantly in resonance with the guitar chords and Mannu wrote a composition.
“The other side of the moon
Just like your face.
Hiding away from me,
But still caught in the shades.
Mannu immediately gazed at the clock which showed twenty minutes past nine. All the happiness vanished.
“But...u said v’ll be knowing each other 2day...”Mannu questioned while preparing himself for the next scrap.
“U neva asked me nethn Mannu....”She answered.
“But...”What else could he write?
“Bbyeeee...tk cr...C U 2MROW @ 9...”She replied.
“Tomorrow never comes Pia...newaz...bbyeee...tk cr...”Mannu wrote in the simplest font as the chances of consideration were highly low. HE clicked LOGOUT . Overturning the pages of the book that laid beside the monitor, Mannu learnt how to accept the unchangeable.
After dinner he went upstairs, and with the guitar accompanying him, every time he found a melody lying in some corner of the roof top. God has his own ways of imparting wisdom. “Every great outcome is the result of a moment’s inspiration” he thought. The calm moonlight shone silvery, the gentle cold wind rustled pleasantly in resonance with the guitar chords and Mannu wrote a composition.
“The other side of the moon
Just like your face.
Hiding away from me,
But still caught in the shades.
The shine of the moon
Just like your twinkling eyes...
Just like your twinkling eyes...
Says you’re somewhere near
Not far from here
When I close my eyes...
Not far from here
When I close my eyes...
Oh Oh moon, just take my heart...
So that I’m near to my sweetheart.
So that I’m near to my sweetheart.
Oh Oh moon, just take my love...
And give it all away, to the one I love.
And give it all away, to the one I love.
Your innocent smile
Takes all my breath.
Your gentle touch,
Takes all I have.
Takes all my breath.
Your gentle touch,
Takes all I have.
This life is yours
But you’re still lost...
But you’re still lost...
In those shades of light
Which are spread so wide
Throughout this long night...
Which are spread so wide
Throughout this long night...
Oh Oh moon, just take my heart...
So that I’m near to my sweetheart.
So that I’m near to my sweetheart.
Oh Oh moon, just take my love...
And give it all away, to the one I love.”
And give it all away, to the one I love.”
The shehar had shown beautiful mornings and afternoons. The late
night rains had further beautified this morning and enlivened the city. Mannu
was overjoyed by his yesterday’s achievements and Pia was to be his first
listener. His thoughts flowed past, present and halted in the vicinity of
future. Sometimes, it’s bliss guessing the happenings of tomorrow or late
today, especially in Physics classes. There is indeed no significance of
creating or destroying any law. Isn’t it? Time lengthened by light years as
Mannu waited for the clock to struck nine. HIs watch showed fifty minutes past
eight, but the skies were clear blue and the wait was still long.
The rains had abolished the local cricket matches. Both the
brothers spent that wine evening on the house roof practicing their subjects,
preparing for the exams and gazing disappointedly at the passer byes, the wet
cricket ground and the broken wires. The wait for the clock to struck 9 had
never been so long as it was today. As soon as the Azul wallpaper appeared,
displaying the icons, Mannu clicked on INTERNET EXPLORER numerous times to open
the Orkut login page, just once.
Life would have been worthless, if only the good came in one’s
life. True? Yes, probably. INTERNET EXPLORER CANNOT DISPLAY THE WEBPAGE. When
Mannu read this several times, he realized the worth of this insignificant
life. In a drive of anxiousness he diagnosed the connections, plugged and
unplugged the cables of the broadband modem and the telephone, opened and
closed the INTERNET EXPLORER, even restarted the PC twice, but what he hadn’t
dreamt off was clearly visible. Loneliness accompanied him the twenty five
minutes he sat in front of the useless machine, in a hope to see some real
displays that could soothe his conscience. He fancied the pain that Pia would
be passing through as he finally switched off the PC.
It was the second afternoon after the rains and the connections
had not been made up. They show in the TV serials the high inefficiency and
official procedures of the government offices. It was Mannu’s first interface
with these procedures. It left him upset and hopeless for the whole day.
Pursuing Mrs. K for repeated complaints in the department was futile. She had
strictly warned Mannu to focus on study. In a discreet way the disturbed
connection came as a sigh of relief to Mrs. K, but only as a mother. As a wife
and as a part of the K family, which resided outside Lucknow, the situation was
annoying. Mannu took recourse to his books. The moral outcomes and the general
understanding he had gained from them; blossomed forth. Life gives us many
chances to learn, but one has to cross mountains and lakes. It teaches us the
transient nature of sadness and happiness. We learn to smile when the pain is
deep and we learn to shed tears when happiness is immense. Isn’t it?
A part of his heart and mind was longing for the unanswered
questions, one sided talks and the yellow, black and red smiley’s on ORKUT. If
the telephone department would have listened to prayers, he would have added
many scraps in his ORKUT scrapbook, but it seemed a distant dream in the real
world, as they listen only to the phone calls. Unable to focus on studies an
abrupt idea struck him.
“Mummy I’m leaving to Vivi’s house. I have a few doubts in
Mathematics...he will help me.” said Mannu hiding his eyes from Mrs. K.
“Not now. It’s late and I will not allow you to ride through the highway.”
“Areyy..I will drive by internally. I will not touch the highway. I’ll also see Kushal’s house, vivi may be there.” Silence followed these words of Mannu.
“Everybody is doing joint studies these days...the exams are so near, but why don’t you allow me?” Mannu started blaming Mrs. K. He got irritated by the swift denial that came from her. But a mother loses to the cry of her child.
“Not now. It’s late and I will not allow you to ride through the highway.”
“Areyy..I will drive by internally. I will not touch the highway. I’ll also see Kushal’s house, vivi may be there.” Silence followed these words of Mannu.
“Everybody is doing joint studies these days...the exams are so near, but why don’t you allow me?” Mannu started blaming Mrs. K. He got irritated by the swift denial that came from her. But a mother loses to the cry of her child.
“No use of saying anything...saying no or a yes. If Papa would
have been here, he would have never allowed you. But this is my fate. I am to
blame if I don’t listen to you and if anything goes wrong again I am to blame.”
Her care and insecurity revealed through anger. But Mannu had to take this
step. He knew he was doing wrong, guilt was needling his conscience. Never had
he made such a demand. He was but overpowered by emotions and youth.
Permission was granted but not in the smoothest way. He raced
towards Vivi’s home, not to meet him but to access the internet, to give life
to his virtual world. He had lied to his mother and risked the consequences.
The cyber cafe was a dim room in a plaza which was occupied by
grocery shops. Mannu moved towards the counter and asked for a space there.
“It’s Rs.15 an hour.” The owner spoke, banging the table with
repeated thuds. He was a boy in his 20’s, untidy with his shave and hairs.
Mannu, at once, produced the Rs. 20 note he had. He looked at Mannu as if
trying to read the purpose of his visit.
“Kaam kya hai net pe?” He enquired.
“Kaam kya hai net pe?” He enquired.
“Mmm...hmmm just some project work and...” Mannu spoke in a
stiff voice, looking straight in the owner’s eyes to pretend his righteousness
for the visit. He completed himself by the gesture of his hands which conveyed
the casualness that was to accompany his purpose.
“ID do...” He demanded, looking sideways. This was a moment of
surrender. Mannu had no document, not even his school ID card or even the
library card to produce.
Mannu, with punched lips nodded his head sideways and said “I
don’t have it.” The owner said nothing, just kept the Rs. 20 note on the table.
“Is there any other cafe nearby?”
“No idea.”
The plan had come to a rapid and
an uneventful end. Lie had proved its insignificance. Now, Mannu was more
worried. If the connections weren’t restored in the upcoming days, all he could
do was to wait. Mrs. K would not permit again for joint studies. And how could
he be back so early was but another question that stifled him.
The trick hadn’t worked and a lie was added in his basket which
pinched his conscience. He found it hard to answer Mrs. K.
“I changed my mind...nothing else” he said and went back to his
room. Channu had caught a glimpse of his plan as he came out of the bathroom
and saw Mannu taking money from the box. It was strange for Mannu on not being
enquired about his whereabouts time and again, both by Channu and his mother.
The air in the house gave him a feeling that something had conspired during his
absence, but for some reason he was being spared. Maybe for catching him red
handed!
The morning sunshine had enhanced the percentage of humidity.
“Hi Mannu...Are we playing today?” A friend from the colony
enquired as he saw Mannu pass by.
“Let’s see yaar” said Mannu without waving a hello or a good
bye, also without looking at him. The conversation disturbed Mannu from within.
Inside him turmoil of thoughts was going on which came to an abrupt rest as he
spoke out. Bang! He hit the divider. No one came for his rescue. He halted,
took a sip of water and covered the rest of the ride at a very low speed with a
grim hope for the restoration of internet service.
But the omnipresent helps those who help themselves. As he
reached the entrance to the E block he found two men, one on a wooden ladder
and the other with a box and cables standing underneath an electric pole. No
lunch. No water. He kept his bag in the drawing room and left to assist them.
“I’m coming...Had paties on my way Mummy. Don’t worry about
lunch.” He said amid a fury and rode again on his bicycle. All the way he was
smiling, imagining the talks with Pia that were to follow
after the break.
after the break.
“The wires broke two days ago uncle...”Mannu spoke to the man
occupying the ladder. He was old enough for the job and had a clean shaven face
which hid all emotions except a dull look which engulfs the daily wage workers
after overwork.
“We got the complaint today...”He answered in a monotonous voice
which was in contrast to Mannu’s anxiety. He was struggling to look down while
speaking as it was difficult for him to complete the repairing with his short
appearance and his sleek hands which were enough to let the shirt sleeves swirl
with the wind. Still he managed to hold the screwdriver and balance himself on
the ladder. With every rotation of the screw the wrinkles on his face propped
up, as thin as the red and green wires, but untangled. A blue edged, white
coloured scarf lay on their shoulders used to wipe off sweat.
Do they really work so hard that handkerchiefs aren’t competent?
Mannu questioned himself analysing the dimensions of the scarf, gamchha.
“What’s your complaint number?”One of them questioned rubbing
his rheumy eyes.
“1607” Mannu answered specifically and without delay. The man up
the ladder was meanwhile busy checking and conforming operators functionality
by a cordless phone in his hand. I stood near them in assistance without a
handkerchief in my pocket and praised them for their hard work.
“It’s a tough task janaab... Shall I bring you some water? ”
Mannu praised them. His young conscience thought that these words would boost
their speed.
“How much time will you take janaab...?”
“Don’t you see we’ve begun?” The technician answered holding the
ladder firmly with both of his hands. It was the first time he gave a thorough
look at Mannu while speaking. Mannu’s words had done a bad job this time. He
understood that it was better to be silent but couldn’t control his anxiety.
“I mean...Half an hour or so...Isn’t it?”He questioned again to
resolve all doubts.
“Surely it will be complete by today.” Came a reply from the
technician with a sarcastic laugh. This seized the little amount of hope left
in him. Again, the only thing he could do was to pray.
“Mannuuuuu...Come in...They’ll do it better if you take
food...”Mrs. K had came walking to see Mannu and the call was audible to the
department workers as their necks turned towards her and then towards Mannu
with irritation on their suntanned faces. Mannu and Mrs. K left back.
“Why are you wasting your energy here? It’s better to take rest and
sit early for studies.”
“I don’t know why you’re not serious for your future. Children
are studying day and night to score good.....”she spoke with a sigh scratching
her forehead and continued “and look at you...Good for....phewww”.
Mannu’s heart beats ranged between 27 and 72 as he left the
place. He was silent all the while, as if unaware of the scolding from his
mother and walked the way with her towards home. After lunch he went back again
to check the progress. Mrs. K was on her bed on the usual time of afternoon
nap. The men had gone. Even the ladder had been removed from the pole. He ran
back again to check the connection. Fortunately, the job was done within an
hour. It was now that Mannu could take rest.
“Hieee....”...................................... 2 days ago.
“??”
“Hey Mannu... Whr r u...???”2 days ago.
It was the first time when it seemed that her smileys didn’t
convey smiles. Happiness lay in some corner of Mannu’s heart, but sadness
filled the other ones. He felt that he had missed a lot in these days. His
thoughts went up to the verge of imagination, drowsing himself in guilt. A girl
was not to be left alone in this careless way. This was not Mannu, now for Pia
he may be so. A boy like others unable to mange even friendship. How would Mannu
recover his sincerity was a question which puzzled him.
“I m leaving...”........................2 days ago.
“C U 2MROW @ 9...”.........................Received 2 days ago.
“Hieee...”
“Still busy....????”.........................1 day ago.
“Mannu...????”
“Hope 2 c u soon...”........................Received 1 day ago.
As they say silence is golden.
It really is. The previous one sided talks included questions from Mannu’s side
and in came some incomplete answers from Pia’s part. This two day quietness was
long enough to complete all those answers. After a two day’s wait, again it was
fifteen past nine and Pia didn’t show up. Mannu was busy framing answers to her
questions, but suddenly her photo clicked up in the on liners list. His eyes
widened and fingers started running on the keyboard.H, I, E< O....
“Hey how’s u Pia....???”
“I m online 2day...” Mannu typed,
unable to understand later why he wrote so when it was self understood that a
scrap meant being online. Afer a pause a message peeped in his scrapbook.
“Hey Mannu...!!! Whr r u...???” This
scrap from Pia just overwhelmed him, filled him with anxiety.
“Rains broke some branches of
trees...and they broke those joints of the wires which connect us...I m
sorry...”Mannu typed the phrases all in different colours being at most poetic
as he could be in these moments of anxiousness.
“K...”She replied. It seemed to Mannu
a casual answer, but he did not let any dark thought enter his mind.
“It rained dere 4 2 days....???”She
questioned.
“No...But services were
delayed.”Mannu replied, wiping off the sweat below his nose. He was nervous as
if he were at fault for the delay. Inside him he started blaming himself for
the delay. He also experienced a slight pain in his spine but without delay he
just stretched back and re oriented his mind towards the conversation.
“This neverrrrr happens in Mumbai...”
“Hmmmm...May be the winds are wiser
dere...”Mannu replied with some smiley’s. Now he had started understanding
their use.
“What could I do Pia...???”Mannu typed
again in an attempt to earn sympathy.
“Ya...u’re rite...”She replied.
Differences between a city and a shehar were evident. Yet time travelled with
the same pace in Mumbai and in Lucknow.
“So how’s lyf going...???”Mannu
replied to direct the talks towards something more beautiful, more close to
romance. Life of a girl itself is a romance.
“Rocking...”She replied with her
favourite answer.
“N wat bout u...???”
“Mine was rolling..but itz rocking
now...”He replied restraining his juggling fingers to type some more letters
which would show greater intimacy.
“U n Avi r gud friends...rite...???
“Ya...classmates around 2 yrs
ago...”She replied in the regular font without a pause as though she was
prepared for the question.
“She neva told me bout u Pia...!!!”Mannu
said in amazement.
“Ya...but I neva know why she did
so...and why would she do so?”Pia answered. The clock showed 9:30 pm. When a
cool breeze touches your hairs and enlivens your mind, you ought to love
staying in that gesture. Isn’t it? How could Mannu leave the PC when there was
an outflow of questions from a beautiful girl? Mummy’s calls, the whistles from
the pressure cooker and the TV dialogues were barely audible. Channu was busy
with his friends. Casual outburst of boyish laughters were heard in Mannu’s
room. He did no effort to avoid the temptation to join them. Forgetting every
duty, Mannu just stayed in the realm of his virtual world.
“She says u luk gud
Mannu...”.........................Received 1 minute ago.
“Oh...thnx 4 d praisal...”He replied,
speaking and typing the words together as well as complimenting them with a
gentlemanly bow. Every time when he found her online he stared at that 2 cm
display picture. Beautiful she was!!! But how could a boy like him, decent in
actions, shy at the heart and laconic in speech, praise a girl’s beauty in the
fourth chat? It was not a trait to be found commonly among the boys of the
shehar. But he could praise her beauty silently. And that he did while he
waited for her to reply. He could also smile at the pleasure he found in gazing
at her. But Mrs. K’s calls faded his ephemeral smile. Channu’s friends were
also leaving.
“Ok Pia..I hav 2 leave...”He replied
hesitatingly, simultaneously replying aloud to Mrs. K’s call
“Kkkkzzzz...bbyeee....C u 2mrow at
9...”She replied.
Life on ORKUT disappears as you click
on LOGOUT! His young mind forgot to sing his song rather type the song “Oh my
moon” for her. He punched his fore head in disdain, pressed his lips but
pretended to stay calm and took the dinner. Everything looked golden. They show
in the movie songs, the hero running in open grasslands with arms wide open in
fields surrounded by flowers of almost every colour. And at the most beautiful
phrase a scented scarf comes flying and mesmerizes him with her fragrance.
Mannu was that hero today and in pure bliss. He guessed, faintly, how Pia would
be? Had he started loving her? Or was it that Avi’s void had been filled and
that gave him solace? Was it this, was it that? Was it a yes, or a no?
“Unlock the bike
bhaiya...” Channu said aloud with a glitter in his eyes, which was visible
behind his black, full rimmed eye glasses. Although late, but safe, Mr. K had
arrived. And how it happened that Mannu glanced all the autos that halted but
missed the one which he so desired to see. They all smiled in unison at the
first look. Mr. K had caught the train directly after the office which was
evident from his attire. He was in formal clothing which one would not prefer
during travel. The boys had never seen Mr. K’s bearded chin, except during long
leaves meant to bring a contended end to family engagements which were usually
marriage and death. Also the wrist watch did not occupy its usual position. But
the boys did not enquire about these changes. The boys ignored these new
conditions as to keep Mr. K in comfort, as to pretend that he had just returned
from the branch in Lucknow and he was being received like it was an ordinary
day. But the spark on their faces, the curiosity to tell him about the classes,
the matches was trying to find a way out. They took hurried steps towards each
other and Mannu took the luggage bag and gave him the keys. Channu and Mannu
never left a chance to earn his blessings. They immediately bowed down to touch
his feet. The wrinkles on his trouser and the mud on his shoes were enough to
show the comfort level he has adopted in his new lifestyle. Their father seemed
a changed man, tired and less hopeful. Again they pretended.
The cool wind blew
their hairs and as they rode back. Channu was sitting between Mr. K and Mannu.
Mannu was smiling to himself. With the luggage bag on his shoulder, he sat in
the least space but when asked about his comfort he said “ Yes..I’m fine...I’m
fine.” He could have asked for more space. But he thought a little pain on his
part would compensate for Mr. K’s.
“How’s mummy?”He asked.
Channu spoke first.
“She’s also good.”
“What’s for the dinner
hmmm...?”
“It’s a surprise
today.” They both spoke aloud. It seemed the time had flew back, they had
become kids again. Mannu was shifting the bag between his shoulders, but was
adamant that he was comfortable.
“And what about your
studies?”He enquired. They were silent for a moment until they heard him
laughing.
“Fine Papa...all fine...”They
smiled as they stammerd these words. Channu looked at back at Mannu and blinked
his left eye.
Mrs. K was waiting
outside the gates of the house. At this moment she was the most joyous lady to
have her family near her. Her hands were besmeared in white flour. She wiped
them from her saree and took the bag from Mannu.
Within minutes they
were on the dining. Not much was discussed about his being alone in a new city.
It had happened for the first time after their marriage. Mrs. K had instructed
the boys to put up all questions in the next morning.
“Oh...today is a one
hour special episode.”She said hiding her anxiety in a broken smile as Mr. K
switched between news channels. It seemed things were back to the old days when
the family dined together, spoke less on the table and watched the daily news.
“Leave it...watch the
repeat telecast tomorrow.”Mannu said. There was no word from her and finally
she contended herself with the news channels.
Sunday was incomplete
without jalebis. They sat together, talked and laughed as they never dared to
waste this one day visit of Mr. K. A fraction of the day had passed and some
fear started climbing up in the room. The air became gloomy and hot. It was the
fear of the end of the day. The clock was ticking fast and Pia had shared the
some greetings. Sheeasily agreed to cut short the the chat as and when Mannu
told that he wanted to be with his father. This put Mannu in a dilemma. He was
amused as to why she could agree so easily? Why didn’t she request him to stay
a little longer? And on one hand he was imagining his future with a girl who
was so agreeable to him in different situations. So easily she understood him.
With sleep in his eyes
Mannu kick started the bike but Mr. K took the driving seat. It was 4 in the
morning and Mr. K had to sleep. The family moments had been dulled by the clock
and it showed the reality. Mr. K looked like a guest in his own house. The
whole shehar was asleep. Trees swayed with the wind and even the dogs didn’t
bark. Silently, the moon watched everything. After every few seconds the bag
left Mannu’s shoulder. Yawning and rubbing his eyes Mannu stood there. Mr. K
gave me the keys, positioned his waist belt and the search for an auto began.
This was strange for Mannu. People were awake at 4am!!! He was amazed, and at
the same time he kept guessing the world from where they came, repeating the
same words
’Charbagh...charbagh..Railway station..Charbagh station...”
“Take care of mummy and Channu...” said Mr. K, yawning and moving towards an auto. Mannu gave him the bag, touched his feet rather his shoes and he left off to catch the 5am train which eventually arrived at 6.
“Take care of mummy and Channu...” said Mr. K, yawning and moving towards an auto. Mannu gave him the bag, touched his feet rather his shoes and he left off to catch the 5am train which eventually arrived at 6.
16 December
“I wrote a poem...”
“Dats cool...”She said. Mannu could understand the meaning of that team of smiley’s that he saw in his scrapbook.
“Now tell me na...idiot.”Pia said.
“Dats cool...”She said. Mannu could understand the meaning of that team of smiley’s that he saw in his scrapbook.
“Now tell me na...idiot.”Pia said.
“The other side of your
face....
......... ..........
........Oh my moon
........love”
......... ..........
........Oh my moon
........love”
“Woooo!!! Someone is a
poet.”She replied. Mannu smiled and passed his fingers through his hairs.
“U’re gud Mannu...I’m
amazed..”She replied again.
“Thank you dear...Dats
2 nice of u...”Mannu wrote, blushing and sincerely aware of the dear he had
added.
“I guess dere must b
many more Mannu...”
“No...” wrote Mannu
with a blind guess that she overlooked that dear.
“But I need to read
some more...”
“I’ll try 2 write
some...”Mannu replied; not too sure whether he’ll be able to do it or not. No
was not allowed at this time. Now he had to do it more often and ensure that
his writings were pleasant to his first reader.
“No tries...I just want
it...”She replied.
19 December
“Bryan
Adams...Everything I do...”read Mannu’s scrapbbok, the light blue ORKUT page
reflecting the shade of the early morning skies.
“I too adulate him for
dis song...”replied Mannu in bold italics.
“Mannu...u no wat..”She questioned.
“Mannu...u no wat..”She questioned.
“Wat...???”Mannu asked
guessing the answer. Was she going to express her adoration for him or was she
going to say that she had started imagining a sweet future with him or was she
just going to tell him the title of a new song? He became nervous by these
passing questions. He feared if she, being a girl from Bombay, would ask him
the name of an artist he had never heard, or tell her favourite song which
Mannu had never heard.
“I love dose who can
sing well...”Pia said. Mannu felt calm and fancied the joy on her face.
“I do sing a bit...n
play guitars...”Mannu replied to earn some more praises.
“OOoohhh...don’t lie
nw...”She said typing in bold.
“No...I never
lie...”Mannu replied, anxious to prove himself.
“U neva told me b4...”
“U neva asked Pia...”
“U neva told me b4...”
“U neva asked Pia...”
“U u u copy cat...”She
replied. Mannu guessed how she would have been looking at this moment. She must
be laughing at this moment, pointing her fore finger towards the monitor, he
said to himself.
“Wen v’l c each oder...u’ll hav 2 sing 4 me...”
“Ok..agreed.”replied Mannu.
“Ok’s fade wid tym dear...Pia needs a promise...”
“PROMISE...”Mannu typed, soaking the sweat drops off his forehead.
“Bye dear...I lv talking 2 u...”She said.
“Oh really!!!...it’s my pleasure 2..” Unable to contain his anxiety in words Mannu started singing aloud. He had got a new direction in life. He had found someone for whom he could sing, write and be loved for that.
“Wen v’l c each oder...u’ll hav 2 sing 4 me...”
“Ok..agreed.”replied Mannu.
“Ok’s fade wid tym dear...Pia needs a promise...”
“PROMISE...”Mannu typed, soaking the sweat drops off his forehead.
“Bye dear...I lv talking 2 u...”She said.
“Oh really!!!...it’s my pleasure 2..” Unable to contain his anxiety in words Mannu started singing aloud. He had got a new direction in life. He had found someone for whom he could sing, write and be loved for that.
21 December
“N wat abt u Pia...???”
“Designing, painting n
a whole lot of stuff associated wid colours...”She replied.
“Luks really
colourful...U lyk a vibrant lyf..??Mannu questioned her.
“Ya...Ya...but how come
u no...???”
“It beats me...”He
typed, biting his tongue in a sense to please her. Two minutes had passed and
he saw no scrap from her. He prayed to God as for the first time he longed to
see her. Silence said much more than words could say.
“Thanx Pia...”wrote
Mannu, overwhelmed with emotions.
“For wat dear...???”
“U supported me wen dere wuz no one...”He replied with calmness entering his soul.
“Ya..but I’ll take sumthing in return...”
“Wat!!!”
“A song wid guitar...no no no...2 songs Mannu...wl u sing 4 me???” Her words, way of expression had now became much more casual.
“I’ll sing a thousand for you Pia” Mannu said to himself.
“Ya...dats a promise...”typed Mannu and clicked on POST SCRAP.
“For wat dear...???”
“U supported me wen dere wuz no one...”He replied with calmness entering his soul.
“Ya..but I’ll take sumthing in return...”
“Wat!!!”
“A song wid guitar...no no no...2 songs Mannu...wl u sing 4 me???” Her words, way of expression had now became much more casual.
“I’ll sing a thousand for you Pia” Mannu said to himself.
“Ya...dats a promise...”typed Mannu and clicked on POST SCRAP.
24 December
“Whr wer u Pia...???”
“Oh m sry 4 yesterday...M sry my baby...”
“Actually sum guests had arrived...”
“Oh m sry 4 yesterday...M sry my baby...”
“Actually sum guests had arrived...”
“Ok dear...”Mannu
replied pertaining to be happy. He had waited for long, but Pia had not replied.
“M so sry my baby I
couldn’t catch up...”
“It’s ok Pia...It’s f9...” Mannu was up in pride after earning the much needed affection from her.
“Hw wuz d day???”
“It’s ok Pia...It’s f9...” Mannu was up in pride after earning the much needed affection from her.
“Hw wuz d day???”
“M nt well Pia...I
don’t know wats troubling...” scratching his forehead, he typed.
“Oh no...I promise u’ll neva hav 2 w8 like u did yesterday...4give me plzzzz...”She replied. Maybe her absence was the cause of his sickness.
“Oh no...I promise u’ll neva hav 2 w8 like u did yesterday...4give me plzzzz...”She replied. Maybe her absence was the cause of his sickness.
“Hmmmm...”
“Come on hav sm food n
go 2 sleep...cum on go go go...”
“But I don’t sleep so early Pia...”
“But I don’t sleep so early Pia...”
“Ssssshhhhh...quiet...believe
me u’ll feel better...v’ll talk 2mrow...”She replied. Mannu consented himself
on every word of her. He was building a relation in which every word had its
significance. As the time flowed by, deepening their emotions and leaving Mannu
in euphoria everyday at 9:30pm, 9:40pm and sometimes even ten minutes later, he
realized that something was still absent. The moment he thought of adding a
word of intimacy, the clock deceived him. Wanderer, as we call the human mind.
It searches the good to soothe one’s soul. It was then his first double click
on YAHOO MESSENGER.
me: Hieeee dear...
Pia: Hieeee...
me: Merry Xmas...
Pia: Thank u same 2 u dear...
me: Wsh I cud send u cakes n gifts...
Pia: mmmm...Sm1 on d door Mannu...c u in a moment...
me: okk...
Pia: Mannu...d cake is delicious...
me: ??
Pia: I got ur gift sweetheart...
Mannu couldn’t resist the smile on my face on being Pia’s sweetheart.
me: Really!!!
Pia: Yaaaa...
me: Thanx...I luv d way u care...
Pia is typing a message
me: Thanx again...dis wuz really gud!!!
me: I hv 2 go 4 dinner...
Pia: My pleasure...
Pia: So early 4 dinner...y so???
me: For a Xmas delight at my colleagues home...
Pia: U’r leaving Mannu???
me: Hmmmm...
Pia: Wats his name???
me: Shez Zenin...
Pia: Ohhhh....Ok byeee...njoy...gud nyt...sweet dreams...
Pia has logged out.
Pia: Hieeee...
me: Merry Xmas...
Pia: Thank u same 2 u dear...
me: Wsh I cud send u cakes n gifts...
Pia: mmmm...Sm1 on d door Mannu...c u in a moment...
me: okk...
Pia: Mannu...d cake is delicious...
me: ??
Pia: I got ur gift sweetheart...
Mannu couldn’t resist the smile on my face on being Pia’s sweetheart.
me: Really!!!
Pia: Yaaaa...
me: Thanx...I luv d way u care...
Pia is typing a message
me: Thanx again...dis wuz really gud!!!
me: I hv 2 go 4 dinner...
Pia: My pleasure...
Pia: So early 4 dinner...y so???
me: For a Xmas delight at my colleagues home...
Pia: U’r leaving Mannu???
me: Hmmmm...
Pia: Wats his name???
me: Shez Zenin...
Pia: Ohhhh....Ok byeee...njoy...gud nyt...sweet dreams...
Pia has logged out.
The fog around the shehar wasn’t so dense and the winds weren’t too cold
either as they used to be around five years back. Still we had our vacations.
The day started much before the sun rays reached the roofs. Mannu couldn’t dare
to make an escape from those soporific quilts. There was again no use of
running away from the shower. Mrs. K said ’No breakfast before bath’.
It was the beginning of
a new year, start of a new chapter in the lives of the people of Lucknow. For
some it was a chance to break old promises, make new ones, futile though, for
some it was a beginning of opportunity and for others it was just a new day.
The shehar was decorated like the queen of Mughals to welcome 2009. Streets and
pathways were sparkling with various lights. On chaurahas and especially in
Love lane, several games were being organized by NGO’s and young entrepreneurs.
It was mandatory to be in pair, girl with a boy, to be a contestant. Offers and
discounts from apparel stores filled up the city magazines. A one week fashion
carnival was also being organized. Atul had been a member of the organizing
committee, but no one from Mannu’s school had the chance to even participate.
Atul didn’t had many friends in his own school. His group buddies were mainly
from colvin and Lamarts, and the girl friends with whom he sipped cold drinks
were just a part of his mercy. The boys from L’amartiniere and girls from
Loretto, as participants, fascinated the on goers. The newspapers told their
stories. Amidst all the fun and drama the shopkeepers and organizers were busy
making money.
Mannu was on his bike
with a half filled pocket and a dried petrol tank. The groups’ two hour
excursion in the heart of the city had proved much expensive than Mannu’s estimate.
It was 11:30pm and he was already in a debt of Rs.150 which he promised to
return Vivi before passing class 12th. They were eight together on four bikes.
Three were Channu’s classmates Yash, Bittu and Sukkhi who looked much elder
than Mannu but called him bhaiya in respect. Two were from Mannu’s class who
joined them just to increase the number of members, to give the on lookers a
feeling that they were a gang.
New plans had entered
their minds too. With a pledge to break every traffic rule before 00:00, all
stopped at the Hazratganj chauraha. Channu took the driving seat from Mannu.
Why were they doing it, no one even questioned? It was sheer fun that these
boys had sought to befriend. The red light turned yellow and Mannu’s pulse rate
started rising up. He was going to perform the first ever bike stunt of his
life. The rule said that everyone except the driver had to stand straight on
the back seat while crossing the chauraha. Mannu had never done this before.
Vivi was safe, mentally, as he was the driver. Mannu was still unwilling to do
it until he saw Bittu and Yash, two of them already standing on one seat. It
was Sukkhi’s Karizma.
Every one is a coward
at some point in his life, but Mannu didn’t dare to lose his respect among the
boys by sitting and showcasing his cowardice or whatever it was that stopped
him from performing the stunt. It was to be treated as cowardice, he would be
labelled with a non masculine character. Mannu knew in his heart that if he
failed to do so, he would be talked about in school in a sarcastic tone. All
his qualities would come to a dark. Other thing that pushed Mannu to perform
the stunt was the unanimous decision that the failures would pay for the
dinner. He couldn’t afford another burn in his pocket. Courageously, Mannu sat
on his knees. His back wasn’t perfectly straight and he weighed heavily on
Channu’s shoulders.
Green lights, gears
down, rolling and rolling and a crash. Sukkhi, Btitu and Yash were all down and
their bike was rolling in circles until it collided with a luxurious sedan,
parked almost safely. Numbness followed. Their plans changed abruptly. Vehicles
stopped and heads turned towards them.
Sukkhi... Bittu...
Yash... were the shouts from the other members. How come their expert driver
had been down? It could not be Sukkhi’s mistake. It was surely a mechanical
failure. Fear was climbing their skins. The police would arrive soon, who would
pay for the sedan and the treatment of fellows? How would they face their
school principal? Nervousness was climbing up their medullas. Worse followed
worst! The driver, in a white uniform, with a black driving cap, stepped out
and without a word he slapped Bittu. He was sitting down near the rear tyre of
the sedan. He had suffered a visible injury on his knee, rest was unseen but it
was hurting him, making him unable to stand up. The slap was heard loud. How
could an eighteen year old boy be still after a slap? Bittu stood up abruptly
and slapped the driver. Mannu ran down, kicked the car. Meanwhile, Channu hit the
car’s headlight.
“Let’s run, Let’s run”
were the voices from the unhurt members.
Police whistles were
clearly audible now. Clinging upon one another they all made an escape after
ruining the car and the driver. .
It was all over in a
minute. The three of them were bleeding, as if making a trail for the police to
follow them. For the sake of friendship Mannu increased his debt to Rs.400.
Even after winning he had to pay for their medic and dinner. They all regretted
the whole way long for what had been done. Mannu and Channu knew if Mr. K would
have been here this would never have happened. They would have been safe at
home, waiting anxiously for the TV show to announce the mark of 2009. Mannu
missed him. He wondered what Pia would think of him if she knew it?
It was 00:02 as Mannu
saw my wrist watch. The wind was getting colder. Mannu closed his eyes, thanked
God for adding a new year in his life and for all He gave him in 2008. He
begged pardon for all don’ts that he had done. Fire crackers lighted the skies;
volume of songs in the city was raised. They moved slowly inhaling the aroma of
the delicacies that sold and enjoying the Bollywood songs.
New Year brought new
opportunities, new movies, new songs, but one couldn’t leave the old books.
Pia: Hey...u dere?
me: hiii Pia...Happy New Year
Pia: Happy New Year 2 u 2...
me: lukin very happy today...
Pia: Itz a good reason 2 b happy...a new day of the New year...
me: gud...ne resolutions???
Pia: Oooohh...366 resolutions 4 365 dayzz...
me: whaaattt!!!
Pia: Nothing...u no v partied all night...dance,gifts,songs...it wuz real fun
me: i 2 njoyed yestrdayzz night...
Pia: What u did???
me: just a city ride on my bike...
Pia: Was it enough???
me: yaaa...wat else???
Pia: Uuuufffff...so boring...
Pia: N hw many pegs of dRiNkS u had??
Pia: Dnt lie 2 me....
me: I don’t drink Pia...don’t u know dat???
Pia: Oohhh...I wuz joking dear...
me: i wuz joking 2...
Pia: Whhhhaaaatttt!!!
me: bingo....hehehe...i really don’t drink...
Pia: Hmmmmm....dats better
me: cn i ask u smthn???
Pia: Yup...
me: wat wuz d most special gift u got in 2008???
Pia: Mmmmmm....
me: wat???
Pia: Still thinking...
Pia: More new friendzz...more gifts n more luv...
me: i asked d most special 1...
Pia: Yaaaa...they all are MOST special ones...
Pia: Mmmmmmm...
Pia: More new friendzz lyk U...
me: U alwaz make me smile...
Pia: U alwaz make me smile...
me: thanx 4 dis...
Pia: thanx 4 dis...
me: wats dis...???
Pia: wats dis...???
me: u copy cat...
Pia: hehehehe...(smileys)
me: hav a gud year ahead...
Pia: Same 2 u..
Pia: Hv 2 leave nw...v r goin 4 an outing...
me: whr???
Pia: Nt sure yet...
me: ok njoy...tc
me: wsh u a Happy New Year again...
Pia: U 2 tk cr...wsh u gud luck 4 ur future...n 4 ur studies...
Pia: bbyeee
me: byeee
Pia: C u @ 9...
me: yup...bbyeeee...
me: hiii Pia...Happy New Year
Pia: Happy New Year 2 u 2...
me: lukin very happy today...
Pia: Itz a good reason 2 b happy...a new day of the New year...
me: gud...ne resolutions???
Pia: Oooohh...366 resolutions 4 365 dayzz...
me: whaaattt!!!
Pia: Nothing...u no v partied all night...dance,gifts,songs...it wuz real fun
me: i 2 njoyed yestrdayzz night...
Pia: What u did???
me: just a city ride on my bike...
Pia: Was it enough???
me: yaaa...wat else???
Pia: Uuuufffff...so boring...
Pia: N hw many pegs of dRiNkS u had??
Pia: Dnt lie 2 me....
me: I don’t drink Pia...don’t u know dat???
Pia: Oohhh...I wuz joking dear...
me: i wuz joking 2...
Pia: Whhhhaaaatttt!!!
me: bingo....hehehe...i really don’t drink...
Pia: Hmmmmm....dats better
me: cn i ask u smthn???
Pia: Yup...
me: wat wuz d most special gift u got in 2008???
Pia: Mmmmmm....
me: wat???
Pia: Still thinking...
Pia: More new friendzz...more gifts n more luv...
me: i asked d most special 1...
Pia: Yaaaa...they all are MOST special ones...
Pia: Mmmmmmm...
Pia: More new friendzz lyk U...
me: U alwaz make me smile...
Pia: U alwaz make me smile...
me: thanx 4 dis...
Pia: thanx 4 dis...
me: wats dis...???
Pia: wats dis...???
me: u copy cat...
Pia: hehehehe...(smileys)
me: hav a gud year ahead...
Pia: Same 2 u..
Pia: Hv 2 leave nw...v r goin 4 an outing...
me: whr???
Pia: Nt sure yet...
me: ok njoy...tc
me: wsh u a Happy New Year again...
Pia: U 2 tk cr...wsh u gud luck 4 ur future...n 4 ur studies...
Pia: bbyeee
me: byeee
Pia: C u @ 9...
me: yup...bbyeeee...
me: nw b off...
Pia: Ya...m leavin
byeee
me: byeee...
Pia has logged out.
It was a sunny noon.
Mannu switched on the PC for some sample papers. ORKUT home page was
undoubtedly much pleasing than any other web page. He signed in on ORKUT and
YM. After sampling the papers and reigniting his mind to solve those queries in
the least of time, he started filling others’ scrapbook to relax his young
mind. No doubt he was longing to see Pia online but with nearly any hope. It
seemed as if her presence, online, was much better than everyone else’s. Mannu
smiled to himself, thinking secretly as if he came online just to talk to her.
Suddenly his smile broadened, eyes widened and his hopes enlivened. YM showed
Pia is now online.
me: Hey...dere???
Pia: Hiii...howz u???
me: gud...
Pia: hw cm u’r onlyn???
me: jst 4 some questionnaires...
Pia: kk...how r STUDIES goin on???
me: f9...jst 2 mnths 4 boards n 3 for the BIGGER EXAMS...
Pia: ok...So sm BIG plans I guess...
me: hmmmm...smthng BIG n GOOD...
me: u no wat...
Pia: ??
me: I wuz w8ng 2 c u ol...
Pia: Oh!! dnt lie...
me: Really...I alwaz do w8 2 c u ol...
Pia: Mannuuu...
me: it feels gud 2 talk 2 u yaar...
Pia: mmmmmm hmmmmmm....n what next???
me: n I ms u...
Pia: yaaaa...i 2 ms u yaar...
me: Really!!!
Pia: yup...wats so surprising???cnt i ms u???
me: no beautiful girl said dis b4 n that 222 wid such deep emotions...
Pia: u neva leave a chance 2 impress me...
me: Hahahahahahaha.....
Pia: V r goin 2 Juhu beach in d eve...
me: Woooo...i,ve seen it in muviezzzz...
Pia: u cn cm wid us...
me: kk...
me: lv ur humour dear...
Mannu easily surrendered to her words.
Pia: Mannu...making music???
me: yup...i added 2 new songs...
Pia: u’re 1 of a kind...my COPY CAT...
me: dere are many music makers in ur city...
Pia: y not...bt i know only u...
me: thnx...n u say bout urself...
Pia: ooops...mum caling...ttyl
me: will v talk at 9??
Pia: yup...if Zenin hasn’t called u 4 dinner....
me: ohhhh...
Pia: just kidding...bye dear...ms u tc...
me: byeee..njoy lots...n i ms u 222...
Pia: hw cm u’r onlyn???
me: jst 4 some questionnaires...
Pia: kk...how r STUDIES goin on???
me: f9...jst 2 mnths 4 boards n 3 for the BIGGER EXAMS...
Pia: ok...So sm BIG plans I guess...
me: hmmmm...smthng BIG n GOOD...
me: u no wat...
Pia: ??
me: I wuz w8ng 2 c u ol...
Pia: Oh!! dnt lie...
me: Really...I alwaz do w8 2 c u ol...
Pia: Mannuuu...
me: it feels gud 2 talk 2 u yaar...
Pia: mmmmmm hmmmmmm....n what next???
me: n I ms u...
Pia: yaaaa...i 2 ms u yaar...
me: Really!!!
Pia: yup...wats so surprising???cnt i ms u???
me: no beautiful girl said dis b4 n that 222 wid such deep emotions...
Pia: u neva leave a chance 2 impress me...
me: Hahahahahahaha.....
Pia: V r goin 2 Juhu beach in d eve...
me: Woooo...i,ve seen it in muviezzzz...
Pia: u cn cm wid us...
me: kk...
me: lv ur humour dear...
Mannu easily surrendered to her words.
Pia: Mannu...making music???
me: yup...i added 2 new songs...
Pia: u’re 1 of a kind...my COPY CAT...
me: dere are many music makers in ur city...
Pia: y not...bt i know only u...
me: thnx...n u say bout urself...
Pia: ooops...mum caling...ttyl
me: will v talk at 9??
Pia: yup...if Zenin hasn’t called u 4 dinner....
me: ohhhh...
Pia: just kidding...bye dear...ms u tc...
me: byeee..njoy lots...n i ms u 222...
Mannu had got a new job
now. His thoughts and imageries had found a new highway. Mumbai was coming
alive through the eyes of Pia. He started to scrutinize the internet for images
of Juhu beach. A boy must be aware of the entire thick and thins to be the
cause of smile on a girl’s face. And when she asks him ’How do you know?’ he
should, looking straight into her eyes, say calmly ‘I just know.’
me: Hiii...
Pia: Heya...hiizzzz....
me: tired??
Pia: yyyuuppp...
me: how wuz ur tym??
Pia: gud...v wr back at 8...
me: Zenin didn’t call me 2day...
Pia: hw cm??
me: Y do u hate her??
Pia: Hellooo...i dnt hate her...
me: u frown when her name comes...
Pia: nowaz...c my smile eeeeeee
me: ok...relax dear..
Mannu couldn’t move a step ahead after dear.
me: tell me about Juhu...
Pia: u know Mannu..its beauty is more than a camera can capture...
me: u tuk photos???
me: wat else...
Pia: yup..
Pia: u no wat i feel bout dat place...Sit with ur lover on a log under the blue sky...share green and red ice slushes...nuthng can b colourful dan dat... N u hear nuthng except the rustle of the waves and the voice of ur lover..nuthng soulful dan dat...
Pia: rite na Mannu??
Pia: Heya...hiizzzz....
me: tired??
Pia: yyyuuppp...
me: how wuz ur tym??
Pia: gud...v wr back at 8...
me: Zenin didn’t call me 2day...
Pia: hw cm??
me: Y do u hate her??
Pia: Hellooo...i dnt hate her...
me: u frown when her name comes...
Pia: nowaz...c my smile eeeeeee
me: ok...relax dear..
Mannu couldn’t move a step ahead after dear.
me: tell me about Juhu...
Pia: u know Mannu..its beauty is more than a camera can capture...
me: u tuk photos???
me: wat else...
Pia: yup..
Pia: u no wat i feel bout dat place...Sit with ur lover on a log under the blue sky...share green and red ice slushes...nuthng can b colourful dan dat... N u hear nuthng except the rustle of the waves and the voice of ur lover..nuthng soulful dan dat...
Pia: rite na Mannu??
Mannu was numb for
moments. His half an hour image search and smartness, both proved futile. He
felt embarrassed at the thorough, yet fake, efforts he was making to impress
her. He sipped a glass of water. For a second he felt to end the chat. He was
unable to face the purity of Pia’s character. It was striking him straight at
his heart. There are certain things in life which look more beautiful when seen
through beautiful eyes and a love filled heart. She told him the true meaning
of togetherness.
me: Rite...
Pia: It’s my dream to be dere wid my lover...
me: I pray that day comes soon...
Pia: g2g 4 supper...
Pia: c u 2mrow at 9...
me: n wat about noon???
Pia: n wat bout ur studies???
me: i’ll finish it b4 1..
Pia: Sure??/
me: yaaa...i’ll wake up early...
Pia: ok...ok...ok...
Pia: byeee 4 nw...gd nyt...miss uuuu...
me: byee..miss u more...gud nyt...
Pia: It’s my dream to be dere wid my lover...
me: I pray that day comes soon...
Pia: g2g 4 supper...
Pia: c u 2mrow at 9...
me: n wat about noon???
Pia: n wat bout ur studies???
me: i’ll finish it b4 1..
Pia: Sure??/
me: yaaa...i’ll wake up early...
Pia: ok...ok...ok...
Pia: byeee 4 nw...gd nyt...miss uuuu...
me: byee..miss u more...gud nyt...
Her presence in Mannu’s life had become vital. They had started sharing
photos, hundreds of scraps, ideas and even passwords. You become closer to the
person you share your password with. Passwords really have that strength. The
need for a web camera was steadily rising, but both of them didn’t have even
one. Rarely does it happen that no one is able to fulfil all our likes, not
even God.
Pia had became familiar
with every activity of Mannu. She had posted two kisses and a love u. ‘I’ was
still missing. Once on YM, Mannu changed the IM environment with falling hearts
which she changed moments later, but it appeared to Mannu that it had made a
space somewhere at the back of her heart and she changed it deliberately in an
urge of shyness. She could not confirm to her feelings yet. There had to be some
distance yet, created although, but it had to remain somewhere besides both of
them especially besides Pia. She had never been alone. Friends were her
saviours in all the moments. Avi’s chats with Pia had lessened and she dare not
discuss about Mannu with her college colleagues, not even with those who
gossiped in the apartment premises on nippy evenings. She said that it didnn’t
work there. Her friends would have made fun of her, called her a girl of 90’s.
It was an old sort of romance, if there was any, and in the ultra modern city
of Mumbai this style had lived its life. Or was it so new that people won’t
understand? These doubts kept Pia to herself when it came to Mannu.
The calendar showed the
month of love, February. The 13th day was the day of school farewell. Mannu had
thought of this day once or twice at the beginning of the session, but today he
was completely dipped in drops of nostalgia. In a white silk shirt, pair of
blue cowboy jeans whose colour resembled the stratus clouds and a algal blue coloured
silk neck scarf, which he had borrowed from his cousin, filled him with
panache. The farewell was a much awaited event among the students of class
12th. They had expected it to be much better than they had offered to their
seniors. But when the day had finally arrived, deep down in their hearts they
were sad within their smiles, blushes and chatter. Probably it was Mannu’s last
trip to school on his Discover 125. He drove to the school premises once,
checked the happenings, and came back to Hazratganj. Every chance of driving
the bike was being used. Amit and other guys from the grey team were also
roaming around from school to Hazratganj in groups. Sukkhi and Yash, fit from
the New Year incident were now active members of that group. They were having
the privilege of roaming on bikes, free from all the duties that the students
of Class 11th performed to give a good end to the farewell, definitely a good
start, with their seniors. It was because Amit was their leader. Anyone who was
with him was free from all the fears and beating of the PTI.
Avi had not arrived
yet. Mannu knew it. It was said among the girls that today she was going to
give something to Mannu. Many made a prophecy that this separation was going to
bring them closer again and she was going to propose Mannu. Some believed that
she may ask him for a ride and make out all the differences, but this
possibility dimmed as she was nowhere to be seen and the official timing for
the farewell to begin was just half an hour ahead. And talks, of completely
different orientation, were talked among the boys too, that she was going to
meet Mannu and Amit together and ask Amit for a ride. All in front of the eyes
of Mannu! And she would do it not for the sake of revenge, but the saying went
as far that she had developed a relation of sort with Amit that made a bike
ride a very casual affair. Mannu was unable to restrain himself from these
thoughts. After all he was young and these gossips really had the strength to
change things within him. Trying not to think what was to follow, he left for
Chotelal mithaiwala and called Vivi. However, mobile phones were not allowed in
the school campus, but today were different. The whole night they had planned
their activities from the start to the end of the day, but Vivi was late. Till
he showed up Mannu had had his part of soft drinks and kebab rolls, watching
Sukkhi and others doing the same old stunt again and again and again.
“Hey Mannu...I’m sorry. Actually some girls caught me up...”He said looking in the rear view mirror of his borrowed bike and settling his brown and black hairs. Black was the natural colour.
“Oh really... Didn’t they ask anything about me?”Mannu asked him, in a mood so melancholic that it seemed these words were not spoken by him.
“Hey Mannu...I’m sorry. Actually some girls caught me up...”He said looking in the rear view mirror of his borrowed bike and settling his brown and black hairs. Black was the natural colour.
“Oh really... Didn’t they ask anything about me?”Mannu asked him, in a mood so melancholic that it seemed these words were not spoken by him.
‘No... They were asking
about Amit.” He said, smiling on Mannu as he frowned.
“Leave it... Tell me
how am I looking today?”Vivi asked him positioning him in front of Mannu’s
eyes. The stunts continued. A car had also passed by and Mannu thought that he
saw Avi. Vivi wore a white shirt too which covered his protruding stomach, pair
of blue jeans and a black neck scarf. The only thing that pinched Mannu’s eyes
was the red pimple on his face. But how could he say it looked bad?
“You’re looking just
like me Vivi.” The smile on his face was much broader than the one Mannu had
always seen.
“Let’s move...”Mannu
said. Quickly they ate that last packet of jalebis together, wished a Namaste
to Chotelal and reassured him that he made the tastiest jalebis and they were
off.
“Hum kisi din fir aayenge, we’ll come again someday.”Mannu shouted at his
back. That day they ate for free.
And then they were all back to the school. A hoarding
was placed outside the gates to welcome the last year students. It was an
impressive gesture by the juniors. Chit chat started that the juniors had
worked quite well to arrange a memorable farewell as well as the collection, in
terms of money, has been good too as without a decent collection how was all
this possible? The pathway to the auditorium had been decorated with posters,
multi-coloured strips, rangolis and graffiti’s. The bikes and the cars added
much aura to its beauty. It was the last chance for all to showcase their
father’s money and even some of his belongings which included the cars that stood
disoriented on the sides of the pathway. The weather was pleasant. It was
wintery and the sun provided precise warmth to keep the groove among all. Girls
were dressed in a saree rather in their mom’s saree as Zenin had told Mannu.
Most of them were busy checking and positioning the neck and the shoulders of
their back laced blouses with a confusion laden smile on their extra red lips,
pertaining to show that they were comfortable in a saree. They were standing
near the auditorium gates, busy earning accolades and blessings from the
teachers, but as the boys arrived all the eyes started searching their partner.
The mic testing was on the go. And the noise served a perfect purpose to hide
the anxiety that pounded in the young hearts. Girls had already filled up their
quota of clicks with teachers and the boys, most of them, thought to finish
this task soon and occupy seats. Students, like bees, surrounded their
favourite teachers. But it seemed that all of them had become favourites. The
separation that was coming had ended all the differences and complaints. The
teachers also showed much respect for the students which had never been
experienced before. A new being was brought out within all.
The announcement had been made for the arrival of the principal. Everbody was asked to be seated. The juniors had done a big favour. After multiple requests and assurance Mr. Sharma had agreed that the girls and boys could sit in mix rows. To be more specific the arrangement allowed the final year students to choose their sitting partners, one with whom they shared something. It also served a way to express oneself. Mannu again took a back seat. Zenin was with Vivi. Yes, Avi was with Amit. Eyes were looking back again and again at Mannu as if demanding a confirmation about Avi’s new realtion. Mannu had seen a lot within these minutes. Amit had grasped Avi’s palm, not so delicately as Mannu would have done it, but she didn’t hesitate, didn’t refuse. She was not completely out of Mannu’s mind. He could not stop looking at them again and more he saw them more he found them near. To escape, he shifted further back where the singles were parting, free from any restriction. They had brought in their soft drinks and the juniors, without any confrontation, had served them the plastic glasses.
The performances began with a Saraswati Vandana which was a custom. No one seemed interested except the teachers. Boys and girls were busy on their sides. The refreshment had been served and the singles were busy in making themselves stuffed with the paties, pastries and wafers. The juniors could not restrict the serving of soft drink to one serve per person. Without any instrument accompanying the song, chorus seemed very boring. Even the singers knew that they weren’t being heard now. Some had even stopped singing, but as a custom again, the Vandana had to be finished. As the song finished everyone turned to the front and clapped with full vigour. The claps were in a very high proportion seeing the level of performance. It was clear that these claps were more an appreciation of the seating arrangement, rather than the Vandana. And they busied themselves again on their sides. Eyes were still turning back at Avi and Amit and then towards Mannu who found a safe hiding in eating and sharing high fives on non sense jokes. The mic was checked again. Mr. Sharma was coming for speech. He was greeted with hoots and claps. Today he also walked in an attitude dipped in youth.
The announcement had been made for the arrival of the principal. Everbody was asked to be seated. The juniors had done a big favour. After multiple requests and assurance Mr. Sharma had agreed that the girls and boys could sit in mix rows. To be more specific the arrangement allowed the final year students to choose their sitting partners, one with whom they shared something. It also served a way to express oneself. Mannu again took a back seat. Zenin was with Vivi. Yes, Avi was with Amit. Eyes were looking back again and again at Mannu as if demanding a confirmation about Avi’s new realtion. Mannu had seen a lot within these minutes. Amit had grasped Avi’s palm, not so delicately as Mannu would have done it, but she didn’t hesitate, didn’t refuse. She was not completely out of Mannu’s mind. He could not stop looking at them again and more he saw them more he found them near. To escape, he shifted further back where the singles were parting, free from any restriction. They had brought in their soft drinks and the juniors, without any confrontation, had served them the plastic glasses.
The performances began with a Saraswati Vandana which was a custom. No one seemed interested except the teachers. Boys and girls were busy on their sides. The refreshment had been served and the singles were busy in making themselves stuffed with the paties, pastries and wafers. The juniors could not restrict the serving of soft drink to one serve per person. Without any instrument accompanying the song, chorus seemed very boring. Even the singers knew that they weren’t being heard now. Some had even stopped singing, but as a custom again, the Vandana had to be finished. As the song finished everyone turned to the front and clapped with full vigour. The claps were in a very high proportion seeing the level of performance. It was clear that these claps were more an appreciation of the seating arrangement, rather than the Vandana. And they busied themselves again on their sides. Eyes were still turning back at Avi and Amit and then towards Mannu who found a safe hiding in eating and sharing high fives on non sense jokes. The mic was checked again. Mr. Sharma was coming for speech. He was greeted with hoots and claps. Today he also walked in an attitude dipped in youth.
He began with a Namaste
unlike the daily assembly speech he gave. He cleared his throat as usual and
waited for everyone to sit. Plates were kept aside and the students sat
straight as if reacting to the attention command.
“Kids or shall I say
guys and girls?” and there was a roar of laughter, claps whistles and hoots. No
one had seen this Mr. Sharma before. Not even once.”Some days are very special
in our lives. You know kids why?” he paused for a while and then continued “
because they don’t repeat themselves. They only come once and forever in our
lives. And one such day in today! You are about to cross a threshold in life
which will never come to you again. There will only be a memory, sweet or sad,
Well it is upto you. I don’t clearly remember my day of school farewell. It was
not made so special. It was very ordinary. In our times the focus was on the
study part.” And while saying this he made gestures towards the senior
teachers. They nodded in assurance and remembrance. ”but times have changed. I
feel I could be a kid again, celebrate this day like you. Aaah that’s an old
story. But I can remember what my principal told me on the last day. Are you
all interested to know it?” and there was a huge roar of yes. Students even
stood up on their toes and clapped with hands held high. It was a different
person who was speaking today. Soft, emotional, just like a father who was
gravely sad to leave his children.”Ok Ok sit down, sit down. I can’t shout much
today.”
Everyone obeyed. He
asked for a glass of water to be placed by his side. “So...my principal told
me...Sharma...yes he used to call me Sharma...that never forget your roots. Run
in life, don’t walk, but don’t stop to take a rest. Have a look around you and
then move ahead, again. And chase the essential in life. It is very important
to know what really the essential is. That you will have to understand and look
for. That would be your journey. You will always be confronted with questions.
You will have to choose which to answer and what to answer. Are you getting my
point kids? This is all I would say today. N yes...never forget your roots.
Take care. I wish you success, good health and happiness.” And silence
followed. Everyone was numb by his words. He didn’t give a chance to think
anything else and what he spoke caught the hearts of the students as well as
the teachers. After a few seconds teachers stood up and clapped gently for him.
The students followed. To lighten the moment the next performance was started
which was a play written by class 11th students. It was a mimicry act and the
characters performed the role of their seniors. Teachers were also imitated.
Avi was shown surrounded by roses and their sender’s name was always missing.
Mannu was shown writing poetry in P&F and Vivi was the uninterested
listener. After that the titles were distributed and in a short while the students
dashed on to the dance floor. A photographer was arranged and the teachers
distributed the admit cards with a photograph of that special moment which was
provided to the student immediately and free of cost. Some students even
touched the feet of the teachers. Bollywood songs and psychedelic music grooved
their minds and the danced until they were out of breath. Zenin was still with
Vivi as were others with their seat partners, planning hard to be their life
partner. She always said that she wanted a boyfriend just like Mannu. He
clearly knew what that meant. But he believed in being a lover rather than a
boyfriend. So, she just repeated those old lines and never dared to move a step
forward for a deeper relation with Mannu. The pre board topper still cleared
doubts of juniors and batch mates on how to score well in board and clear
engineering exams, even the IIT JEE, in parallel. She said that it was easy if
one planned for it. As she was explaining the significance of pre- boards, her
lecture was cut short as the avid listeners were pushed on to the dance floor
by their colleagues. By this time the sun had settled. Among all this the
exhibition cricket match between the grey and the blue teams had been missed,
but no one cared.
It was almost 7. The
party could not be extended beyond this. Vivi and Mannu went back to the class
and saw the last row benches where we sat the whole year long. They discussed
how they used to finish off the lunch and how they cheated the answers.
Everyone was having a last look at their favorite spots. Mannu and Vivi went to
their favorite bunk spots. Mannu didn’t have any word to say and nothing to
read like yesterdays. All he did was stood still and smiled in a sweet
remembrance. Most of the things that had added colours in his life were turning
black. He couldn’t stand too long at all those places where he had spent hours
and years. His heart went dizzy and he typed a message to her who never let him
feel lonely.
‘Hey Pia...i dnt no
wats hapning...bt m msng u...’His cell phone beeped the very next moment. ‘I
unstand u’ll ms ur school days...it happens...nw smile my cutie pie...i’ll b
dere at 9...dun wry...’and he smiled. Her words had given him the courage to
face and accept the unchangeable.
Finally, it was the
time to go. Girls’ hugged girls and boys hugged boys! Permission for this
exchange was not granted. Mannu hugged Vivi. Both spoke nothing. Again everyone
clicked photos, exchanged gifts and Mannu was just standing down and watching
others. Some love stories ended hours before the Valentine’s Day whereas some
hands were still together.
No one would have reached the school if the farewell was scheduled
tomorrow. Vivi clapped hands on Mannu’s thoughts. Almost everybody had left.
Avi looked at Mannu once and left with her group. She didn’t even come to say a
good bye.
There is not a single
moment in a man’s life when he has the answers to all his questions. Love for
Mannu was getting more fascinating than Physics and Maths. Mannu was
approaching more possibilities on this subject of heart. There was only one
name whose wishes he needed, but it was still lost in the vastness of these
clouds. And the one name that had some proximity with his had walked away
yesterday, clearing all the thin air of doubt that existed.
“Mannu...didn’t anyone
call you today?”Mrs. K asked him engaged partially in slicing vegetables for
lunch. The school had been over.
“Strange question mummy...What’s so special today?”
“Valentine’s day...Don’t you know that?’
“Hmmmmm...I know. No one called me...yet.”Mannu spoke moving towards the bathroom. Mrs. K was still smiling with her eyes on Mannu.
“Strange question mummy...What’s so special today?”
“Valentine’s day...Don’t you know that?’
“Hmmmmm...I know. No one called me...yet.”Mannu spoke moving towards the bathroom. Mrs. K was still smiling with her eyes on Mannu.
Mannu couldn’t make out
why he was missing Pia and longing to hear something from her. She was not his
valentine, definitely. Oh! He couldn’t simplify the degree of confusion the
last word contained. Definitely, a probability existed which he had started to
fear. Had he really fallen for her? Had they moved along so much? In the dark,
locked bathroom, he stared in the mirror.
“No...It can’t be...I
can’t be in love with her.”He talked repeatedly to his reflection.
The day grew older to
give birth to noon. Mannu had not touched the cell phone since morning as any
confusion today would have created a pile of misunderstanding between him and
Mrs. K. And with the final exams so near the damage of trust would be
unfathomable. Somehow Mannu made an escape from her and dug the phone out from
underneath the pillow. Somebody had thought of him since morning. The cell
phone showed 3 Missed Calls/3 New Messages. Choices play a significant role in
our lives. We are mostly anxious to know the after effects of the one not
chosen. Isn’t it? Same happened with Mannu. Not too sure on what to check
first, he selected the missed calls as words for him were much worthy. The
missed calls were divided in two parts. Two from the one who cared and one from
the customer care. In disdain, Mannu closed his eyes and exhaled. He had lost
the chance to hear Pia’s voice. Well...It was not a good sign to start the day.
There was no probability that she would call again. Still he thought there was
a chance to make things better. With three moves on the keypad Mannu reached
the inbox.
I can’t sing a love
song,
or I would have sung it for you...
I can’t bring the moon down,
or I would have bought it for you.
I guess I’m only good enough
to say these words to you...
Happy Valentine’s Day.
or I would have sung it for you...
I can’t bring the moon down,
or I would have bought it for you.
I guess I’m only good enough
to say these words to you...
Happy Valentine’s Day.
There were still two
messages unread.
Hey Mannu...wake up my
cutie pie..luk @ d mrng so beautifull...cum on wake up naaaaa...
Ok...keep sleeping...tk cr...hav a gud day dear...
Pia was the only sender.
Ok...keep sleeping...tk cr...hav a gud day dear...
Pia was the only sender.
They were not lovers,
but there were many places Mannu’s mind had started travelling with their hands
together. Some sea beaches, some green gardens. It was a vague perception of
the wanderer within his soul.
Some head cells had started
arranging letters for a reply, loveatninemeandyou. He could clearly draw the
fact that the valentine wish was a poem of Pia. Now it was his turn to send his
first valentine wish on a phone and luckily the winds were in his favour.
No moon, no stars...
They are all too far.
I need a gentle touch, with an honest heart
Just to say...
Happy Valentine’s Day.
They are all too far.
I need a gentle touch, with an honest heart
Just to say...
Happy Valentine’s Day.
He guessed these words
made the right sense.
‘Hey Mannu...how’s the day...???’His cell phone beeped the next moment.
‘Itz goin f9...thnx 4 d wish...So hw many wishes u got today???’Mannu questioned just to know the answers to some unasked questions.
‘Itz u who wshd me...no 1 else...’
He was surprised, but happy enough to know that. It rarely happens in this lost big world these days.
‘I nevaa xpectd a wish 4m u...’
‘Y so Mannu...???Being wid u has taught me lots of Tehzeeb...hehehehehe...’She wrote in her next message.
‘That poem of urs wuz far better than mine...’Mannu replied. An intuition gave birth to a feeling that those words were originally hers.
‘Oh...cm on...but how cm u no I wrote it???’
‘This is the only answer I can’t find Pia...’He replied with a smile on my face.
‘U u u...flirting naaa...ok...allowed today...’Actually I was doing that so I said nothing in acceptance.
‘What a relation v hav Mannu..???It ain’t luv n it ain’t frndship...’Her message read. What else could he say instead of a yes with several ‘s’.
‘Hey Mannu...how’s the day...???’His cell phone beeped the next moment.
‘Itz goin f9...thnx 4 d wish...So hw many wishes u got today???’Mannu questioned just to know the answers to some unasked questions.
‘Itz u who wshd me...no 1 else...’
He was surprised, but happy enough to know that. It rarely happens in this lost big world these days.
‘I nevaa xpectd a wish 4m u...’
‘Y so Mannu...???Being wid u has taught me lots of Tehzeeb...hehehehehe...’She wrote in her next message.
‘That poem of urs wuz far better than mine...’Mannu replied. An intuition gave birth to a feeling that those words were originally hers.
‘Oh...cm on...but how cm u no I wrote it???’
‘This is the only answer I can’t find Pia...’He replied with a smile on my face.
‘U u u...flirting naaa...ok...allowed today...’Actually I was doing that so I said nothing in acceptance.
‘What a relation v hav Mannu..???It ain’t luv n it ain’t frndship...’Her message read. What else could he say instead of a yes with several ‘s’.
Change is the only
thing permanent in a man’s life. Mannu was drowned amid a storm of changes. No
doubt he had grown fonder for Pia. There was an ache somewhere at the back of
his heart which prompted him to think; ‘how could I fall in love with a girl
I’ve never seen and probably I’ll never see.’ He thought on it for a while,
sitting calm and serene in front of the PC, then he thought of God and thought
of his two words, life and love, which had their significance beyond time.
Life was on the verge of a 180 degree phase change. He was developing an intimacy for every creation of God, the moon, the stars, the clouds, the flowers and Pia. There was no definite time for a message chat. Sudden lv u from her just blew him away for moments. She gave him a new name every day. He was her cutie pie one day, honeybun the other morning, teddy and sugarplum in evenings and night. They planned the day’s schedule together and sometimes she even woke him up with her messages which were delivered on his cell phone till the late noon. Ultimately he had to agree on her words and wake up. Every third day the phone showed up ‘No Space For New Messages’. He kept on saving her messages for an unknown reason. They kept every other meeting clandestine and the only question that circulated within them throughout the chats was ‘What sort a relation we have’. But no one dared to ask.
The preparation for the final school exams had caught him up like a spider in its own web. The infinitely stretched integrals, the self evolving equations and the circumlocutory motion of the off destined virtual objects seized the light within me. He became silent at home, busy in a different world, even the online chats had been cut off due to the exams. Pia never retaliated. The pressure had started showing up on his face, beneath his eyes and in the nature of his smile. Awake whole night, a cup of coffee and a balance stuffed cell phone were two islands of escape. But it was used only to give miss call to Vivi, a few to Zenin to keep them and himself awake and also to reduce the mounting stress. They say these sleepless nights will fetch you a sleep for the rest of your life. He never believed it completely as a boy in his 18 never knows about his next morning, so what could he say about the next month or the next year probably?
Amid all this game of books he was learning an art of developing a relationship, a responsibility. Pia’s concern was also one strange reason which kept him awake the whole night long.
Life was on the verge of a 180 degree phase change. He was developing an intimacy for every creation of God, the moon, the stars, the clouds, the flowers and Pia. There was no definite time for a message chat. Sudden lv u from her just blew him away for moments. She gave him a new name every day. He was her cutie pie one day, honeybun the other morning, teddy and sugarplum in evenings and night. They planned the day’s schedule together and sometimes she even woke him up with her messages which were delivered on his cell phone till the late noon. Ultimately he had to agree on her words and wake up. Every third day the phone showed up ‘No Space For New Messages’. He kept on saving her messages for an unknown reason. They kept every other meeting clandestine and the only question that circulated within them throughout the chats was ‘What sort a relation we have’. But no one dared to ask.
The preparation for the final school exams had caught him up like a spider in its own web. The infinitely stretched integrals, the self evolving equations and the circumlocutory motion of the off destined virtual objects seized the light within me. He became silent at home, busy in a different world, even the online chats had been cut off due to the exams. Pia never retaliated. The pressure had started showing up on his face, beneath his eyes and in the nature of his smile. Awake whole night, a cup of coffee and a balance stuffed cell phone were two islands of escape. But it was used only to give miss call to Vivi, a few to Zenin to keep them and himself awake and also to reduce the mounting stress. They say these sleepless nights will fetch you a sleep for the rest of your life. He never believed it completely as a boy in his 18 never knows about his next morning, so what could he say about the next month or the next year probably?
Amid all this game of books he was learning an art of developing a relationship, a responsibility. Pia’s concern was also one strange reason which kept him awake the whole night long.
“Why does she care so
much about me?”
“What keeps her awake all night?”
“Does she love me?”
“Do I love her?”
“What keeps her awake all night?”
“Does she love me?”
“Do I love her?”
He questioned himself during breaks, during the time the coffee came to a
boil and even when he switched among Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics and
poetry.
“Dheere chaliye, drive
slow uncle, I’ve studied nothing...”A guy from the bus shouted. Fortunes had
been made and the day of reckoning had arrived. It was a harsh fact that the
board which taught all to read and write could panic our lives one day! Mannu
was sitting on the last seat of the bus just like a reckless coon unaware of
the paradise the winds would take him. Vivi sat next to him reciting formulae
just as if he was reciting some sacred prayers. Heads bowed down before every
mandir that passed through their way. It’s a human sign, when things go wrong
one’s belief in God raises ten folds. Mannu was living on the words of Rahim
das. “Remember God in moments of joy, why will sadness touch you.”
Vivi had troubled Mannu
the whole night long. They had a conversation on strength and weakness in
Physics. They discussed on the minimum passing marks and the maximum they
expected.
“Yaar now it’s a matter
of those 3 hours...Jo hoga dekha jaega...” these were the words for
consolation. This happened not once, not twice, but the count was between 33
and 100. Kinematics, limits, bonds all flowed in Mannu’s head. It was not ok
because all flowed past at the same time! It isn’t a part of memory but it was
the strike of confusion within him. The night before the first board exam
mesmerized him with its enigma. He even woke up thrice to memorize theorems and
derivations, but Vivi never let him do so and very soon the morning grabbed them
by the wrist. As soon as he opened his unslept eyes the cell phone showed an
unread message. Who could it be except Pia with her good wishes?
The examination hall
was a ground for confusion, anxiety and solace. For very few among them it was
a place of confidence. The pre board topper was seen without any book in her
hand. She was sipping lemon juice and caressing her pug. Who was so lucky as
her? Even today couples got strength by revising notes together. Parents came
to drop their children. Some even waited outside their car which was
transformed to a learning place for their kid. They bore the heat and the
child, relaxed by the cool air from the A.C., gave a casual look at the notes.
The time was drifting away. There was so much yet to be revised by the average
students, but with the tick of the watch, which every candidate was wearing and
checking after seconds, the bell for the star of the exam rang. The bell for
the future of them rang.
Mannu, so like the other kids, performed all the rituals before starting. He took the name of the Almighty, thought of his parents, kissed the holy neck pendant and began to shape his future.
An outflow of mugged up facts compelled him to fill the empty answer sheet as I removed the nib cap from the pen.
Mannu, so like the other kids, performed all the rituals before starting. He took the name of the Almighty, thought of his parents, kissed the holy neck pendant and began to shape his future.
An outflow of mugged up facts compelled him to fill the empty answer sheet as I removed the nib cap from the pen.
Very soon the third
bell rang for the third time. Three papers had come to and end. He had already
spent nine busy hours on that bench with a hope that this all will end very
soon. At the exit gates, the scene was almost the same. Mannu and Vivi had
found an unnoticed corner which helped them to prick eyes on girl’s faces and
sometimes on their skirts. The separation between their eye lids was in reverse
proportion with the length of their skirts.
Some faces gloomed after their performance as unexpectedly they had performed better than their hopes. Strange...Isn’t it? Some were frowning with a hand on their waist and the other on their forehead as if they lost their life somewhere under the benches. The toppers had a different group, mostly girls, who sighed heavily on the thought that they expected 100, but will have to consent with 99. It was a clear fact that numerals were shaping their destiny. Beautiful faces needed a shoulder to cry on. The boys who owned them care not about their fail or pass percent, but silently they prayed to earn that last mark which was destined to be hers and she would rest her feather light face on his shoulder. Those 5 minutes of adolescence were much enchanting than the three hours in the classroom.
Some faces gloomed after their performance as unexpectedly they had performed better than their hopes. Strange...Isn’t it? Some were frowning with a hand on their waist and the other on their forehead as if they lost their life somewhere under the benches. The toppers had a different group, mostly girls, who sighed heavily on the thought that they expected 100, but will have to consent with 99. It was a clear fact that numerals were shaping their destiny. Beautiful faces needed a shoulder to cry on. The boys who owned them care not about their fail or pass percent, but silently they prayed to earn that last mark which was destined to be hers and she would rest her feather light face on his shoulder. Those 5 minutes of adolescence were much enchanting than the three hours in the classroom.
Silence was the only
thing audible except the engine and the horn sound of the bus. Vivi was sitting
sad and quiet. No girl saw him today. The sadness on his face reflected all he
hid in his heart.
“Come on cheer up Vivi...There’s always a next time.”
“Will you score above 90?”Vivi questioned.
“I guess I will...”Mannu replied patting him on the portion of his pants that covered his thigh.
“Ok leave it...Let’s dream...”Mannu said again.
“Yaaaaa...Hmmmmm...You know what Mannu...???”
“What?”
“Come on cheer up Vivi...There’s always a next time.”
“Will you score above 90?”Vivi questioned.
“I guess I will...”Mannu replied patting him on the portion of his pants that covered his thigh.
“Ok leave it...Let’s dream...”Mannu said again.
“Yaaaaa...Hmmmmm...You know what Mannu...???”
“What?”
“It’s good to see you
at the top, but not from the bottom.”Vivi said staring Mannu with innocence in
his black little eyes. Mannu said nothing. He knew that words won’t work here.
What had to be done had been done. Mannu knew within him that he too had missed
a mark. He could have done better. He closed his eyes and dreamt. After every
answer that he wrote in his copy he thought of her for moments and began with
the next one. Every move he made, he told her. Still he could not make out why
she spent sleepless nights just to awaken him at 3 or 4 am or whenever he ordered
her. Requests evolved to be orders. Messages oriented to alarms.
‘Wake up baby...itz a
beautiful morning saying Goooooodddd morning Manuu...’
‘Wake up baby...the sun wants to c u...go n say him a HELLO’
If alarms would have been so soothing, the whole world would get punctual. Isn’t it?
If alarms would have been so soothing, the whole world would get punctual. Isn’t it?
“How can I start loving
her for all she had done? Love does not happen this way Mannu. No Mannu...these
are signs of good friendship nothing else...”He narrated these words several
times in soliloquy.
If someone says you’re
good, do you start loving her?
If someone wakes you up, do you start loving her?
If someone smiles when you smile, do you start loving her?
Do you start loving someone whom you’ve never seen, never heard?
If someone wakes you up, do you start loving her?
If someone smiles when you smile, do you start loving her?
Do you start loving someone whom you’ve never seen, never heard?
Without an answer to
these questions he stepped out of the bus, meters away from the stop. It seemed
the examinations were secondary to him. The future was going to be decided by
answers to these strange questions. And the answers were not coming forth.
Courage to step forward and ask them was missing, at both the sides. But they
were also interfering with the academic future of Mannu. No one at home knew
the inside of him. All would be revealed on the day of results. His only answer
to Mr. and Mrs. K about his performance was “fine”, spoken in an uninterested
manner, because it was a partial truth. It was unlike Mannu.
Mrs. K served him with
more glasses of juices and milk and two bowls each of cashews and almonds. What
else could she do?
She stood beside him awakened from her sleep with the same question.
She stood beside him awakened from her sleep with the same question.
“Are you comfortable?”
“Are you able to solve them?”
“Do you need anything else beta?”
“Are you able to solve them?”
“Do you need anything else beta?”
These three questions
framed a single query of hers. She was worried for the boards more so for the
Engineering Entrance exams. Mannu was struggling hard to find a good way among
the lacs of engineers being manufactured. Just like any second Indian boy, he
too aspired to get admitted to the best institute. Every acquaintance, every
relative rather every face who saw him questioned not about his well being, but
reconciled with one universal thought
”Ghabrao mat...achcha college mil jayega, Don’t worry you’ll get admission in a good college.”
On Monday they’d ask him about the date of examination and from Wednesday or most lately by Thursday, they gave him a bunch of advice wrapped up with a token of counselling just like bougainvilleas in a bouquet of roses. Someone advised for a Mcgraw Hill, some said nothing better than monthly magazines, some told him about the strength of sample papers and the others said whatever came in their minds. His whole world was creeping up to a land with less oxygen and more engineers!
”Ghabrao mat...achcha college mil jayega, Don’t worry you’ll get admission in a good college.”
On Monday they’d ask him about the date of examination and from Wednesday or most lately by Thursday, they gave him a bunch of advice wrapped up with a token of counselling just like bougainvilleas in a bouquet of roses. Someone advised for a Mcgraw Hill, some said nothing better than monthly magazines, some told him about the strength of sample papers and the others said whatever came in their minds. His whole world was creeping up to a land with less oxygen and more engineers!
Since the end of March the change within Mannu had overwhelmed. As he
looked up towards the skies he didn’t see the clouds, but pulleys hanging down till
the earth. If he opened the tap to wash his face, he never felt water touching
his hands, but immediately he started applying equations and laws to the flow
of water with a hope to find an answer to the unsolved questions that proved
him an underdog. He could no longer sit and stare at nature as laws, numerous
laws covered the part of his head where his imagination lived. Mannu was
feeling afraid. There was no one with whom he could share a part of him. There
was none he could talk about love, songs, clouds and life. And the hope that
was building up among the family and relatives was mounting up to be a
dangerous thing. No one bothered about Mannu’s desires. Neighbors gave him
references of Mr. Black and Mr. White whose sons or daughters were engineers
from IIT’s, NIT’s and other pioneer colleges. All he could do was smile and
stare them with one notion “Achcha hai, its good.” A sense of local competition
had developed between uncles and aunts whose genes inherited children were to
give the engineering competition the next month. Aunts had started guessing the
name of the colony topper according to their biased statistics and analysis.
Guddi was given a secret job to know the whereabouts of the kids at different
houses. She didn’t want to say anything about this new job, but it came out
through her actions. She would put the blame on F block ladies when she mopped
the houses in E block and vice versa. The ladies and some of the gents, who
usually stayed at home or had retired, of the neighborhood had got a clear
understanding that they all were being watched, more so their kids. It served
as a boon to Guddi. For a month, in a few houses even more than that, she was
spared from cleaning the kid’s study and their bed room.
And the flow of admit
cards began. The postman had become aware of Mannu’s present life.
“Padhiye sahib...humare naseeb me padhai kahan, Study hard sahib...Studying wasn’t in my destiny.”
“Aapke bacche to padhte hain na?”Mrs. K asked him as she brought in the envelope. She meant to console him to stop repenting about his less educated past. That moment served a quantum of inspiration that urged Mannu to sit again for studies. A complete survey was performed by Channu and Mr. K on the phone to clear out the details of the examination centre. Channu laughed a lot at the photograph. Mrs. K couldn’t resist her smile too. Away from this lifeless living was a world of shelter, his virtual world. In the 24 hour day of the real world these were the moments which stole a smile for him. After every two hours there was an unread message in the inbox saying ‘Tell me wen 2 cm ol...I’ll b dere’. Mannu was still a bit hesitant to reply her the time of meeting.
“Padhiye sahib...humare naseeb me padhai kahan, Study hard sahib...Studying wasn’t in my destiny.”
“Aapke bacche to padhte hain na?”Mrs. K asked him as she brought in the envelope. She meant to console him to stop repenting about his less educated past. That moment served a quantum of inspiration that urged Mannu to sit again for studies. A complete survey was performed by Channu and Mr. K on the phone to clear out the details of the examination centre. Channu laughed a lot at the photograph. Mrs. K couldn’t resist her smile too. Away from this lifeless living was a world of shelter, his virtual world. In the 24 hour day of the real world these were the moments which stole a smile for him. After every two hours there was an unread message in the inbox saying ‘Tell me wen 2 cm ol...I’ll b dere’. Mannu was still a bit hesitant to reply her the time of meeting.
1st April
..............
me: i wuz w8n 4 u...u r 10 mins late..
Pia: Sryyyyyy...wuz a bit busyyyyyy...
me: y???
Pia: I had gone 2 d letter BoX near by...
me: woooo...
me: addressed 2...???
Pia: Dont u no dat my sweet bear???
me: naaaaa....
Pia: I won’t tell u...keep guessing
Mannu sent his crying specimen in the form of smileys.
Pia: Ooooooo....SSSsssshhh...
me: den tell me quick..
Pia: Uuuuffff...the postman restrained me from posting it...
me: wat???but y???
Pia: He 2 wuz an idiot lyk u..dats y...
me: Piaaa....
me: wat was it???
Pia: Leave it yaar...
me: how dare d postman do so...???
me: if i wud hav been dere...
Pia: Relax..relax..
Pia: Leave it...the story ends...
me: ................
me: ...........
me: ???????????//////////
me: ????
me: ???
me: ??
me: ?
He stopped for a while, but still there was no reply.
me: ??????/////////////?????????////
Pia: Uuuuuuffffff....stop...stop..stoooopppp
Pia: It wuz a love letter...
me: Ooooooo...
me: who is dat guy???u neva told me...nt fair Pia..
Mannu typed with a choked throat and a sweat bathed forehead. He prayed silently, cursing God for all he had seen on the monitor. If this was true it meant that God didn’t exist. But some realities fade away as misconceptions with time.
Pia: Hehehehehehehe.....
She replied with some smiley’s which conveyed SMILES.
me: nw wat???
me: wont u tell me his name???
Pia: its u my honeybun...my sugarpie...
He turned 360 degrees thrice on the revolving chair, but I pretended as if it hurt me.
me: y didn’t u post it???n plzz don’t surprise me now...i can’t bear these surprises with exams coming by...
Pia: No LOVE LETTERS can b posted 2day...today is not a LOVER’S DAY...n cum on b brave...
me: den wats so different 2day???
Pia: Caught u again...WISH U A HAPPY APRIL FOOOL’S DAY....hahahahahaha....
He wiped the sweat off his forehead and the moustache yard.
me: Piaaaa...dis wuz nt gud..nt gud at all...
Pia: Soooo...Sooooo...Soooooooooo...sorry..dere wuz no 1 else to fool like my cutie...
Pia: MuMumuMuMuaaahhhh...lv u..lv u...lv u..
Pia: Angry kyaaa???
Pia: ????
Pia: ???
Pia: ??
me: no m nt angry...
Pia: Cm near me...cum..cum..cum...
Mannu shifted his head near the monitor with the left cheek protruding out. Mrs. K was nowhere.
Pia: Mumuaahh...
Pia: U r so innocent...
me: hmmmm...
Pia: Mannuuu...nw say something...Wat u did 2day???
me: waited 4 ur letter...
Pia: Msorry...4give me plzzzzzz...
me: ok..4given..hav 2 leave...c d clock...
Pia: Bbyeee tk cr,,,,study hard....4give me plzz...sorry agaim....
me: hmmmmm..mmmm..u 2 tc..study hard..
Pia: Bbyeeee...
me: byeee..
Pia: byeeeee...
me: nw b offlyn...
Pia: C u 2mrow @ 9...
me: ok..bbyeee...n change ur pic plzzz..
..............
me: i wuz w8n 4 u...u r 10 mins late..
Pia: Sryyyyyy...wuz a bit busyyyyyy...
me: y???
Pia: I had gone 2 d letter BoX near by...
me: woooo...
me: addressed 2...???
Pia: Dont u no dat my sweet bear???
me: naaaaa....
Pia: I won’t tell u...keep guessing
Mannu sent his crying specimen in the form of smileys.
Pia: Ooooooo....SSSsssshhh...
me: den tell me quick..
Pia: Uuuuffff...the postman restrained me from posting it...
me: wat???but y???
Pia: He 2 wuz an idiot lyk u..dats y...
me: Piaaa....
me: wat was it???
Pia: Leave it yaar...
me: how dare d postman do so...???
me: if i wud hav been dere...
Pia: Relax..relax..
Pia: Leave it...the story ends...
me: ................
me: ...........
me: ???????????//////////
me: ????
me: ???
me: ??
me: ?
He stopped for a while, but still there was no reply.
me: ??????/////////////?????????////
Pia: Uuuuuuffffff....stop...stop..stoooopppp
Pia: It wuz a love letter...
me: Ooooooo...
me: who is dat guy???u neva told me...nt fair Pia..
Mannu typed with a choked throat and a sweat bathed forehead. He prayed silently, cursing God for all he had seen on the monitor. If this was true it meant that God didn’t exist. But some realities fade away as misconceptions with time.
Pia: Hehehehehehehe.....
She replied with some smiley’s which conveyed SMILES.
me: nw wat???
me: wont u tell me his name???
Pia: its u my honeybun...my sugarpie...
He turned 360 degrees thrice on the revolving chair, but I pretended as if it hurt me.
me: y didn’t u post it???n plzz don’t surprise me now...i can’t bear these surprises with exams coming by...
Pia: No LOVE LETTERS can b posted 2day...today is not a LOVER’S DAY...n cum on b brave...
me: den wats so different 2day???
Pia: Caught u again...WISH U A HAPPY APRIL FOOOL’S DAY....hahahahahaha....
He wiped the sweat off his forehead and the moustache yard.
me: Piaaaa...dis wuz nt gud..nt gud at all...
Pia: Soooo...Sooooo...Soooooooooo...sorry..dere wuz no 1 else to fool like my cutie...
Pia: MuMumuMuMuaaahhhh...lv u..lv u...lv u..
Pia: Angry kyaaa???
Pia: ????
Pia: ???
Pia: ??
me: no m nt angry...
Pia: Cm near me...cum..cum..cum...
Mannu shifted his head near the monitor with the left cheek protruding out. Mrs. K was nowhere.
Pia: Mumuaahh...
Pia: U r so innocent...
me: hmmmm...
Pia: Mannuuu...nw say something...Wat u did 2day???
me: waited 4 ur letter...
Pia: Msorry...4give me plzzzzzz...
me: ok..4given..hav 2 leave...c d clock...
Pia: Bbyeee tk cr,,,,study hard....4give me plzz...sorry agaim....
me: hmmmmm..mmmm..u 2 tc..study hard..
Pia: Bbyeeee...
me: byeee..
Pia: byeeeee...
me: nw b offlyn...
Pia: C u 2mrow @ 9...
me: ok..bbyeee...n change ur pic plzzz..
2nd April
me: hiiiii...
Pia: Hiiieee...
me: this is another gorgeous pic...lovely
Pia: Thanx...
me: u alwaz luk beautiful in green..
Pia: Hmmm...
me: n whr’s this place???
Pia: Itz Gangtol...
Pia: ***Gangtok
me: oh...itz heaven...
Pia: Yaaaa....
Pia: The place of mountains and yaks...
me: i’ve been 2 dat place...
Pia: Cool...
Pia: Did u c d Changu lake???
me: yaaa...the skies and d lake were snow filled...
me: Pia... i want 2 go dere once again...far away 4m here...
Pia: Naaa..na..study hard...n i’ll solve every other problem..muah..
me: tjanx...thanx a lot
me: find a girl whom i can love...
Pia: Yaaa...
me: hw many thanx shall I say 2 u???thanx
Pia: Shut up..i’m not gonna do it 4 u...
me: wat happnd???
Mannu was smiling to himself as the trick had worked.
me: i wuz joking..
Pia: U say nethng..n at last u say it wuz a joke..hate u...
me: okk..i’ll neva do it again...promise..
me: sorry Pia..
Pia:F9..i’ll nt talk 2 u if u do dis agaim...
me: y???wats so bad in all i said???
Pia: ***again...
Pia: Wateve...but i’ll nt talk 2 u..
Pia: i m leaving...
me: Pia..wats dis???
Pia: Mum calling..m m nt angry...
me: okk..byeee...
Pia: bbyeeeeee...tk cr...gud nyt...hate u
Pia has logged out.
Pia: Hiiieee...
me: this is another gorgeous pic...lovely
Pia: Thanx...
me: u alwaz luk beautiful in green..
Pia: Hmmm...
me: n whr’s this place???
Pia: Itz Gangtol...
Pia: ***Gangtok
me: oh...itz heaven...
Pia: Yaaaa....
Pia: The place of mountains and yaks...
me: i’ve been 2 dat place...
Pia: Cool...
Pia: Did u c d Changu lake???
me: yaaa...the skies and d lake were snow filled...
me: Pia... i want 2 go dere once again...far away 4m here...
Pia: Naaa..na..study hard...n i’ll solve every other problem..muah..
me: tjanx...thanx a lot
me: find a girl whom i can love...
Pia: Yaaa...
me: hw many thanx shall I say 2 u???thanx
Pia: Shut up..i’m not gonna do it 4 u...
me: wat happnd???
Mannu was smiling to himself as the trick had worked.
me: i wuz joking..
Pia: U say nethng..n at last u say it wuz a joke..hate u...
me: okk..i’ll neva do it again...promise..
me: sorry Pia..
Pia:F9..i’ll nt talk 2 u if u do dis agaim...
me: y???wats so bad in all i said???
Pia: ***again...
Pia: Wateve...but i’ll nt talk 2 u..
Pia: i m leaving...
me: Pia..wats dis???
Pia: Mum calling..m m nt angry...
me: okk..byeee...
Pia: bbyeeeeee...tk cr...gud nyt...hate u
Pia has logged out.
Mannu never knew that
just a thought of a strange girl would end up everything in minutes.
Life rolled on with the
pace of a turbine ignited with the power of several horses. Days passed with
the flick of an eye. The instant he comforted himself on the back of the chair
the Goliath within the book pulled him back. Combating with the books,
messaging and chatting with Pia about his present and the future, those days
especially about his birthday had brought him closer to the night before the
birthday.
The needles of the square shaped clock had not yet reached one top of another, but his cell phone had started beeping. Mannu had changed the monotonous ringtone to a more melodious one. At 11:59pm Pia’s message showed up.
The needles of the square shaped clock had not yet reached one top of another, but his cell phone had started beeping. Mannu had changed the monotonous ringtone to a more melodious one. At 11:59pm Pia’s message showed up.
‘As we grow older, we
often find that
it is better to LiGhT 1 small candle...
Happy Happy Birthday to my most special friend...
U mean a lot 2 me..Wsh u gud luck 4 ur future...tc..’
it is better to LiGhT 1 small candle...
Happy Happy Birthday to my most special friend...
U mean a lot 2 me..Wsh u gud luck 4 ur future...tc..’
It was a good emotion,
a feeling that depicted care and love. He read it again but an unread message
interrupted the view. It was Pia again.
‘I wl call u 2mrow.’
‘I wl call u 2mrow.’
Mannu had no time to re
read it, relax in its afterglow. Calls from Vivi and Zenin had made him 45
minutes older. He talked in whispers to avoid Mrs.K’s sleep. Zenin still
believed that Mannu would come to her one day with a love message on his lips.
Vivi and Mannu discussed more on equations and questions rather than gifts and
food. Dozens of messages had filled up the inbox. All this was over until late
1.
The morning had
arrived. Although wishes and blessings from the relatives, friends and
neighbours were pouring in, Mannu was awaiting the call from Pia. It would be
for the first time that he would hear her. Channu had given him a surprise
gift. As Mannu woke up and moved towards the study table he found a pen wrapped
in crepe paper. It was Channu’s favourite idea to gift a pen. It was also a
gesture to appreciate Mannu’s love for penning down poetry, which channu had
not shown directly. His face wanted to escape that appreciation, but the note
that lay besides the pen showed it clearly. Mrs. K was drowned in ambivalence.
She knew that this would be the last birthday with Mannu at home, although the
celebration included only two hours rest from study, but the day was not to
come back again. She was so confident of Mannu getting admitted to a premier
college. The only blessing that came from Mannu’s parents and home was to be
successful in his exams. Guddi was called in to assist Mrs. K for the evening
snack. Due to Mrs. K’s back pain the dinner was cancelled. Guddi had demanded
extra amount of money to assist her in dinner, but very soon the plan was
changed. Mannu didn’t want to celebrate things like this. He said he had grown
up.
“You’ll always be a kid for me...You were so small when you were born...”she said and made a cute gesture with her hands as if holding a basket with a child in it and continued ”I still remember that day at the hospital. I wanted to tell everybody but there were no phones like today. Your papa informed everybody from the PCO booth.” Listening to these words of hers, a bell rang in Mannu’s mind. The day was passing by, it was already ten and the expected call from Pia was to come anytime soon. He thanked Mrs. K to remind him of the phone. He touched her feet and she blessed him in a confused state of mind, unable to make out what the matter was. Why had Mannu come in a rush?
Never before did he frame out every word he had to use on the phone. This 18 year old life had never given him a lesson on patience. His heart and my mind had left the normal degree of operation. When the heart consented on the first sentence of the conversation, which he had started virtually, his mind was already over with the third. This was a unique strangeness which swallowed him like a fish in the ocean. He swam, swam for hours. He had become numb.
“You’ll always be a kid for me...You were so small when you were born...”she said and made a cute gesture with her hands as if holding a basket with a child in it and continued ”I still remember that day at the hospital. I wanted to tell everybody but there were no phones like today. Your papa informed everybody from the PCO booth.” Listening to these words of hers, a bell rang in Mannu’s mind. The day was passing by, it was already ten and the expected call from Pia was to come anytime soon. He thanked Mrs. K to remind him of the phone. He touched her feet and she blessed him in a confused state of mind, unable to make out what the matter was. Why had Mannu come in a rush?
Never before did he frame out every word he had to use on the phone. This 18 year old life had never given him a lesson on patience. His heart and my mind had left the normal degree of operation. When the heart consented on the first sentence of the conversation, which he had started virtually, his mind was already over with the third. This was a unique strangeness which swallowed him like a fish in the ocean. He swam, swam for hours. He had become numb.
“Hey Mannu...haven’t
you talked to a girl before?”
“Talk to her like she is any ordinary girl...Why you’re thinking and rethinking so much?”
“Talk to her like she is any ordinary girl...Why you’re thinking and rethinking so much?”
He was in a conversation with his own reflection. He didn’t know why was
he so troubled, but he could conclude that she was no ordinary girl.
Mannu’s heart beat reached two or three above 72 with
the thought of that message of Pia. ‘I wl call u 2mrow.’Since a long time he
was praying for this day to come soon. And today it was truly unnatural to know
that sometimes truth is really unbelievable. After a long wait he kept the
phone aside and opened the notebooks. Messages still interfered. Talks of Mrs.
K and Guddi were being heard faintly in the study room. He kept a constant eye
on the phone until it rang.
+9122 were the digits which Mannu had seen on his phone for the first time. He ran in search of a discreet corner to receive the call. His conscious and the sub conscious had lost their consciousness. His prepared speech lay behind at some corner of the study table.
He knew it was Pia. He fancied the jolly little smile on her face as she wished him a happy birthday just after a tender,delicate hello which echoed in his head minutes after the start of their conversation. She came near him through a payphone. He became a victim of the droplets of simplicity and innocence that poured from every word she spoke melodiously. Call ended. 03:04.
What followed next were dreams. He learnt dreaming bigger with Pia in his arms. Dreaming was becoming more beautiful. On that desert mountain his point of view about life changed completely as he googled north, east, west and south in search of a road that would take him home. His parents always gave lessons on how to lead a purposeful life. They had always taught that every situation is an opportunity to earn wisdom. For that instant he heard their words from one ear and they came out from the other, but till today they echoed in the cavity between them. His young mind, filled with innocence, had compelled him to take this unlikely move. He wasn’t aware of what was to happen at last. Not even aware where he had to keep his second foot. There was no calendar and no watch just night and day. Winds played him hide and seek. At a golden morning there was a garland of Mud Mountains behind his back and in the night he had to climb over it. He could percept the day when I’ll be drowned underneath them. He stood there, parted his lips for breath and moved on. Sometimes you have to make new definitions, set new destinations in order to sustain life. Water was a bigger necessity than an escape. The cold winds of the dark nights and the golden sunshine of the bright mornings had sucked every drop of blood that flowed within him. He wandered in search of a place where flowed, water. He saw it and knew he hadn’t, still he kept walking. His steps didn’t stop as hours evolved to be days. He reached there where nothing ever existed except an optical illusion. The fire filled rays of the sun had melted the 602 bones that let him stand. Sweat balls had replaced any other form of liquid. His pulse reading on a cardiogram was a straight line as if it was a manufacturer’s defect in that device. Only the last breath waited to escape his lips when Mrs. K woke him up to get ready for the IIT JEE exam.
While crossing a jungle, surely one has to meet lions. Isn’t it? Life also ages us under similar conditions. The exam came and went. As the society and his parents told his that if he had performed average, he had lost the biggest honour, and he imagined his life beyond the mountain crowned with the three letter title. There was nothing else he could do now. But the chakra, wheel of this ephemeral life would keep moving. There was no one who had won everything in the seventy or even one hundred and twenty years of his existence. He had now got a faint idea of what he had lost, but he could clearly perceive what was coming.
+9122 were the digits which Mannu had seen on his phone for the first time. He ran in search of a discreet corner to receive the call. His conscious and the sub conscious had lost their consciousness. His prepared speech lay behind at some corner of the study table.
He knew it was Pia. He fancied the jolly little smile on her face as she wished him a happy birthday just after a tender,delicate hello which echoed in his head minutes after the start of their conversation. She came near him through a payphone. He became a victim of the droplets of simplicity and innocence that poured from every word she spoke melodiously. Call ended. 03:04.
What followed next were dreams. He learnt dreaming bigger with Pia in his arms. Dreaming was becoming more beautiful. On that desert mountain his point of view about life changed completely as he googled north, east, west and south in search of a road that would take him home. His parents always gave lessons on how to lead a purposeful life. They had always taught that every situation is an opportunity to earn wisdom. For that instant he heard their words from one ear and they came out from the other, but till today they echoed in the cavity between them. His young mind, filled with innocence, had compelled him to take this unlikely move. He wasn’t aware of what was to happen at last. Not even aware where he had to keep his second foot. There was no calendar and no watch just night and day. Winds played him hide and seek. At a golden morning there was a garland of Mud Mountains behind his back and in the night he had to climb over it. He could percept the day when I’ll be drowned underneath them. He stood there, parted his lips for breath and moved on. Sometimes you have to make new definitions, set new destinations in order to sustain life. Water was a bigger necessity than an escape. The cold winds of the dark nights and the golden sunshine of the bright mornings had sucked every drop of blood that flowed within him. He wandered in search of a place where flowed, water. He saw it and knew he hadn’t, still he kept walking. His steps didn’t stop as hours evolved to be days. He reached there where nothing ever existed except an optical illusion. The fire filled rays of the sun had melted the 602 bones that let him stand. Sweat balls had replaced any other form of liquid. His pulse reading on a cardiogram was a straight line as if it was a manufacturer’s defect in that device. Only the last breath waited to escape his lips when Mrs. K woke him up to get ready for the IIT JEE exam.
While crossing a jungle, surely one has to meet lions. Isn’t it? Life also ages us under similar conditions. The exam came and went. As the society and his parents told his that if he had performed average, he had lost the biggest honour, and he imagined his life beyond the mountain crowned with the three letter title. There was nothing else he could do now. But the chakra, wheel of this ephemeral life would keep moving. There was no one who had won everything in the seventy or even one hundred and twenty years of his existence. He had now got a faint idea of what he had lost, but he could clearly perceive what was coming.
“She should have
reached by now.” Mannu said to himself gazing at the needles of that square
shaped clock. It was the 21st day of the month and Pia had to call him today.
The long wait was over. He reached the zenith of his restlessness and picked up
the phone. The tower of connections was completely uprooted. No Network.
Disdain escaped his lips. It was already noon and she would have reached Mumbai
lately by 10am. He ran in and out till after a 3 minute game of hide and seek
the network signal started climbing up. 1 New Message. “You have missed calls!”
A sign of good service in bad moments. Yes, she had called twice around ten
minutes ago. Mannu dialled her number, but cut the phone before it could ring.
She had requested him only to wait for her call.
A better speech was
ready. He had memorized it a number of times.
“Be brave. Just say...I love you Pia...Don’t worry...What if she says a no? A NO sometimes means much more than a YES.” Soliloquies. The moment which was going to change his life was on its way. To tell the truth, it had come. He realised that he had started loving Pia, a lot, and this streak of patience could not be lengthened any further. Distances and separation had echoed their plan in Mannu’s head. All he needed was courage to speak his heart out. Now, it didn’t matter that they hadn’t seen each other. It seemed insignificant that they were just virtual friends. He didn’t perceive the future. It didn’t matter. All that ran in him was to express his feelings. Say to her that he loved her.
“Be brave. Just say...I love you Pia...Don’t worry...What if she says a no? A NO sometimes means much more than a YES.” Soliloquies. The moment which was going to change his life was on its way. To tell the truth, it had come. He realised that he had started loving Pia, a lot, and this streak of patience could not be lengthened any further. Distances and separation had echoed their plan in Mannu’s head. All he needed was courage to speak his heart out. Now, it didn’t matter that they hadn’t seen each other. It seemed insignificant that they were just virtual friends. He didn’t perceive the future. It didn’t matter. All that ran in him was to express his feelings. Say to her that he loved her.
The cell phone in his
hand was beeping again. She spoke and he listened.
“The sangeet was gracious. We danced with all our relatives. I hadn’t
prepared the steps, but they just came out with the flow. Yaaaar...I’m missing
those days.” And with a very brief pause she would continue, “they even played
garba songs and I was like awestruck on what was going on? But no one stopped
dancing. And in breaks we were having snacks yaar. Have you ever seen such
things in a family function?“ and she would laugh to herself and Mannu tried
hard to accompany her. This conversation was blurring his memory, draining the
courage he had gathered. “And please Mannu close your eyes once. Let’s pray for
the bride and groom. They were complementing each other so perfectly. And if
you could see the bride, she just mesmerized me. Such a clear skin she had and
her arms...Ssss...as if wrapped with mehndi. Well that’s all for the lucky
people.” Mannu didn’t dare to interrupt. He was listening to her with closed
eyes as if still praying for the bride-groom. He decided not to change the
subject and keep his plans for some other day. Sometimes, she would even talk
to herself for seconds say him a ‘sorry sorry sorry’ and come back again in a
two sided talk. The call duration was raising, but Mannu was unable say those
mugged words.
“Come on say it...Come on you fool...”The overflow of some male hormones urged him to bull up, but at last he ended up as a taciturn.
“You are good for nothing Mannu...Good for nothing.”A replica with his persona stood ahead laughing at his individuality. It was much easier to love than to express. The Bollywood movies had inspired him with one thought on love. They show that one should never let his love go. Just say you love her, until it’s too late. Oh! With every word of Pia it seemed it was getting too late. It was not a good sign. Was he loosing her? Her laughter was again heard on the phone which brought him back to consciousness.
“And what to tell you about the wedding. It was grand, grand, grandest yaar. We stayed in a resort for two days and...oops bye bye bye. Mummy has come. I will call you again as I get time. Don’t call back ok. Bye Bye Bye.” She cut the phone after saying these words in one breath.
“Come on say it...Come on you fool...”The overflow of some male hormones urged him to bull up, but at last he ended up as a taciturn.
“You are good for nothing Mannu...Good for nothing.”A replica with his persona stood ahead laughing at his individuality. It was much easier to love than to express. The Bollywood movies had inspired him with one thought on love. They show that one should never let his love go. Just say you love her, until it’s too late. Oh! With every word of Pia it seemed it was getting too late. It was not a good sign. Was he loosing her? Her laughter was again heard on the phone which brought him back to consciousness.
“And what to tell you about the wedding. It was grand, grand, grandest yaar. We stayed in a resort for two days and...oops bye bye bye. Mummy has come. I will call you again as I get time. Don’t call back ok. Bye Bye Bye.” She cut the phone after saying these words in one breath.
‘Pia...I don’t know
what love is, but I know how true it is...If I see you someday...I’ll open my
arms just to hide you...Just to say...I love you.”Message saved to DRAFTS.
The marriage season was
on the go. It was the best time for students as they were free from
examinations and all the pressure that the exams accompany. The call with Pia
had ended abruptly and Mannu was trying hard to convince himself that it was
not as bad an omen as his mind was trying to make him believe. Again he was
wrangling, soothing in his soliloquies.
“I’m not willing to go
Mummy. I’m not feeling well.” said Mannu lying on his bed while Mrs. K was
ironing the saree she was to wear for the event. She had applied a face mask
and Channu had obeyed her for the same without any word. All his friends were
coming, new and old. With minimum strength Mrs. K spoke in a flat voice ”I will
not tell you what to do...You’ve really grown up. After your exams you have
changed a lot...I can see. Good...accha hai now you need to take your own
decisions...” She was willing to speak more but Mannu interrupted”It’s not that
way Mummy. Why have you started saying that? You have also changed a lot.
Anything that I do, you just blame me about taking independent decisions...Kya
Mummy.” In disgust he stood upright and dashed to the bathroom. She knocked the
door. “Now what? I’m acting on your decision na.” came Mannu’s echo. “Still I
am saying you can do what you feel good. Don’t blame me afterwards that I made
you waste your fun time.” Mannu became submissive now. Speaking his pain was
not going to help. Things were in fact being spoiled. Mrs. K was on the phone
and she gave a thwarted look at Mannu as he came out of the bathroom. He left
to dress, dripping water from his head and face.
“Haan I was asking how much should we keep in the envelope?” She had called Mr. K.
“Hmmm...and did you have dinner?” came her voice in the next room. Channu was completely ready and he was playing guitar in the drawing. His phone kept ringing time and again and his chuckles were heard while he assured his friends of his presence.
“Haan I was asking how much should we keep in the envelope?” She had called Mr. K.
“Hmmm...and did you have dinner?” came her voice in the next room. Channu was completely ready and he was playing guitar in the drawing. His phone kept ringing time and again and his chuckles were heard while he assured his friends of his presence.
Meanwhile Mannu dressed
himself devoid of any confusion on what to wear which was usually the case. The
only thought of marriage was pulling him down. It had brought bitter memories.
It took Pia away from him for ten long days and their last talk, totally
dedicated to the details of marriage, was the reason of all his disquiet. But
here was his mother’s heart showing all the signs of fear. He couldn’t break
that too. “Now see how good you both are looking. Mannu...beta learn to be
social now. Meet new people you’ll feel better. Accha I permit you fully to
have as much of ice cream and soft drinks as you like. Now smile...my good
sons.” Spoke Mrs. K while circling a Rs. 10 note above Mannu and Channu. It was
kept in one corner of the kitchen to be given to Guddi.
Sitting in the last row
of the marriage hall eating pakora’s every eye was simply waiting to see the
garland show. Food also caught eyeballs more frequently than any other thing or
face. Invitees who proffered on dieting had started with soups and salads. They
were mainly ladies. Mannu kept sitting and watching others with the cell phone
in his left hand and his right hand to hide it. He didn’t want Mrs. K to see
him messaging, not being social the way she wanted. Children in yellow and red
kurta were running all over the multi coloured curtains of the Shyam tent
house. Ladies were busy setting their ornaments and sarees with an epiphany on
their red and brown painted lips. Girls were laughing, eating snacks; most of
them centred on the pani batasha and aloo tikki stalls. Boys stood behind them
in a hope to seek the pleasure to talk, touch and have one of their favourites
with them till they were forced by their parents to leave for home. Waiter’s
behaved like ATM machines which had no money, but a transaction limit. As they
saw a crowd of young guys approaching the stall, they stood silent, their hands
back folded and a notion on their faces which conveyed that they were over with
the stock. You always remember the face you feed. The waiter’s already knew, in
particular, that the guys were over with a dozen of Chocó chips, sprite and
pepsi. The bride’s father had appreciated their conduct which made them more
adamant. Every land has its own blends, own taste, own spirit and own culture.
‘Nawabo ki baat hi kuch aur hai, Nawabs are uniquely different.’ The dinner
tables were hoofed with mouth sweltering kebab’s and finger licking varieties
of chicken. And the uniqueness of the black, golden and white sherwani’s
lighted the night scene more beautifully the moon and stars ever could.
The notes from the shehnai were like sa, re, ga, ma..., the riffs and
picks besmeared with nostalgia. It was a strange day. Still Mannu was busy
messaging Vivi, that was all he had been doing, but he managed to relish all
the snacks. In his head was going on the counting of questions he marked
correct in the engineering entrance paper. In the morning he was sitting in the
examination hall with even no time to see the girl on the other bench and now
in the evening when there were girls around him, whom he could have talked to
spend a youthful evening, he wanted to see none. Pia was walking to take the
space.
She walked a tender walk on the red carpet with a blissful smile on her lips. Oh! But a nervous brow! Who was not watching her mesmeric beauty? The kids were held by their mother’s. Boys and girls went closer to their parents before they were scolded for their absence. The air changed, filled with the fragrance of flowers. The start of the married life on an Indian bride is coloured with red and golden. Her eyes were fixed on her nails. She liked red. They lift him up. They pull her down. They pull him down. They lift her up. Getting married seemed tough. Finally, came the moment when the garlands were exchanged and the sound of claps and whistles just drove everybody back to their plates, back to the real world. The beauty of the moment aroused Mannu. He selected Pia’s name from the phonebook and shifted the message in DRAFTS to the SENT ITEMS folder.
‘Just stay away...let me live my own life...’ Came a prompt message. It shook Mannu. He kept the glass
of soft drink on the chair beside him. It spilled, but he paid no effort to
clean the mess, just moved the chair sideways. He was taken aback. It seemed as
if the virtual intoxication had subsided and he was welcomed by the reality of
real world. Moving abruptly he went on to fetch a glass of water, but the
message made a conscious rigging in his mind. He checked the contact list, re
saved Pia’s name in the list to confirm
whether he had sent the message to the right girl. Everything was fine, except
the swift reply. He tried hard to accept that the message was from Pia. For the
present moment it was the reality. He went to a corner, splashed his face, and
cried silently. Oh the merry world and Mannu! The answer to the message was
still unfound. It was Pia’s number. But was she the sender? Night followed and darkness perpetrated the
fact that Mannu was wrong in his belief that love could find a place on ORKUT.
No sleep entered his swollen eyes which shed tears up to the point they were
dry and moments later they were wet again. He woke up. The clock showed fifteen
minutes past three. Channu was fast asleep. He checked for water, but the
bottle was absent tonight. It was his turn to keep a bottle next to the bed as
Channu had been doing it for a couple of days. Mannu didn’t care to move out.
He lay back again wondering what had been going on during these days. Was
everything just a figment of imagination and what about the world he had built
upon it? How foolish he was. He cursed himself and the flow of tears thickened.
“How could Pia do this to me? Doesn’t she have a heart? She looks so pretty, so
innocent but does she have such a black heart? Oh! I can’t believe it” and a
splash of cry came out. He buried himself under the pillow and sobbed. He could
have managed to hear a ‘no’, but...”I won’t forgive her ever if this be the
truth. I started loving you and now you say this to me.” Laying flat he talked
to himself. No answer came by. And he decided not to ask her about the message
again.
Things were the same next morning,
the next and the next; her wake up messages, her talks on love, kisses and she
herself. Still one or two messages a day were like rains in December. Mannu
just read and saved them. He wanted Pia to come up with the acceptance that she
was not the sender. He was curious to know if Pia was even aware of those
messages. They talked rarely. A void had been created and it was not easy for
Mannu to let go off things. Still he was quite sure that Pia was unaware of
those messages. 1 New Message.
‘Hieee
Mannu...pick up d phone...’
‘Why??? Does it matter to you???Mannu replied.
1 New Message.
‘It
matters a lot Mannu...it matters a lot...’
‘Why???’ .
1 New Message.
‘Coz...I love u...love u a lot.’
It was unbelievable to Mannu’s soul.
Again such a reverse in her talks. He became numb, laid back on his bed and
switched the phone off. The lunch was kept aside and it lay there until Mrs. K
forced him to eat atleast some of it. He managed to gulp a chapati. Mrs. K
chose to sit with him, but she never did nay talking.
“Take the studies easy. I think then
you can grasp more” she said at last and moved the utensils. Water was served
as a ritual, but he didn’t drink it either. Mannu couldn’t realise the state he
was in. The constant talking within him went louder and louder and finally he
chose to switch on the mobile. Still, after all this game of reversals and
heart breaking, he didn’t want Pia to troubled much. This break would have
served the purport of telecasting his anger to her. Instead the break had been
long. 10 missed calls and no message. It was clear to Mannu that things were
not so casual. Oh! Again he cursed himself for the delay in switching on the
phone. The whole blame seemed transposed upon him.
“What
did u mean by those messages? Stay away from me??? Why did u say so?Tell me
why? Didn’t u think once how wud I feel?Where is all d care now...”As he
was typing the message, his phone rang. It was a miss call from Pia.”Now what does this miss call mean? ” He
sent the message not hopeful of a reply. But the day was giving him surprises.
Short and Sweet, Long and bitter.
“Wow
Mannu...U believe that I could have done so. So much of our talks, those
sleepless talky nights have build this image of mine...What shall I say?”
“Say nothing...jst tell me what were those messages. Who
did it?”
“Which messages r u talking about. How much do u want me
to cry? I know nothing of them. Check the number again. I never messaged u
anything lyk dat...How r u treating me? I just said to u my feelings and this
is wat I get in return...U hurt me Mannu”
There was truth in her words. Mannu
couldn’t deny it.
From where did the confusion creep
in? And the bigger question confronting Mannu was when did it creep in? The
fragility of the virtual relation showed its face, as if there was nothing
between them in real. Days went by again with the same pace. They didn’t talk.
Only miss calls were exchanged. No one could gather enough courage to speak
out. The decisions, non decisions taken in a fancy had faulted giving nothing
but blankness.
‘Mannu...don’t
u love me???’ This was the last message in Mannu’s inbox. He said a yes in uncountable notions, but to
himself.
‘Pia...I
don’t know...’He sent this message with a hope that Pia would read and
listen to what his heart wanted to say.
‘Can
u cl me at night???’A message from Pia read. Typing *12...# he waited for
the operator service to process the balance request. Rs.3.05.
‘Ya...y
not???I’ll call u @ 11:30’ replied Mannu. Silence had made things
softer.
The day was still to live its life.
Channu had scored well in a national Olympiad, the results of which were
announced a couple of days before. The verbal beatings by Mrs. K had added to
Mannu’s bluesy state of mind. His performance had been poor in the IIT JEE exam
and Channu was showing signs completely in contrast to Mannu’s academic
achievements. But he did not retaliate, made no excuse, but immersed himself
more into the world of poetry. Mrs. K had invited several ladies of the colony,
who themselves had made the invitation. From the past two days many had come to
congratulate Mrs. K and in the light gossip that spread throughout the evening
they slipped in the request of a party, sipping the evening tea and relishing
the homemade snacks after a queue of “no no...please please”. “Badi baat
hai...Let’s have a get together” was generally heard and Mrs. K, busy in
offering snacks and tea, also overwhelmed with joy could not refuse or delay
the prospect. She wanted Mr. K to be present but the weekend was days away and
waiting for so long would send a wrong message that she wasn’t ready to
celebrate the moment, that the get together was a forced event arranged only in
pressure but not by will. It was sure to show her in a dull light and Mrs. K
could not bear that. The following day was decided for the event. Mannu and
Channu were immediately set to work.
Mrs. K started the dusting and
cleaning the cutlery. Mannu, being taller than Channu, was given the task to
place down the bowl set, glass set from the store room to the kitchen.
“”Aaraam se...Don’t let it fall.”Mrs.
K’s voice was heard in the store.
“I know...I’m not a kid
now...”replied Mannu.
“Haan Haan I know you...you have a
habit since childhood of breaking things.” And a thud was heard. Mrs. K rushed
to the store room immediately.
“Dekho..Dekho...I told you to be
careful na...Kya giraya?”Mrs. K exclaimed.
“Nothing I just slipped.It’s ok. But
you care more for the crockery na Mummy. Anyways who cares about me?”Mannu replied
in a tone loud in the context of the distance his voice had to travel.
“Ok Ok...finish this work carefully
and then make a list of the eatables.”
“I have to study. Please make it on your own
na Mummy. I’ll go to bring it...promise.”Mannu replied, as if very tired after
the lifting and placing of the boxes.
“Please stop this rubbish. If you had
really been busy we would have had a celebration for you...But we are doing it
for your younger brother.” Devoid of any emotion he left the room and made the
list. It was agreed that all the purchasing would be done by Channu as the work
had to be divided, surely.
With earphones plugged in his ears,
Mannu started moving just to move. Accelerating the bike he looked left, looked
right, but his mind was centred with one thought; Thought of the night and the
emotional exchange that was to take place. Never had he got a proposal to talk
to a girl at night. Many thoughts ran in his mind of which he himself wasn’t
aware. 11 kilometres away from the home,
they reached Hazratganj, waiting for
the red light to turn green. Mannu blinked, shook his head, positioned his
eyeglasses and moved on. There was no talking from Channu. The empty right seat
in one corner of Cafe Coffee Day caught up his eye. The same goggle seller was struggling to make
a sale outside the front window.
“Maybe I see you soon Mr.CCD.”
The road side book stores, which Mannu longed
to visit, were at a moment’s distance from him, but he sat silent, tasteless of the beauty of
those books. His gaze was more towards the yellow, pink and red teddies that
waved a hello from the gift store. They reminded him of the smileys that
completed Pia’s words, whether it was a message chat or an online chat. From
the outside he examined the shelves that displayed gifts and greetings for
lovers. They sold stills, crowns, bracelets, rings and heart shaped chocolates
and toys. Meanwhile Channu was did the shopping.
When and how will I see Pia?
The whole world came to a stop. He scratched my chin, pinched his brows with
closed eyes and when he was out with no answer he sat on the stairs outside a
ATM machine. Silence and emptiness surrounded him. The road to see Pia was
still filled with fog and darkness.
The new message on the phone ended up
the transient sadness. It showed I had Rs. 250 in my phone account. All his
savings were over and Mannu had nothing to clear Vivi’s debt. Lost in a deep emotion he wrote to himself.
Life blows like a breeze,
fading the past.
Is tomorrow something better?
My today’s asked.
Message saved to Drafts.
“3rd May 2008... A strange
beautiful day...” Mannu thought, giving way to all who enter and exit the ATM.
Some even made faces but he chose to sit there unmindful of them. The turmoil
within was greater to give way to any other thought. The wind had become
thicker. A leaf came flying and stuck Mannu’s hair. Time had turned it yellow.
He smiled.
Life is all about living in the present. Mannu recalled Mr. K’s words and moved towards the
bike.
“Sab le liya na?”Questioned Mannu.
“Hmmm...Hmmm...Bada ho raha hu...I
will manage after you go to college bhaiya.”
Back home the seating arrangements
had been done. Sofas were decorated with new covers, creamy in texture and the
lamps had been switched on to create a late evening ambience. The artificial
flowers were mopped thoroughly and their location was changed. It was Channu’s
idea to keep the flowers facing the door so that the first sight of the visitor
should be on the flowers. Mrs. K agreed to it. After all it was because of Channu
that the home had a reason to celebrate. Channu also helped Mrs. K in arranging
the crockery which was which was well placed to avoid rounds of kitchen. The
smell of the pakoras, just to taste
the salt and spice, overpowered the freshener’s fragrance. The churning from
the mixer grinder made it clear that all the arrangements were done. Mrs. K
prepared the coriander-lemon-mint-masala chutney at last as the grinder was way
out of its life. It was gifted by Mrs.K’s younger sister on the first marriage
anniversary. Almost 19 years in age the grinder spilled the raw inputs in
different directions. The lid of the mixer had to be held tight, still the
grinder half did its right job. Guddi, in her loud tone, usual although, was
laughing, trying to invite praises from Mrs. K as she had arranged for the
quick repairs that were needed in Mrs. K’s saree.
“Maalkin..thik hai na?”Enquired
Guddi, her hands half dipped in the wash sink and her head turned towards Mrs.
K.
“Let me wear it...How can I tell you
now?Accha wash the glass bowls
also...They have been lying unused for a long time, just rinse them carefully.
I’ll serve pakora’s in them.” Spoke
Mrs. K, pouring the semi solid chutney in a serving bowl. It was kept in a tray
and encircled by little cup size bowls for individual serving.
“Channuuu...Mannuuu...”She called
them at the top of her voice.
“Turant phone kar ke bulaya
Maalkin...I saved you 50 rupees...Thik kia na maalkin”Spoke Guddi completing
her chores. Mrs. K was unable to attend to her words.
“Channu...beta keep the tray on the
stool beside the centre table.”
“Haan Guddi...It would have easily
cost 30 40 rupees”
“Maalkin no one does it in 30 40
rupees these days...Wo zamaane gaye. Instant
service is costly Maalkin. 50 to 60 rupees minimum...Bacha diye maine aapke paise...”
“Hmmm...Hmmm inform your husband that
you will be late...else he will come searching for you.” Mrs. K told Guddi and
made her way to iron the saree.
Meanwhile Mannu had found a silent
corner. He was preparing himself for the conversation that was to follow.
Channu was sitting with the aunties, taking the praises and blessings. He was
even given an envelope by Dr. Varshneya, the eldest among the attendees. He
buried it in a book and went back to the drawing room. This behaviour was unusual
on his part, but it showed how happy he was with his first academic achievement
at a national level. Mannu opened up a poetry compilation of Khayyam, Ghalib
and others. The thoughts on love were bitter, soft at times too, stark and
sharp in tone and Mannu was still unable to make out what was to follow. Why
had Pia made such a request even after the misunderstanding? If she wanted to
reconcile things why did she choose the end of the day? Was she so busy
throughout the day to resolve the budding affair? Mannu felt that she had been
careless on her part, but a part of him asked him not to fill his mind with any
preconceived notion.
Pakora’s were served for dinner
accompanied by a milk shake. Mrs. K had already gone to the bedroom and Mannu
was alone at the dinner table.
“You won’t be able to sleep in a lighted room.
It would pinch your eyes... believe me.” Mannu spoke to Channu. The time was 11
pm.
“I’m not sleeping yet.”
“But why? You see it’s already 11 pm.
You’ve to get up early for your school... right? Tomorrow you’ve to perform, so
have a good sleep.” Mannu said again.
“Yaa... but...”
“No ifs and buts... come on go to
sleep.” Mannu interfered and started forcing him towards the door. It was 11:20
pm already.
“Will you study, Bhaiya, brother?” Channu enquired.
“Yaa...”
“Then I’ll practice the guitar
piece... it won’t harm your ears. And... And why be so fussy?” Channu spoke
irritated, but fresh.
“I can’t study with your head in front of
me... I need some space tonight. Chemistry isn’t as easy as it seems to you.
Why don’t you understand Channu? I have many exams going on.” Mannu retaliated.
There was silence around. Channu inhaled deeply, kept his books on the table
and left without even saying a word. Mannu was ashamed of himself and his
uncanny behaviour. The clock showed 11:30 pm. But Iit was sure that both would
make up with each other the next morning.
“Good night, Mummy.”
“Good night beta.”
“Good night Channu.”
“Hmmmm... Good night.” Channu replied
and asked Mannu to close the door that led to Mrs.K’s room.
In a hurry he went to the other room,
set the pillow, turned off the lights and hid himself in a bed sheet. Oh! He woke
up again and brought the water bottle. Walking on the tip of his toes he
brought one from the refrigerator. The grinning of the stabiliser made him
comfortable, confident that they would suppress his voice. A new excitement was building up. After dormancy
that lasted for the whole day Mannu felt something good was going to happen.
Strange, but beautiful! His young conscience ordered him to hurry. The dim
light of the mobile phone pinched his eyes. He processed the phone with his
left eye closed, until he pressed the dial button after half emptying the 500ml
bottle.
A ‘hello’ couldn’t have been more
exotic. Something like a rattle crept up his whole body. She talked in whispers
and so did he. They both had that feeling of shyness till the end of the first
minute. Silence and deep breaths had followed the everlasting ‘hello’. The darkness and stillness of the
night had blindfolded Mannu and seized his lips.
“Pia...” He breathed on her through
my phone.
“Yaaa... I’m on the line...” said Pia
in a low and dusky voice.
Something
happened inside his body, again.
“Have you turned off the lights,
Pia?” Mannu asked her, checking the door..
“No... Shall I?”
“Yes... why not?”
“Wait a second...”
“Okay....”
Even after hiding himself under a
sheet and that too in the month of May, he was shivering.
Oh God... help me. Mannu
prayed and checked the door again to ensure safety.
“Mannu...” She spoke. Her words were
accompanied with a tail of some deep, warm breaths. They had the warmth just
like the first fire of a dark winter night which heals the soul and the body.
She was nervous.
“Congratulations....We are...” She
choked.
“Hmmmm...Speak up...” Mannu
whispered, peeping out of the sheet to get a glimpse of the door. Everything
was fine. Mrs. K and Channu were asleep.
“I am sorry. I don’t know what
happened. But I guess it was Anuskha who did it. She came to my room. We sat
for a very long time and she would have sent you those messages.Now i feel how
foolish I was to tell her everything. She was jealous, I knew, but how could
she do it. I am sorry. Please forgive me.” She spoke altogether breaking the
long silence.
“ I... I love you.” She continued.
Mannu was speechless. Such was the
magic in her voice. A tear drop rolled
out Mannu’s eyes.
“Even if you don’t say... I know you
love me.” She broke the silence, again.
A smile parted Mannu’s dried lips. He
didn’t want to disturb the thought by drinking water.
“I love you too.”
“I knew in my heart that you couldn’t
message me those words...But..I’m sorry too. I doubted on you. I shouldn’t have
done that. I was wrong Pia...I am sorry.”
She was shy and Mannu was glad as she
praised him for his courage to speak up that he loved her. Still Mannu’s heart
was pounding up and down. He woke up again and again and again to check if he
had become a victim of Mrs.K’s eyes. But till now he was safe.
In few minutes their talks had
evolved. Subjects had changed. They talked about the future, the turns their
love would take and the gifts that it will bring along. All seemed a distant
dream for a moment and then it seemed as if all was going to happen bit by bit,
step by step, kiss by kiss.. She giggled, felt silent for a while until she
came out with some words.
“Chup
raho na, just keep quiet.” Mannu knew they were spoken in an ostentatious
state.
“Can I ask you something, Pia?”
“I know what you’ll...” She
whispered.
“What? Hello... hello...” Mannu spoke
up, puffing his lungs with more air.
“I know what you’ll ask.” She said
again.
“Really! I don’t believe this...”
Mannu said, passing his first kiss.
Silence.
“Speak up Pia... I can kiss you...
now you’re all mine.”
“Anushka deleted that message and all
those messages were from her side. Believe me...” Pia came out with the right
words. It was the pressing question that Mannu had kept subsided within him up
to now.
Mannu passed a kiss again. He didn’t
ask her how she knew it. The moment itself was the answer. She kissed back and it continued for a long
while. Oh... they never wanted to see the sun again. She took his name in longing,
he took hers. She needed his touch, she needed closeness. But what could be done virtually? Nothing! And she started
sobbing.
“Don’t cry. We’ll be near darling...
Hmmm.”
“Are we doing it right? Can we call
it love?” She questioned amidst her sobbing, which had now became much more
audible.
“Pia... Pia... Pia... calm down...
listen to me...” Mannu paused deliberately to think of the right words to keep
her calm. “Listen to me...” He continued.
“Hmmm...” Somehow, she managed to
speak.
“You know what...”
“Hmmm...” She spoke.
“I’ve heard in songs... blind love is
true.” He said to reconcile her, rubbing the palm over his stomach in
perplexity.
“Come on wipe your tears. Tell me one
thing. Since when do you love me?”asked Mannu, in a tone loud enough to keep things
safe.
“Tumko
nahi pata kya, don’t you know that?” She spoke delicately.
The night had grown old and the moon
made a faded appearance outside the window. They both were in love with that
night. They prayed together, thanked God for the 9 pm of everyday, talked, sang
songs, laughed and kissed. Yes! The love
grew deeper, minute by minute, kiss by kiss. The confusion gave way to oneness
and Mannu was in love with her from head to foot, her eyes, her ears, her
nails, her voice, her skin, her fingers, her fragrance so imagined and even the
colour of her iris. They were to celebrate the 3rd of every month as
the day of love, the day of Mannu and Pia. The first thing to be updated the
next morning was the relationship status on ORKUT. Backspace ‘Single’ and ink
space ‘Committed’! The ORKUT account had sparked their lives. No one dare to
reach the end of the night, but time had its flow.
Mannu opened his eyes abruptly. The
call had ended. Yes it had as Mannu’s cell account balance halted at zero after
a beep, heard several times before. She called from her mother’s phone just to
end the call softly. Her phone account too ran out of balance. The clock showed
5 am and the dim morning light entered Mannu’s bedroom. Meanwhile, it was the
time for Pia’s grandmother to wake up and Pia had to consent on her words that
she had had a very pleasant sleep. Their talks started and Pia was bereft of
any sleep that night. A message from Pia popped up and it became the day starte
for Mannu. There was something else that
rather surprised him. In all the hustle of the day he forgot about the dark
change that unfolded around. The PC stood still. The study table as usual was
messed up. Between the sounds of the tick of the clock, the fluttering of the
calendar proved that it existed. It stole the look of Mannu’s eyes as if
something new happened. Every rotation of the fan took a part of him away to a
place where he was all alone. Drowned in
the depth of the ocean of his thoughts, he realised it was the time to leave
home. Wiping the nostalgic commodity off his eyes he saw everything for one
last time. A smile popped up as the last words escaped his lips. Alvida Avadh, goodbye Avadh.
Two warm months had passed. The
results of the engineering exams had been out and Mannu was to leave for his
graduation studies very soon. In talks with Mrs. K he sounded unsure whether he
would be able to carry himself or not.
Would the new real world give me some good buddies like
the old ones? He kept on asking
God in his prayers.
Sitting calmly near the window of his room, he
pitied the empty playground. All the kids had almost grown up, suddenly got
busy with books. The open field too, silently watched the opera of Mannu’s
life. The non playful days, only one or two in a month were going to be
replaced by the playful ones. This was the first change evident and visible,
even to his myopic eyes.
‘Oooh...Oooh...Sweet Child O’
Mine...’ For the past hour this song
had hammered Mannu’s head. The confusion was giving birth to a pile of tension
and he needed to talk to Pia, but ‘insufficient balance’ mostly acted as a
vaccine against his happiness and calmness.
“Mannu...Come down beta. Have
something to eat.”Mrs. K’s voice, dull by the upcoming events, called
Mannu. With a heavy heart and an empty
mind he reached the dining and fresh aroma of delicacies entered his nostrils.
Ultimately, a smile rested on his frowned face.
“Where were you?” She questioned,
with her hands busy in serving the pakora’s
and chutney.
“Uh, I was... uh, not far.” Replied Mannu,
scratching his forehead.
“Don’t you know?” She spoke, looking
at the calendar.
“What?”
“That you’ll be leaving for your
college in a week?” She continued.
“I know, Mum.” replied Mannu with a
deep sigh.
“Then please stay with us for longer.
Stop wandering about just for a week. After that I won’t be there to stop you.”
She said, looking straight into Mannu’s eyes.
She had a pain in her heart, more
intense than Mannu could perceive. She shared it with him, partly, , cried too,
but he kept silent. Speaking about his fears, anxieties would weaken them more.
Silence was the best form of aspirin, but all bonds of courage and silence
broke before Pia. He shared everything to her. The two month old love had given
him new strength, enough to accept and face the inexorable realities of the
real world.
“I
love you Pia... I love you Pia.” He said to her, probably to himself.
After the snack retreat Mannu sat in
his room, holding the guitar. ‘Oooh...Oooh...Sweet Child O’ Mine...’ It still continued. The room was empty.
Channu was busy with the phone. It was the first time Mannu saw him doing so.
Mrs. K was busy cleaning the tables and Mannu was searching for something to
kill my emptiness. The room reminded him of childhood memories. He developed a
strange fascination for everything that lay. The unoccupied side of the double
bed whispered a truth in his ears. It was time to change the room partner! The
mischievous talks with Channu, quarrels, one on one fight, gun fights, pillow
fights, GI Joe fights were some reminiscences
that had their marks on these walls. Those old crazy days were gone, not be
found again in any corner. Mannu thanked Channu by kissing his portrait. Truly,
the world is so small and our lives so big.
The square shaped clock showed 10.30
pm. It was the new time to sleep. They three were to sleep in Mrs. K’s bedroom.
Mrs. K was unwilling to leave him alone for the whole night. Pia had sacrificed
her desire of talking to Mannu at nights. Thoughts were but passed through
messages. Channu had a question that could be seen in his eyes, but he never
asked, so Mannu never answered.
Channu had started showing love and
care. They shared the same pillow and the whole night Mannu used to tell him
Buddha stories and tales from Zen books, one he liked the most,
“The moon may be appearing half or full, yet it is a
complete moon. If it is not dark to begin with, why wait for it to brighten?”
He was badly annoyed by the phone light, which
glowed with every new message from Pia and forced him to close his eyes. So, Mannu
didn’t dare to tell him about Pia. They had conversations on the ways Channu
would support Mrs. K, take care of every homely matter, including his studies.
He pinched Mannu on the point he liked.
After the irresistible night beak,
the flow of love continued as Mannu opened his eyes. The end of the school had
made him lazy and the time to wake up had become much more flexible, usually
around 8 which was extended, snooze after snooze, till 8 30. Mrs. K did not
disturb Mannu’s sleep. The first thing that he watched now was the screen of
his phone. It had replaced Thank you prayer.
A short message to wake him up and a
second one, just with the words ‘I LOVE YOU’ gave Mannu a perfect adolescent
start for the day. He rolled on the bed, side to side, unwrapped himself from
the sheets for minutes in a joyful imagination of Pia’s bedroom, little and
pink; her loose off shoulder tee shirt from which shone her yellowy gleaming
skin and how graciously she’d be sipping coffee near the bedside window while
messaging him. I continued until Guddi came up and switched off the fan. The
titillation by the sweat beads on his forehead brought him out from the virtual
world, back to Lucknow. He had been
deficient with the grade of college he was allotted for graduation, but life
poured in a completely new wave of hope; everlasting, unbound. In a joyful
remembrance of the dreams Mannu woke up and went to the bathroom, hiding his
phone in the shorts. He had purchased one,
just for the sake of a pocket it had. It made his thighs sweat at night
and he had to roll out of the sheet at times, still Mannu preferred to put it
on. The pocket in it helped avoid Mrs. K’s eye on the whereabouts of the mobile
phone. Love was making him different.
He called Pia from the bathroom,
turning on the tap to avoid audibility of his talks. The conversation was in
whispers, hisses but Mannu wanted to take no chance. Getting heard by Mrs. K or
Guddi meant a complete end. He checked the lock on door twice and dialled her
number. Her faint, kiddish laughs were heard. Mannu was weak at expressing
himself and the condition for the first call was that ‘I LOVE YOU Pia’ had to
be the words, not a hello or hi. Her laughs made him sweat more. He breathed
deep. Sleep was all gone. She started laughing. The strong mobile network
quickly brought her kisses to him.
“My darling wants to say
something?”She spoke amid her giggles from the other side of the phone.
“Pia...”Mannu just came out with her
name.
“Ok...Say after me...I...”Pia spoke.
“I...”spoke Mannu.
“Love...”She continued.
“Love...”Mannu said, turning the knob
of the tap clockwise.
“You...”Pia completed.
“You...I love you Pia...”He spoke up
finally. It was a good feeling. It felt pearls had been exchanged and now the
day can go on. Pia had set this rule to bring Mannu completely out of sleep in
minutes. And it really worked.
As he came out of the bathroom,
unclean, untidy he did things which were strange for Mrs. K.
“You are taking fifteen minutes to
brush your teeth. God knows how you will attend the first lecture every
morning.”
“Arey...you
don’t worry mummy. This luxury is only till I am at home.”
Singing a love song in a high voice,
caressing his hairs, adoring himself in front of a mirror, he went on to the
balcony to fetch the towel. It was surprising for Mrs. K. She stared him with a
question, tension and confusion on her lips.
“Kiska
phone tha, Whose call was it?”
“Phone? What Phone? Oh...The one
yesterday night. It was from a friend I met in a poetry competition. He was
asking me for the book of Faiz. He lives in Alambagh near the pacific mall.
Hmmm...Uhhh...I said I can’t give you that and now when I am not coming to
school how you would return it...” and Mrs. K interrupted, fed up by his
defiant reply. Her eyes has caught the
thief in him.
“I got it. I got it. Now go and bath
soon. I have made utappam for
breakfast. Go and please clean your hairs. Wearing a cap to hide them is not a
good habit.”
“I don’t understand how you can be so
charming, happy...Guddi” Mrs. K spoke asking her to mop the space underneath
the study table and continued”even after this academic performance.”
The loud song on
Mannu’s lips dimmed her words and he walked to the bathroom, carefree. Utappam was cherished by one hand and one hand was occupied by the
mobile. The message read,
"Net pack expired.
Can't come online. Maybe for a few daz!!!Will keep touch thru phone whenever
Mum goes out. If u have some savings get my recharge done...msg card of 11
rupees.Tc.njoy utappam..waiting 2 C U @ 9 sooon."
The net package had already done more than
it’s worth. Walking with time they both had started doing things for each
other. Saving money for mobile top up was one big thing. Love had also taught
them sacrifice. Pia walked the distance to her college instead of hiring an auto
and saved twenty rupees in a to and fro journey. On the ‘how’ and ‘why’ that
her mother used to ask about her delay she used it discuss it with Mannu
beforehand and pass the scrutiny easily. Excuses were often repeated and their
life was very casual. They were kept as short and relevant as possible. Bac in
her room she used to curse herself for this new habit she had to inculcate
deliberately to nourish the new relation. “Relax dear...What else can we do?
Would mum accept the truth?” came Mannu’s generic reply and this was enough to
suffice her anxiety. In some hottest afternoons Mannu somehow escaped Mrs. K’s
eyes to walk to the recharge shop as getting the bike started was too noisy.
Dedication was quiet and it always overcame heat. For Aannu as school was over
so was his pocket money. The savings to clear the debt of Vivi had been spent
in recharges and apart from that Mannu used to collect coins that he found in
the side envelopes of the cover of the refrigerator or on the kitchen slab. The
coins there worked as a weight to the bill that left to be tallied by Mrs. K
and one rupee less didn’t bother his mother much. Mostly five rupee coins were
found from the box near the bedside. More than thrice a ten rupee note had been
taken secretly that too directly from Mrs.K’s purse. It went un noticed till
now. Pia gave away her outing with college mates for vada paav or pani batasha.
When Mannu assured her that he would get the recharge done and she should not
reduce the charm in her life just for him, she would succinctly say that she no
more relishes it. That the taste has become boring to her. It wasn’t the truth
and Mannu knew that, but he was also sure that she would never go back to that
expense again. She had him as the priority. Further the savings were broken
into parts and the other part was for the gift she would give him the first
they meet. A full talk time top up for
the third of every month took away a part of the savings too.
Till today, all they had seen of each
other was the 2cm display picture on the ORKUT profile. Talks were all that
kept themselves together.
“Hum
kab milenge, When we’ll meet?”
Pia’s innocent question left Mannu
speechless. When was this virtual relation going to find its real life was
known to none?
The time to leave for college had
made its advent. From the past one week mornings seemed to come very early.
After the daylong planning and listing of items to be purchased and packed
Mannu hadn’t even fallen asleep and the clock brought the sun back again. The
breakfast included entirely what Mannu demanded. Utappam, paneer pakoras, pasta
and what not. Earlier it was denied. Mrs. K insisted only fruits, boiled eggs
and corn flakes Now things were taking a
different turn. Mrs. K could not afford to keep Mannu’s any wish unfulfilled
till he was home. As a mother the idea sounded too unethical. He was more like
a guest now. The present commenced with
a thought of the future. Twice or even thrice a week, Mannu left out for a new
purchase. Pia gave a placid idea about the trends in fashion. She also
instructed him that purchase should be guided by the quality of clothing, not
the brand. Pia was a frequent visitor of the street side market in Borivali and
she knew the rates as well. As she went to the college she brisked the shirts
and jeans in an imagination of what would look good on Mannu and in this
imagination she also enquired the price only to say later a price which was not
at all acceptable to the seller. The price range varied, but she was firm with
the colours that should colour Mannu’s wardrobe. A message popped up every
morning about a new combination that Mannu should look for that day. But Mannu
was a bit anxious about brands. Someday he came back with a pair of shoes and
the other day with a pair of branded jeans. From the golden times, a brand
purchase has always been proportional to money. Grand name, grand price!
Mothers don’t know this. They just have a simple question ‘Why pay 3 times more
for blue jeans which you can get for Rs. 500?’ Even so did Pia.
And because of this reluctance of
Mrs. K he got annoyed and came out of the store. It happened several times.
“Let’s go mummy...I don’t want
anything.”I spoke. Mrs. K said nothing, just grabbed his gloved arm and the
second time they exit the store with a smile on Mannus face. The blue jeans
cost him 2000 rupees. Mrs. K always purchased for her children, not only
commodities, but contentment. Channu too was amazed on seeing the price tag of
Mannu’s new wardrobe collection. He expressed it by swelling his lips and widening
his eyes. Mannu felt embarrased, but
happiness overcame. Mannu was 18 and Channu was 16. From infant to childhood,
from childhood to adolescence they had shared their clothes and belongings. Now
both had to separate them off. Today, time had really proved that it waits for
none.
The buying and bringing continued for
the whole day. Channu brought a lotion and forgot the shaving razor; Mannu
brought a deodorant and forgot the blades. Everything, but, was new for
personal use. On the other hand the postman had safely delivered the ticket. He
safely delivered silence and that too without any extra charge. With wet eyes
Mrs. K kept it on the mandir under a
portrait of Sai Baba.
For the kind attention of the passengers, Train no.
4853, Marudhar express, from Varanasi to Jodhpur is running late and is
expected to arrive at 3:00am.’
The delay had increased by 3 hours. Somehow, the three found a safe corner to hide themselves from the tears of the sky. It was raining since evening. The Charbagh station had become a shelter house for a large populace of the city. People were still running to catch the trains. The whole platform looked like a dustbin with banana peels scattered all around. Rains and the peels had done a perfect job of making people watch their feet rather than the bogies of the trains. Tea sellers were sitting relaxed and contended, some with a biri in their hands. The never ending rains had helped them complete their sales in a very short time. The rains had shut down the Aloo Puri stalls.To kill time and hunger, people were eating biscuits and most of the girls had a book in one hand and a coke in the other. Mrs. K, Mannu and Channu had come after dinner as was the usual routine for most that were to board the Marudhar express. But it was 2 a.m. in the morning and bellies of the young boys were again demanding something. Mannu wet and purchased a packet of biscuit and fruit cakes. The ac coach travellers had some uncommon eatables in their hands. For them Coke was a necessity even in the rains. It was a strange sight for Mannu. But the purpose was common; to kill the innocent time. From the past three and half hours the same events followed. A train came on the rail track and every step moved towards the horizontal end of the platform. They slanged each other, pulled others just to grab some space on the non moving berth. Why not? Occupying a berth was much vital than saving humanity and humbleness. It was a show to watch. Mannu wondered where and why so many people go and that too at the same time? It was a silly soliloquoy!Every human out there was eager to reach his destination as soon as possible, but God had again played a strange game. Neither was Mannu able to stay here, nor was he able to leave. The train was to arrive at any moment. He raised the volume of the music player to equanimize himself. Mrs. K sat sleepy and silent. Channu was also bus with his music player. Sleep had over passed his eyes.“Mannu...?”Mrs. K spoke just as Mannu removed the headphones.“Hmmmm...”replied Mannu, partially busy in winding the wires.“Listen carefully...Now you’re going out...Don’t spend lavishly...And call home twice a day. Eat properly...And did you take some aspirin???”“Yes mummy...”Came Mannu’s dull reply.“Good...take care of your headache...Study hard and sleep on time and...“Ok...Ok mummy...Relax...I’ll be fine...You have already given these instructions so many times. I know mummy.”Mannu was both anxious and a bit upset to enter a new life. Every debt was clear. Even Vivi had forgiven 400 rupees. The inbox of Mannu’s mobile phone was filled with Pia’s messages. Since evening she was curious to know the happenings.‘Did u keep everythn jaan???’Message 238:‘At what time u’ll reach 2morow???Did d train come and did u eat nethn???’Message 250:‘U’re alryt jaan???reply plzzzzz....u know your silence keeps me awake... ’Mannu scrolled through the inbox to keep himself calm. There was something in every message of Pia which made him forget rest of the world. Unknowingly, reading her messages again and again had become his habit.The night had opened every door to welcome the morning. The three were totally exhausted. The watch showed 04:00am. Every other moment mummy said,“Don’t go today Mannu...” and he just repeated “Ek na ek din to jana hi hai, I have to leave one day or the other...”Pia’s messages still kept the mobile vibrating.The hustle at the station had subdued. People were asleep on their baggage, some who lived nearby had left back home. The waiting hall was full. All the eyes around were sleepy, devoid of hope. The journey had become a nightmare. Mannu had also fallen asleep in bits. Dreams passed him in the fifteen twenty minute long naps. A long time ago when he was away from the stars, he wanted to have one. He asked God about its cost. He smiled back, but gave nothing to Mannu. Few years later, God asked him to have one. Mannu was delighted. Mannu’s smile gave Him some answer, only He knows what and the magic started. The world started shrinking. The star was coming near Mannu. Mannu’s old wish was just one step away from being his reality. That old star for which he had longed for years was calling but Mannu was unable to move. Only one question revolved in Mannu’s mind,“Now, do I want it or not?”“Mannu...Mannu...”Mrs. K’s faint voice was heard. Mannu opened his eyes abruptly! Oh...he was still at the Charbagh station with sleep in his eyes. As he opened his eyes he saw people had started hanging luggage on their backs. Others checked their pockets, back pockets. Channu was standing next to him with the bags on his shoulders. Mrs. K was busy checking whether the locks were intact. Mannu couldn’t understand what was happening. He went back to sleep again, rested back on the seat and closed his eyes, but Mrs.K shook him again. He closed his eyes again. The wakeup call was unusual. He could trust my sub conscious that it was not Mrs. K’s voice. With his eyes half closed and mouth open he was on the verge of falling down from the bench.Paaawwwww....Paaawwwwww...It was the sound that resembled the last bell of a man’s life. Some reflex actions forced him to open his drowsy eyes. Yes. And the long wait was over. Train no. 4853 was standing still in front. The wind on the station swayed every one away in the same direction that led towards the twin way entry-exit of the train.The stomach ache had become unbearable. Mrs. K and Channu were waiting for the restless mob to come to rest. Mannu was still lying numb on the bench. He needed home, He needed his mother’s lap. Oh God...The moment had made him asthmatic. He lost the courage to stand, to walk till the other end of the platform.“Come on Mannu...Pick that bag. It’s too heavy for me.”Mrs. K spoke with an effort to lift that bag.“Yaa...Yaa..gimme...”Mannu said in a heavy voice, wiping the sweat balls rather sweat volley ball’s from his frowned face. The ten step walk to the train seemed much longer than several yards. But he was helpless. There was no chance to escape the moment, but to drag his feet to enter the new life. The whole world around him was silent after occupying the fraction of seat which was much more than the amount they had paid for it. Mannu checked out the passport to his new real world. Seat no. 19, Coach no. S4. After setting the bags and baggage to sleep, he was able to spare a moment with Mrs. K and Channu.“Separation brings sufferings...I know. Sufferings bring me a heart ache mummy.”Mannu spoke and paused for a while.“Your son has grown older. When he has a heart ache...He just smiles.”said Mannu smilingly with his eyes fixed on his shoes. He had talked to Mr. K and took his blessings. He heard his father’s sobs for the first time. Mr. K was upset on being absent on his son’s farewell from home. But he, too, was helpless. Leave had been cancelled twice. Mrs. K hugged him, kissed on the fore head, the left and the right cheek and gazed at Mannu as if he was never coming back. It was the first time when Mannu didn’t erase the red lipstick marks. The insider within him had shown its new face.Change had actuated. The signal turned green. Mannu’s heart, it seemed, was out its place. Somehow he managed to keep that smile. Channu hugged him.“No pain...”Mannu spoke to him with their fists tightly blocked.“No gain...”He said in a pretentious voice. Eyes are the tongue of your heart. Channu didn’t show his nervousness, but his eyes had a golden glow.The siren blew. Mrs. K wiped her eyes and tried to erase the lipstick marks on Mannu’s face by her fingers. The mobile phone in his pocket was still awake by Pia’s messages. Time was running faster than thoughts. The final whistle blew and the black smoke filled the sky. Mannu hung out from the doors. Mrs. K and Channu walked with the train.“I’m not alone...”Mannu said to them in a high tone. They just kept on looking.“I have memories...”He said to himself. The train paced up and all he could see was their blurred faces and waving hands. They didn’t signify a bye, but a comeback call. Again Mannu shouted at the top of his broken voice.“See you soon...but not yet, not yet...”He was left with no courage to open his eyes and face the new real world around. Most of the passengers were asleep. Darkness and loneliness were like brothers who never left hands. Mannu checked the heavy locks on the bags and lay down. Fear had started to roll up now. He couldn’t sustain the smile on his face. Visuals of mummy, home and everything that he had left and everything that he was leaving further, kept him wide awake. The slide show of memories skated from past to the present, present to the past and from past to the future. In the sub conscious state, he could see no future from the present.Life had not yet stopped teaching lessons. He got to know the architecture of life rather the two phases that make it. One which always keeps an eye on you just like the moon that was visible from behind the bars of the train window. Another one silently waits for you to search it, see it and live it just like the next morning.
If only one cardiac muscle and only one neuron of yours makes you think that God is the ultimate doer of all good, one day He will surely make you a believer. The morning star of Mannu’s new real world up ahead and the smile on his face was back again. The wind was warmer and the heat much more intense.The ditched city streets of the Pink City, Jaipur, inclined the auto rickshaw three times towards the left and five times towards the right. The sunlight penetrated in and out the dark shed of the auto. As a child welcomes a guest at his home by smiling and peeping from behind his mother’s back, the same way the sun peeped at Mannu, in and out, from the motherly skies. He was enjoying this welcome. The trip had been uneventful as Mannu kept on sleeping for the whole journey. Only once did he open his eyes to produce the ticket and identity proof to the TTE. Visit to the toilet had become a compulsion but he resisted facing the darkness around. He woke up at around 6 in the morning when the calls of chaiwalla disturbed his imagination. His heart said that he was one step closer to his forever love. He tried calling Mrs. K, but the call didn’t connect. With a diary and pen he took a window side and started writing. Drowsiness had still not left his eyes.Every city has its local taste. The Pink City too, had its own flavour. After driving several 100 metres one had to save the vehicle’s front tyre from the gates of a mandir and the feet of the pujaris. Mandirs seemed more crowded than cafeterias and food parlours. Truly, God asks nothing more than a Rs.1.50 laddoo . The local auto driver, considering Mannu a guest, named every structure of the city as it passed which included the choti chaupad and the badi chaupad. They were much more a leisure island for the cows of the city rather being a chauraha. The auto passed the Hawa Mahal. Temple bells near it heightened the confusion around that place. A queue of worshippers made the traffic come to halt. Bangles, traditional decoratives, dresses, foot wears were being sold around. Pink had be friend several other colours. The shops were surrounded by foreign faces who were mesmerized by the architectural and monumental beauty of Hawa Mahal and the artistry of objects being sold. Their hanging jaws, loud expressions added another speechless compliment. Every other local man had a sense of simplicity on his face and an aura dipped in Krishna’s bhakti.
Moving on the way to the Institute of Engineering and Technology they passed another treasure of the city, the Jal Mahal. Ornamented by the necklace of a water lake, the Midas touch of the sun had further turned every drop golden. It seemed as if the Mahal had worn extra glace of gold to welcome Mannu. Mannu had no other way to say a shukriya, thank you, except remembering it forever. Camels and elephants had become a common sight. Here too, tourists from foreign countries were enjoying the ride, getting pictures clicked through the long and heavy lens of their cameras. Ditches had vanished so Mannu took out the water bottle and drank some water. The hills had few green patches on them.The aroma of kachoris, mirchi bada, from toadside dhabas entered Mannu’s nostrils. The driver had stopped to buy tobacco and bidi . A folk song played loud on the stereo but the men exchanged greetings undisturbed. Their laughs overcame the vocals. Mannu steeped down, splashed some water on his face and they were ready to move again.“Ye Amber ka Qila hai dost, This is the Amber Palace my friend.” The auto driver spoke up pointing his finger towards the left. Mannu nodded his head, unable to find words of reverence for the Qila’s grandiosity. He gazed at it until they crossed its 200 metre stretch. The lake in front was swampy with a green algal coat. On the outside it was lined by auto rickshaws and elephants. Tourists flocked the whole place. The delicacies served here were also the same kachori, mirchi bada, and ghevar. The rate cards hung outside the shop with discounted prices written big and bold. A long queue at the ATM had caused a roadblock. The auto drivers were constantly shouting at the roadside shopkeepers. If not for them much of the space would have been saved. A florist was trying to hide the flowers from the black puff of smoke. Mannu’s auto driver greeted him and he kept a five rupees packet of flower on the dashboard. “Saab paanch rupee...” The driver asked Mannu. He was confused. Why was he to pay for that packet?“Saab paanch rupee...”The driver asked again. The honking of the vehicles forced Mannu to act hurriedly and the transaction was done. Mannu asked the driver to hand him the packet. There was no aroma from the flowers. The colour was faded. But what could be done now? The destination was minutes away when Mannu’s cell phone beeped. It was Pia. She was anxious to know about Mannu’s situation.“Did you like Jaipur?”These were her first words which even escaped a hello or hi.“Ya...its good...but Pia...I am missing you more now...”spoke Mannu in return.“Oh my baby....don’t worry...Now when you’re in Jaipur I’m sure we’ll meet very soon...”“Hmmmm....I hope the same.” Her voice had gathered much charm and anxiety.For the second time God’s words had proved their trueness. You win something, you lose the other. You lose something, you win the other. Far away from home, leaving all the things behind, this was the only thought of hope that was to keep Mannu full of life. He was going to meet Pia.“Shukriya...” Mannu said to the auto driver as he helped him unload the belongings.“Rs.150 se kuch kam hoga ???” Mannu asked him.“Nai saab, No sir...”He replied and Mannu immediately paid him the amount.“Shukriya aapka....”Mannu said again, standing in front of the gates of the Institute of Engineering and Technology, the college of his destiny.“Ram Ram Sa...”The driver said and left.The campus was a bit familiar to Mannu as he had gone through the institute’s website several times in the past few days. After reaching there it was confirmed that the pictures posted there were real and seeing the real reflection, Mannu developed a sense o f intimacy with the playground, the class building and the hostels. One of Pia’s relatives had passed out from the same college. She had suggested several names from the faculty if needed in case of emergency. After entering the gates he was greeted by some new faces. “Hey...1st year?” came a unanimous query. And Mannu came out only with a yes, moving steadily towards the admission hall. The grunt of the rolling suitcase accompanied him. Nervousness too!“Where’s the way to the admission hall?”Mannu asked a group of boys sitting at the T junctions of the pathway. A silly chatter began among them.“There” said a tall guy pointing his finger towards the entrance gate of the college.“I’m asking about the admission hall.”He asked again unable to decide whether to move or wait for the answer.“Here we ask the questions boy..Got it?Got it?” A bearded boy spoke from among them.“Hmm.” Came Mannu’s humble reply.“What Hmm? Have some manners boy. Say I got it Sir. I got it Sir.” Mannu could think of no other option, but to toe his line. The change in Mannu’s life was showing its ugly face; bearded, dark, surrounded with a puff of smoke.“I got it Sir.”Mannu answered and waited in anticipation of being told the way to the admission hall.“Boy we are five here not one. Say it to each one of us and with your right hand on your head. Chal shuru ho ja.” And Mannu had to toe his line, again. The start would be so fatal was not expected. Giggles and clap of high five’s of the passer’s by increased the anxiety within Mannu. Sweat dripped from his forehead onto the suitcase. Home was so better. But it was six hundred kilometres away now. The reality was that there was no running away from this insult. As Mannu had completed the order given he was told the way. His water bottle was emptied by the group and he did not dare ask the way to the water cooler. Silently he rushed to the admission hall without looking sideways.“Why were the passer’s by laughing, giggling? What were they thinking about me?” These introspective questions crushed his confidence. Going by the sign boards he finally found the admission hall. It was a place of discipline. Portraits of inventors, scientists and plated quotations decorated the walls. And boys, in formals, were sitting at one side and girls in salwar suits beautified the other side of the admission counter.It was the safest spot for the new comers, preferably called Fresher’s or simply ‘first year’. Water was being served in jugs and Mannu gulped a portion from one without even being seated. The registration process was a task of several signatures, verification of documents, photograph, and identity proof. The fresher’s were directed to keep all the documents ready. So the fresher’s, in a mechanical fashion, had kept the files and folders on their lap and most of them sat alert, but confused. A few of the boys were busy finding the best among the girls, the most fair, the tallest, slimmest and the most beautiful and some of them were moving in and out of the hall in turns. It seemed that they knew some seniors and that company gave them escape from the general code of conduct. Mannu found a backseat with empty sides, took out the document folder and kept it on his lap. After wiping the sweat from his face he could find courage to turn around and take a breath of relief. “Mannu...Mannu...”A female voice was heard. Everyone was looking around as it was the seond call for Mannu.“Mannu. Admission from Lucknow.”Abruptly Mannu stood up and down went the folder and the hanky.“Yes, Yes Mam...Mannu” He spoke loudly with a raised hand. Heads turned towards him and restlessness took control of him. For a while he dragged the suitcase with him, but he stopped suddenly rethinking whether he should carry the bag with him or not. The female voice was heard again saying, “Leave your bags there. Pick up the folder and hurry up.”“Yes Yes Mam.”Head were still turned towards him. This kept the restlessness high.“Good morning Mam”“Afternoon. Class twelfth mark sheet?”The lady enquired. He produced it and secretly looked the time by his watch. It was almost one.“Five passport size photographs. Coloured.” He produced them.“Oho...I need one with a white background.” She sighed and showed Mannu the instructions. It was clearly written, but this instruction page was not to be found on the website. He came out with no answer. She waited for a while, looked at him again, nodded her head in disdain and carried on with the pasting them on different forms. A cross signature on each of the photograph was demanded. Meanwhile she sipped tea and made a sarcastic comment about the fresher’s with her colleague who was busy stapling photographs of a girl. These rounds of comments had made Mannu upset. To further add to it he was given a medical form which had to be signed by a doctor from a government hospital.“Excuse me Mam where can I find the doctor?”“Yaa. You will find a bus from the main gate. Tell the driver to drop you at Amber medical dispensary.”This was like a shock for him. He thought that the doctor would be available in some different hall. But a bigger distance had to be travelled. Fortunately, the room number was allotted, but accommodation was to be finalised only after submission of the medical form. It had to be done by evening.Keeping the luggage in a store room the fresher’s were lined up to board the bus. There was chatter, giggle and sudden silence in the queue on the order of seniors. Every bus was under the command of a senior and this restricted the exchange of greetings among the new comers to short, but prompt hi and hello. The dispensary was on the same route that Mannu had travelled to reach the college. Barren mountains surrounded the national highway and the young hopeful faces.“Step down one by one and maintain silence.” The senior spoke aloud. He was a short guy with an unusual dressing in front of the fresher’s who were looking suave in formals. But his command was duly respected and a queue, separate for girls and boys was formed outside the dispensary. It was the same place where Mannu had made the flower purchase. Next to it a glimpse of the grand Amber palace could be stolen. The senior went in to meet the doctor. Immediately the anxiety in the young students gave way.“Hey...I’m Dev from Chandigarh.”“Mannu from lucknow. Hi”“Shubh from Kota, Hi. How do you find Rajasthan?”“Not so hot as I had expected and not so barren as I have seen in posters.” Mannu replied, wiping the sweat and keeping an alert eye on the entrance of the dispensary.“Ohh..that’s the western part. Here it is easy and...”Shubh had to stop suddenly as the senior had arrived. He called the names one by one and the formality was completed within an hour. The journey back to the college was dull. Mannu again found a backseat and nostalgia over gripped him. Vivi was missing, the streets of Lucknow,the jalebi’s of Chotelal had been replaced by age old mountains and ghevar. But the thought of Pia gave him strength to befriend the place. Just the thought that Pia had a connection with this place made him comfortable, made him miss Lucknow, a little less.After collecting the baggage the fresher’s were directed to respective hostels. Shubh had been called to Hostel number 3 and Mannu was allotted hostel number 2, just in front of the third year students. Mannu went in the three storey building. His room was on the first floor. Room number 510. The rooms were for twin occupancy. As he entered he saw that one side had already been occupied, mattress laid and a few books lay on the study table. Almirah was tightly locked. But it gave him no idea about who was his room partner. He missed Channu, thought about the playfulness they had in their room as he unloaded the luggage with a heavy heart. There was an almirah, a cot, a pair of table and chair. That’s it. Mannu was lucky to have a attached bathroom. He was tired. He opened the window which was on the side of the yet unknown room partner and sat there for a while, sipping water. The building of another hostel was visible, only walls.“The moon would never be visible from here.” He said to himself and went in to check the bathroom. It was clean and properly lit. After washing himself he simply put the suitcase in the almirah and locked it up. The new life had begun. It was plain, limited, but the beginning of Mannu’s career. He called Mrs. K, Mr. K, answered their impatient queries in a relaxed manner and went to sleep till he heard the knocking on the room.“Are you Mannu?” Asked the boy. He was plum, dark and tall. He wore a Reebok cap, track suit and shoes of the same brand and had a very big electronic gadget in his hand. Mannu became nervous. His mind started comparing his condition with the boy.“Yes...I’m Mannu from Lucknow. And you? Come in please. Are you staying in this room?”“Boss boy. Call me Raghav Boss. I’m your senior. Don’t you wish your senior?”“Good...Good evening Sir. Sorry Boss. Good evening boss.” replied Mannu, leaving the handle bar of the door and facing the senior in an alert attitude.“Reach the playground in 5 mintues. T shirt, shorts and black formal shoes.” And he went to the next room. Till Mannu could understand what had happened, time had already started ticking. He opened the suitcase and quickly took out the shorts and T shirt. It was an embarrassing combination, but it was the order for the evening. Mannu locked the room and went out. There was silence in the corridor. After a while he saw a boy coming downstairs. He was wearing a kurta pyjama on running shoes. Like Mannu, he too looked horrible. This came as a jolt to both of them. And exchanging greeting only through smiles they reached the playground, which seemed covered with circus artists or better recognized as the first year.Running rounds in formal shoes was not an easy task, nor was it was it easy to play volleyball in kurta pyjama. It was even more difficult to play football in a blazer, that too in the summers and it was very tiring to play leg cricket in plated trousers. And the seniors were having a good time. It was the start of spring for them. Commanding a group of fresher’s they were sitting, watching the circus go on and the whole college was lined up on the play ground boundaries. Mannu was hurt. The new shoes had started biting him, but stopping or retiring was to be punished by an extra round so he never dared to do so.“Welcome to your new life. As you finish the order of your senior, line up in front of the mess.” An announcement, from some corner, was heard. And the same followed, almost mechanically. Queues were made. Again, separate for girls who were giggling and passing smiles at the boys. The mess was near hostel number 2. In strict discipline the evening snacks were offered. The seniors had occupied all the benches. Thus the show went on even in the mess. No interaction could follow among the fresher’s. Sipping tea and gulping the aloo pakoda all were asked to go back to respective rooms.“Hey...I’m Vipul. I’m from Delhi.” He was Mannu’s room partner.“Mannu... from Lucknow.” The letter V was following him. Mannu smiled and started unpacking the suitcase.“Did you come today?”Vipul asked Mannu while changing. He was in formals over bathroom slippers.“Ya...feeling very tired yaar...”“Hmmm..You must be. Take some rest. Catch you later buddy.”Vipul said and left the room. Mannu immediately checked the mobile phone. There were three missed calls from Pia. But all he could do was to wait for her to call again. Introducing himself in front of the seniors six to even fifteen times in an hour, Mannu’s face, his complete body and even his hanky had become a store house for sweat. The style of introduction was unique. The fresher’s had to say their name in English, their father’s name in Hindi. Walking on the ladder of English and Hindi, the first year tumbled on every step and each time one had to start from the beginning. Mannu as well as the other boys couldn’t figure out the real motive of this ‘introduction act’ from the faces of the seniors’ aka the real BOSSES of the college. One thing that Mannu could actually realize was that he was nothing except the five letter name. Repeating ‘Mannu’ times and times again, he doubted why and how did he exist for so long? Oh momma!!! He never wanted to be see-n-ear a senior.As a usual routine they had to be dressed in formals the whole day, lined up straight like the Qutub Minar even to fill their stomachs. One wouldn’t mind not wishing the faculties, but no fresher could escape the bosses without a ‘Good morning Boss’, ‘Good evening Boss’ or sometimes why not a ‘Go to hell Boss!!!’ Stand by their permission and leave by theirs. One had to kill his free will to survive. Mannu and similarly the other boys were missing home and on the way to the mess, home delicacies were eagerly remembered. Mrs. K had cooked biryani, but Channu had informed Mannu that she didn’t eat and even cried on the table. Mannu had become so busy that he could not talk to her, hours after the knowing that she cried. He knew the cause. He also knew the solution, but he was kept occupied in silly activities and mobile phone was to kept back at the room. Missed calss from Pia had become more frequent. The melodrama ended by late night which left no scope to call back either at home or to Pia. Mannu had to sleep with guilt. Life had shown its second phase. Everything here was dipped in the lake of change.The two seat, two almirah and two tabled room number 510 was his new hideout. God had had some petty on him as Vipul, was also from the same branch, Electronics and Communication. Vipul, had a flat long nose and only his French style beard could support it. They both had same music interests, literary interests and they were even of the same height. Sitting in the corridor, they listened to only one song, but for hours. The whole corridor was mostly filled by the ECians. Mannu was named Slash by everyone for his guitar playing.Evenings passed but Mannu found few minutes, without forget, to talk at home. They were concerned about the meals, the health and safety of Mannu. They were missing him more than he was missing them. Only Mannu knew the pain he had buried in his heart. But there was the brighter side of life. Pia was much happier of his being in Jaipur. Now Mannu had no fear of mummy and her daily questions ‘Kiska phone tha?’, but the time to talk was unavailable.The lectures had begun after a formal introduction. The class had a strength of 60 with seven girls only. Tea had replaced the morning cup of milk. Hurriedly every guy from the hostel ran towards the classes to seat himself next to the future female engineers. On the first day itself boys had come out with a special theory on communication. They believed that how could they study topics on communication if they had no one to speak, no one to communicate? The main focus was on the practical application of theory. Every young impatient heart had only one thought in his head and on his lips.“Bhai!!!ye wali mast hai!!!, Brother, this girl is awesome!!!”The very next moment, thoughts changed.“Bha!!!.ye wali bhi mast hai!!!, Brother, this girl is also awesome!!!”
This continued the whole day long. It was the third day and long term relations were set for half of the class. Anticipation of love had made the boys punctual and smartly dressed. Mannu dreamed of Pia in every girl that he looked and sometimes in every girl he gazed. On the academic front terminologies had evolved. Periods were now lectures. Mathematics was now engineering mathematics. The grading system was such that no one failed. Strange, isn’t it? They just secured ‘backs’. Maybe, ‘backs’ didn’t hurt the conscience of the students. Vipul, Shubh and several other boys had started casual interaction with the girls during lecture breaks. A few from the rural background were busy among themselves. Being non proficient in English, they preferred to have a whole boys group. Mannu’s interaction with the girls was also limited as he used the breaks to reply to the long messages to Pia, who had brought a new number for herself. She had risked her mother’s passport to get a new sim card. As and when her mother was out she replaced the sim card, called or messaged Mannu and again put things back to safety. A confirmation call from the operator had been missed and it had created some confusion in her house. Pia’s mother picked up the call and refused to confirm the details. But luckily the sim card was made operational. The long day ended with introductory lectures. The evening was again set for the circus. It had to continue for a month as told by Vipul who had some senior’s as school mates. As a consequence he was now being saved of mockery. Instead he sat among the seniors and watched his colleagues perform the absurd show. This created some ill feelings among most of the boys. Vipul was seen as an outsider. He seemed to be one among the bosses. Also, he only came to sleep at the room and rest of the time he was busy outside the hostel either at the canteen, where the fresher’s were not allowed to enter yet or in the gym where again the entry for fresher’s was barred.
The delay had increased by 3 hours. Somehow, the three found a safe corner to hide themselves from the tears of the sky. It was raining since evening. The Charbagh station had become a shelter house for a large populace of the city. People were still running to catch the trains. The whole platform looked like a dustbin with banana peels scattered all around. Rains and the peels had done a perfect job of making people watch their feet rather than the bogies of the trains. Tea sellers were sitting relaxed and contended, some with a biri in their hands. The never ending rains had helped them complete their sales in a very short time. The rains had shut down the Aloo Puri stalls.To kill time and hunger, people were eating biscuits and most of the girls had a book in one hand and a coke in the other. Mrs. K, Mannu and Channu had come after dinner as was the usual routine for most that were to board the Marudhar express. But it was 2 a.m. in the morning and bellies of the young boys were again demanding something. Mannu wet and purchased a packet of biscuit and fruit cakes. The ac coach travellers had some uncommon eatables in their hands. For them Coke was a necessity even in the rains. It was a strange sight for Mannu. But the purpose was common; to kill the innocent time. From the past three and half hours the same events followed. A train came on the rail track and every step moved towards the horizontal end of the platform. They slanged each other, pulled others just to grab some space on the non moving berth. Why not? Occupying a berth was much vital than saving humanity and humbleness. It was a show to watch. Mannu wondered where and why so many people go and that too at the same time? It was a silly soliloquoy!Every human out there was eager to reach his destination as soon as possible, but God had again played a strange game. Neither was Mannu able to stay here, nor was he able to leave. The train was to arrive at any moment. He raised the volume of the music player to equanimize himself. Mrs. K sat sleepy and silent. Channu was also bus with his music player. Sleep had over passed his eyes.“Mannu...?”Mrs. K spoke just as Mannu removed the headphones.“Hmmmm...”replied Mannu, partially busy in winding the wires.“Listen carefully...Now you’re going out...Don’t spend lavishly...And call home twice a day. Eat properly...And did you take some aspirin???”“Yes mummy...”Came Mannu’s dull reply.“Good...take care of your headache...Study hard and sleep on time and...“Ok...Ok mummy...Relax...I’ll be fine...You have already given these instructions so many times. I know mummy.”Mannu was both anxious and a bit upset to enter a new life. Every debt was clear. Even Vivi had forgiven 400 rupees. The inbox of Mannu’s mobile phone was filled with Pia’s messages. Since evening she was curious to know the happenings.‘Did u keep everythn jaan???’Message 238:‘At what time u’ll reach 2morow???Did d train come and did u eat nethn???’Message 250:‘U’re alryt jaan???reply plzzzzz....u know your silence keeps me awake... ’Mannu scrolled through the inbox to keep himself calm. There was something in every message of Pia which made him forget rest of the world. Unknowingly, reading her messages again and again had become his habit.The night had opened every door to welcome the morning. The three were totally exhausted. The watch showed 04:00am. Every other moment mummy said,“Don’t go today Mannu...” and he just repeated “Ek na ek din to jana hi hai, I have to leave one day or the other...”Pia’s messages still kept the mobile vibrating.The hustle at the station had subdued. People were asleep on their baggage, some who lived nearby had left back home. The waiting hall was full. All the eyes around were sleepy, devoid of hope. The journey had become a nightmare. Mannu had also fallen asleep in bits. Dreams passed him in the fifteen twenty minute long naps. A long time ago when he was away from the stars, he wanted to have one. He asked God about its cost. He smiled back, but gave nothing to Mannu. Few years later, God asked him to have one. Mannu was delighted. Mannu’s smile gave Him some answer, only He knows what and the magic started. The world started shrinking. The star was coming near Mannu. Mannu’s old wish was just one step away from being his reality. That old star for which he had longed for years was calling but Mannu was unable to move. Only one question revolved in Mannu’s mind,“Now, do I want it or not?”“Mannu...Mannu...”Mrs. K’s faint voice was heard. Mannu opened his eyes abruptly! Oh...he was still at the Charbagh station with sleep in his eyes. As he opened his eyes he saw people had started hanging luggage on their backs. Others checked their pockets, back pockets. Channu was standing next to him with the bags on his shoulders. Mrs. K was busy checking whether the locks were intact. Mannu couldn’t understand what was happening. He went back to sleep again, rested back on the seat and closed his eyes, but Mrs.K shook him again. He closed his eyes again. The wakeup call was unusual. He could trust my sub conscious that it was not Mrs. K’s voice. With his eyes half closed and mouth open he was on the verge of falling down from the bench.Paaawwwww....Paaawwwwww...It was the sound that resembled the last bell of a man’s life. Some reflex actions forced him to open his drowsy eyes. Yes. And the long wait was over. Train no. 4853 was standing still in front. The wind on the station swayed every one away in the same direction that led towards the twin way entry-exit of the train.The stomach ache had become unbearable. Mrs. K and Channu were waiting for the restless mob to come to rest. Mannu was still lying numb on the bench. He needed home, He needed his mother’s lap. Oh God...The moment had made him asthmatic. He lost the courage to stand, to walk till the other end of the platform.“Come on Mannu...Pick that bag. It’s too heavy for me.”Mrs. K spoke with an effort to lift that bag.“Yaa...Yaa..gimme...”Mannu said in a heavy voice, wiping the sweat balls rather sweat volley ball’s from his frowned face. The ten step walk to the train seemed much longer than several yards. But he was helpless. There was no chance to escape the moment, but to drag his feet to enter the new life. The whole world around him was silent after occupying the fraction of seat which was much more than the amount they had paid for it. Mannu checked out the passport to his new real world. Seat no. 19, Coach no. S4. After setting the bags and baggage to sleep, he was able to spare a moment with Mrs. K and Channu.“Separation brings sufferings...I know. Sufferings bring me a heart ache mummy.”Mannu spoke and paused for a while.“Your son has grown older. When he has a heart ache...He just smiles.”said Mannu smilingly with his eyes fixed on his shoes. He had talked to Mr. K and took his blessings. He heard his father’s sobs for the first time. Mr. K was upset on being absent on his son’s farewell from home. But he, too, was helpless. Leave had been cancelled twice. Mrs. K hugged him, kissed on the fore head, the left and the right cheek and gazed at Mannu as if he was never coming back. It was the first time when Mannu didn’t erase the red lipstick marks. The insider within him had shown its new face.Change had actuated. The signal turned green. Mannu’s heart, it seemed, was out its place. Somehow he managed to keep that smile. Channu hugged him.“No pain...”Mannu spoke to him with their fists tightly blocked.“No gain...”He said in a pretentious voice. Eyes are the tongue of your heart. Channu didn’t show his nervousness, but his eyes had a golden glow.The siren blew. Mrs. K wiped her eyes and tried to erase the lipstick marks on Mannu’s face by her fingers. The mobile phone in his pocket was still awake by Pia’s messages. Time was running faster than thoughts. The final whistle blew and the black smoke filled the sky. Mannu hung out from the doors. Mrs. K and Channu walked with the train.“I’m not alone...”Mannu said to them in a high tone. They just kept on looking.“I have memories...”He said to himself. The train paced up and all he could see was their blurred faces and waving hands. They didn’t signify a bye, but a comeback call. Again Mannu shouted at the top of his broken voice.“See you soon...but not yet, not yet...”He was left with no courage to open his eyes and face the new real world around. Most of the passengers were asleep. Darkness and loneliness were like brothers who never left hands. Mannu checked the heavy locks on the bags and lay down. Fear had started to roll up now. He couldn’t sustain the smile on his face. Visuals of mummy, home and everything that he had left and everything that he was leaving further, kept him wide awake. The slide show of memories skated from past to the present, present to the past and from past to the future. In the sub conscious state, he could see no future from the present.Life had not yet stopped teaching lessons. He got to know the architecture of life rather the two phases that make it. One which always keeps an eye on you just like the moon that was visible from behind the bars of the train window. Another one silently waits for you to search it, see it and live it just like the next morning.
If only one cardiac muscle and only one neuron of yours makes you think that God is the ultimate doer of all good, one day He will surely make you a believer. The morning star of Mannu’s new real world up ahead and the smile on his face was back again. The wind was warmer and the heat much more intense.The ditched city streets of the Pink City, Jaipur, inclined the auto rickshaw three times towards the left and five times towards the right. The sunlight penetrated in and out the dark shed of the auto. As a child welcomes a guest at his home by smiling and peeping from behind his mother’s back, the same way the sun peeped at Mannu, in and out, from the motherly skies. He was enjoying this welcome. The trip had been uneventful as Mannu kept on sleeping for the whole journey. Only once did he open his eyes to produce the ticket and identity proof to the TTE. Visit to the toilet had become a compulsion but he resisted facing the darkness around. He woke up at around 6 in the morning when the calls of chaiwalla disturbed his imagination. His heart said that he was one step closer to his forever love. He tried calling Mrs. K, but the call didn’t connect. With a diary and pen he took a window side and started writing. Drowsiness had still not left his eyes.Every city has its local taste. The Pink City too, had its own flavour. After driving several 100 metres one had to save the vehicle’s front tyre from the gates of a mandir and the feet of the pujaris. Mandirs seemed more crowded than cafeterias and food parlours. Truly, God asks nothing more than a Rs.1.50 laddoo . The local auto driver, considering Mannu a guest, named every structure of the city as it passed which included the choti chaupad and the badi chaupad. They were much more a leisure island for the cows of the city rather being a chauraha. The auto passed the Hawa Mahal. Temple bells near it heightened the confusion around that place. A queue of worshippers made the traffic come to halt. Bangles, traditional decoratives, dresses, foot wears were being sold around. Pink had be friend several other colours. The shops were surrounded by foreign faces who were mesmerized by the architectural and monumental beauty of Hawa Mahal and the artistry of objects being sold. Their hanging jaws, loud expressions added another speechless compliment. Every other local man had a sense of simplicity on his face and an aura dipped in Krishna’s bhakti.
Moving on the way to the Institute of Engineering and Technology they passed another treasure of the city, the Jal Mahal. Ornamented by the necklace of a water lake, the Midas touch of the sun had further turned every drop golden. It seemed as if the Mahal had worn extra glace of gold to welcome Mannu. Mannu had no other way to say a shukriya, thank you, except remembering it forever. Camels and elephants had become a common sight. Here too, tourists from foreign countries were enjoying the ride, getting pictures clicked through the long and heavy lens of their cameras. Ditches had vanished so Mannu took out the water bottle and drank some water. The hills had few green patches on them.The aroma of kachoris, mirchi bada, from toadside dhabas entered Mannu’s nostrils. The driver had stopped to buy tobacco and bidi . A folk song played loud on the stereo but the men exchanged greetings undisturbed. Their laughs overcame the vocals. Mannu steeped down, splashed some water on his face and they were ready to move again.“Ye Amber ka Qila hai dost, This is the Amber Palace my friend.” The auto driver spoke up pointing his finger towards the left. Mannu nodded his head, unable to find words of reverence for the Qila’s grandiosity. He gazed at it until they crossed its 200 metre stretch. The lake in front was swampy with a green algal coat. On the outside it was lined by auto rickshaws and elephants. Tourists flocked the whole place. The delicacies served here were also the same kachori, mirchi bada, and ghevar. The rate cards hung outside the shop with discounted prices written big and bold. A long queue at the ATM had caused a roadblock. The auto drivers were constantly shouting at the roadside shopkeepers. If not for them much of the space would have been saved. A florist was trying to hide the flowers from the black puff of smoke. Mannu’s auto driver greeted him and he kept a five rupees packet of flower on the dashboard. “Saab paanch rupee...” The driver asked Mannu. He was confused. Why was he to pay for that packet?“Saab paanch rupee...”The driver asked again. The honking of the vehicles forced Mannu to act hurriedly and the transaction was done. Mannu asked the driver to hand him the packet. There was no aroma from the flowers. The colour was faded. But what could be done now? The destination was minutes away when Mannu’s cell phone beeped. It was Pia. She was anxious to know about Mannu’s situation.“Did you like Jaipur?”These were her first words which even escaped a hello or hi.“Ya...its good...but Pia...I am missing you more now...”spoke Mannu in return.“Oh my baby....don’t worry...Now when you’re in Jaipur I’m sure we’ll meet very soon...”“Hmmmm....I hope the same.” Her voice had gathered much charm and anxiety.For the second time God’s words had proved their trueness. You win something, you lose the other. You lose something, you win the other. Far away from home, leaving all the things behind, this was the only thought of hope that was to keep Mannu full of life. He was going to meet Pia.“Shukriya...” Mannu said to the auto driver as he helped him unload the belongings.“Rs.150 se kuch kam hoga ???” Mannu asked him.“Nai saab, No sir...”He replied and Mannu immediately paid him the amount.“Shukriya aapka....”Mannu said again, standing in front of the gates of the Institute of Engineering and Technology, the college of his destiny.“Ram Ram Sa...”The driver said and left.The campus was a bit familiar to Mannu as he had gone through the institute’s website several times in the past few days. After reaching there it was confirmed that the pictures posted there were real and seeing the real reflection, Mannu developed a sense o f intimacy with the playground, the class building and the hostels. One of Pia’s relatives had passed out from the same college. She had suggested several names from the faculty if needed in case of emergency. After entering the gates he was greeted by some new faces. “Hey...1st year?” came a unanimous query. And Mannu came out only with a yes, moving steadily towards the admission hall. The grunt of the rolling suitcase accompanied him. Nervousness too!“Where’s the way to the admission hall?”Mannu asked a group of boys sitting at the T junctions of the pathway. A silly chatter began among them.“There” said a tall guy pointing his finger towards the entrance gate of the college.“I’m asking about the admission hall.”He asked again unable to decide whether to move or wait for the answer.“Here we ask the questions boy..Got it?Got it?” A bearded boy spoke from among them.“Hmm.” Came Mannu’s humble reply.“What Hmm? Have some manners boy. Say I got it Sir. I got it Sir.” Mannu could think of no other option, but to toe his line. The change in Mannu’s life was showing its ugly face; bearded, dark, surrounded with a puff of smoke.“I got it Sir.”Mannu answered and waited in anticipation of being told the way to the admission hall.“Boy we are five here not one. Say it to each one of us and with your right hand on your head. Chal shuru ho ja.” And Mannu had to toe his line, again. The start would be so fatal was not expected. Giggles and clap of high five’s of the passer’s by increased the anxiety within Mannu. Sweat dripped from his forehead onto the suitcase. Home was so better. But it was six hundred kilometres away now. The reality was that there was no running away from this insult. As Mannu had completed the order given he was told the way. His water bottle was emptied by the group and he did not dare ask the way to the water cooler. Silently he rushed to the admission hall without looking sideways.“Why were the passer’s by laughing, giggling? What were they thinking about me?” These introspective questions crushed his confidence. Going by the sign boards he finally found the admission hall. It was a place of discipline. Portraits of inventors, scientists and plated quotations decorated the walls. And boys, in formals, were sitting at one side and girls in salwar suits beautified the other side of the admission counter.It was the safest spot for the new comers, preferably called Fresher’s or simply ‘first year’. Water was being served in jugs and Mannu gulped a portion from one without even being seated. The registration process was a task of several signatures, verification of documents, photograph, and identity proof. The fresher’s were directed to keep all the documents ready. So the fresher’s, in a mechanical fashion, had kept the files and folders on their lap and most of them sat alert, but confused. A few of the boys were busy finding the best among the girls, the most fair, the tallest, slimmest and the most beautiful and some of them were moving in and out of the hall in turns. It seemed that they knew some seniors and that company gave them escape from the general code of conduct. Mannu found a backseat with empty sides, took out the document folder and kept it on his lap. After wiping the sweat from his face he could find courage to turn around and take a breath of relief. “Mannu...Mannu...”A female voice was heard. Everyone was looking around as it was the seond call for Mannu.“Mannu. Admission from Lucknow.”Abruptly Mannu stood up and down went the folder and the hanky.“Yes, Yes Mam...Mannu” He spoke loudly with a raised hand. Heads turned towards him and restlessness took control of him. For a while he dragged the suitcase with him, but he stopped suddenly rethinking whether he should carry the bag with him or not. The female voice was heard again saying, “Leave your bags there. Pick up the folder and hurry up.”“Yes Yes Mam.”Head were still turned towards him. This kept the restlessness high.“Good morning Mam”“Afternoon. Class twelfth mark sheet?”The lady enquired. He produced it and secretly looked the time by his watch. It was almost one.“Five passport size photographs. Coloured.” He produced them.“Oho...I need one with a white background.” She sighed and showed Mannu the instructions. It was clearly written, but this instruction page was not to be found on the website. He came out with no answer. She waited for a while, looked at him again, nodded her head in disdain and carried on with the pasting them on different forms. A cross signature on each of the photograph was demanded. Meanwhile she sipped tea and made a sarcastic comment about the fresher’s with her colleague who was busy stapling photographs of a girl. These rounds of comments had made Mannu upset. To further add to it he was given a medical form which had to be signed by a doctor from a government hospital.“Excuse me Mam where can I find the doctor?”“Yaa. You will find a bus from the main gate. Tell the driver to drop you at Amber medical dispensary.”This was like a shock for him. He thought that the doctor would be available in some different hall. But a bigger distance had to be travelled. Fortunately, the room number was allotted, but accommodation was to be finalised only after submission of the medical form. It had to be done by evening.Keeping the luggage in a store room the fresher’s were lined up to board the bus. There was chatter, giggle and sudden silence in the queue on the order of seniors. Every bus was under the command of a senior and this restricted the exchange of greetings among the new comers to short, but prompt hi and hello. The dispensary was on the same route that Mannu had travelled to reach the college. Barren mountains surrounded the national highway and the young hopeful faces.“Step down one by one and maintain silence.” The senior spoke aloud. He was a short guy with an unusual dressing in front of the fresher’s who were looking suave in formals. But his command was duly respected and a queue, separate for girls and boys was formed outside the dispensary. It was the same place where Mannu had made the flower purchase. Next to it a glimpse of the grand Amber palace could be stolen. The senior went in to meet the doctor. Immediately the anxiety in the young students gave way.“Hey...I’m Dev from Chandigarh.”“Mannu from lucknow. Hi”“Shubh from Kota, Hi. How do you find Rajasthan?”“Not so hot as I had expected and not so barren as I have seen in posters.” Mannu replied, wiping the sweat and keeping an alert eye on the entrance of the dispensary.“Ohh..that’s the western part. Here it is easy and...”Shubh had to stop suddenly as the senior had arrived. He called the names one by one and the formality was completed within an hour. The journey back to the college was dull. Mannu again found a backseat and nostalgia over gripped him. Vivi was missing, the streets of Lucknow,the jalebi’s of Chotelal had been replaced by age old mountains and ghevar. But the thought of Pia gave him strength to befriend the place. Just the thought that Pia had a connection with this place made him comfortable, made him miss Lucknow, a little less.After collecting the baggage the fresher’s were directed to respective hostels. Shubh had been called to Hostel number 3 and Mannu was allotted hostel number 2, just in front of the third year students. Mannu went in the three storey building. His room was on the first floor. Room number 510. The rooms were for twin occupancy. As he entered he saw that one side had already been occupied, mattress laid and a few books lay on the study table. Almirah was tightly locked. But it gave him no idea about who was his room partner. He missed Channu, thought about the playfulness they had in their room as he unloaded the luggage with a heavy heart. There was an almirah, a cot, a pair of table and chair. That’s it. Mannu was lucky to have a attached bathroom. He was tired. He opened the window which was on the side of the yet unknown room partner and sat there for a while, sipping water. The building of another hostel was visible, only walls.“The moon would never be visible from here.” He said to himself and went in to check the bathroom. It was clean and properly lit. After washing himself he simply put the suitcase in the almirah and locked it up. The new life had begun. It was plain, limited, but the beginning of Mannu’s career. He called Mrs. K, Mr. K, answered their impatient queries in a relaxed manner and went to sleep till he heard the knocking on the room.“Are you Mannu?” Asked the boy. He was plum, dark and tall. He wore a Reebok cap, track suit and shoes of the same brand and had a very big electronic gadget in his hand. Mannu became nervous. His mind started comparing his condition with the boy.“Yes...I’m Mannu from Lucknow. And you? Come in please. Are you staying in this room?”“Boss boy. Call me Raghav Boss. I’m your senior. Don’t you wish your senior?”“Good...Good evening Sir. Sorry Boss. Good evening boss.” replied Mannu, leaving the handle bar of the door and facing the senior in an alert attitude.“Reach the playground in 5 mintues. T shirt, shorts and black formal shoes.” And he went to the next room. Till Mannu could understand what had happened, time had already started ticking. He opened the suitcase and quickly took out the shorts and T shirt. It was an embarrassing combination, but it was the order for the evening. Mannu locked the room and went out. There was silence in the corridor. After a while he saw a boy coming downstairs. He was wearing a kurta pyjama on running shoes. Like Mannu, he too looked horrible. This came as a jolt to both of them. And exchanging greeting only through smiles they reached the playground, which seemed covered with circus artists or better recognized as the first year.Running rounds in formal shoes was not an easy task, nor was it was it easy to play volleyball in kurta pyjama. It was even more difficult to play football in a blazer, that too in the summers and it was very tiring to play leg cricket in plated trousers. And the seniors were having a good time. It was the start of spring for them. Commanding a group of fresher’s they were sitting, watching the circus go on and the whole college was lined up on the play ground boundaries. Mannu was hurt. The new shoes had started biting him, but stopping or retiring was to be punished by an extra round so he never dared to do so.“Welcome to your new life. As you finish the order of your senior, line up in front of the mess.” An announcement, from some corner, was heard. And the same followed, almost mechanically. Queues were made. Again, separate for girls who were giggling and passing smiles at the boys. The mess was near hostel number 2. In strict discipline the evening snacks were offered. The seniors had occupied all the benches. Thus the show went on even in the mess. No interaction could follow among the fresher’s. Sipping tea and gulping the aloo pakoda all were asked to go back to respective rooms.“Hey...I’m Vipul. I’m from Delhi.” He was Mannu’s room partner.“Mannu... from Lucknow.” The letter V was following him. Mannu smiled and started unpacking the suitcase.“Did you come today?”Vipul asked Mannu while changing. He was in formals over bathroom slippers.“Ya...feeling very tired yaar...”“Hmmm..You must be. Take some rest. Catch you later buddy.”Vipul said and left the room. Mannu immediately checked the mobile phone. There were three missed calls from Pia. But all he could do was to wait for her to call again. Introducing himself in front of the seniors six to even fifteen times in an hour, Mannu’s face, his complete body and even his hanky had become a store house for sweat. The style of introduction was unique. The fresher’s had to say their name in English, their father’s name in Hindi. Walking on the ladder of English and Hindi, the first year tumbled on every step and each time one had to start from the beginning. Mannu as well as the other boys couldn’t figure out the real motive of this ‘introduction act’ from the faces of the seniors’ aka the real BOSSES of the college. One thing that Mannu could actually realize was that he was nothing except the five letter name. Repeating ‘Mannu’ times and times again, he doubted why and how did he exist for so long? Oh momma!!! He never wanted to be see-n-ear a senior.As a usual routine they had to be dressed in formals the whole day, lined up straight like the Qutub Minar even to fill their stomachs. One wouldn’t mind not wishing the faculties, but no fresher could escape the bosses without a ‘Good morning Boss’, ‘Good evening Boss’ or sometimes why not a ‘Go to hell Boss!!!’ Stand by their permission and leave by theirs. One had to kill his free will to survive. Mannu and similarly the other boys were missing home and on the way to the mess, home delicacies were eagerly remembered. Mrs. K had cooked biryani, but Channu had informed Mannu that she didn’t eat and even cried on the table. Mannu had become so busy that he could not talk to her, hours after the knowing that she cried. He knew the cause. He also knew the solution, but he was kept occupied in silly activities and mobile phone was to kept back at the room. Missed calss from Pia had become more frequent. The melodrama ended by late night which left no scope to call back either at home or to Pia. Mannu had to sleep with guilt. Life had shown its second phase. Everything here was dipped in the lake of change.The two seat, two almirah and two tabled room number 510 was his new hideout. God had had some petty on him as Vipul, was also from the same branch, Electronics and Communication. Vipul, had a flat long nose and only his French style beard could support it. They both had same music interests, literary interests and they were even of the same height. Sitting in the corridor, they listened to only one song, but for hours. The whole corridor was mostly filled by the ECians. Mannu was named Slash by everyone for his guitar playing.Evenings passed but Mannu found few minutes, without forget, to talk at home. They were concerned about the meals, the health and safety of Mannu. They were missing him more than he was missing them. Only Mannu knew the pain he had buried in his heart. But there was the brighter side of life. Pia was much happier of his being in Jaipur. Now Mannu had no fear of mummy and her daily questions ‘Kiska phone tha?’, but the time to talk was unavailable.The lectures had begun after a formal introduction. The class had a strength of 60 with seven girls only. Tea had replaced the morning cup of milk. Hurriedly every guy from the hostel ran towards the classes to seat himself next to the future female engineers. On the first day itself boys had come out with a special theory on communication. They believed that how could they study topics on communication if they had no one to speak, no one to communicate? The main focus was on the practical application of theory. Every young impatient heart had only one thought in his head and on his lips.“Bhai!!!ye wali mast hai!!!, Brother, this girl is awesome!!!”The very next moment, thoughts changed.“Bha!!!.ye wali bhi mast hai!!!, Brother, this girl is also awesome!!!”
This continued the whole day long. It was the third day and long term relations were set for half of the class. Anticipation of love had made the boys punctual and smartly dressed. Mannu dreamed of Pia in every girl that he looked and sometimes in every girl he gazed. On the academic front terminologies had evolved. Periods were now lectures. Mathematics was now engineering mathematics. The grading system was such that no one failed. Strange, isn’t it? They just secured ‘backs’. Maybe, ‘backs’ didn’t hurt the conscience of the students. Vipul, Shubh and several other boys had started casual interaction with the girls during lecture breaks. A few from the rural background were busy among themselves. Being non proficient in English, they preferred to have a whole boys group. Mannu’s interaction with the girls was also limited as he used the breaks to reply to the long messages to Pia, who had brought a new number for herself. She had risked her mother’s passport to get a new sim card. As and when her mother was out she replaced the sim card, called or messaged Mannu and again put things back to safety. A confirmation call from the operator had been missed and it had created some confusion in her house. Pia’s mother picked up the call and refused to confirm the details. But luckily the sim card was made operational. The long day ended with introductory lectures. The evening was again set for the circus. It had to continue for a month as told by Vipul who had some senior’s as school mates. As a consequence he was now being saved of mockery. Instead he sat among the seniors and watched his colleagues perform the absurd show. This created some ill feelings among most of the boys. Vipul was seen as an outsider. He seemed to be one among the bosses. Also, he only came to sleep at the room and rest of the time he was busy outside the hostel either at the canteen, where the fresher’s were not allowed to enter yet or in the gym where again the entry for fresher’s was barred.
With exception of a
few all the hostellers were now buddies.
The corridors and the rooms were always filled with howling and growling
of the young, restless boys. To attend Pia’s call Mannu had to sit in the
bathroom. Calls from home were attended only for a short duration, just to
inform Mrs. K that the meals were taken on time, that he had woke up on time
and he was bathing daily.
Apart from the music and chatter,
enthusiastically the fresher’s discussed and worked on Physics. The management
in the rooms had gone berserk. Things lay all scattered and the focus was to
complete the assignments and get up on time. After a hectic week a two day holiday was
granted to the fresher’s. Nitesh and
Bijoy had become good friends with Mannu and they three spent most of the time
in 510. The assignments were divided
among three, Physics for Mannu, Mathematics for Nitesh and Chemistry for Bijoy.
This division of labour help them gain some sleep at night.
The long awaited
weekend had finally come and the whole hostel was asleep till 11. Breakfast was
missed and homemade laddoos, salted wafers,
biscuits helped Mannu kill the hunger till lunch. But the dullness in the lunch
and dinner had started building up. Only the evening snack was a reprieve but
it was served only once. Hiding faces, even changing T shirts to go
unrecognized in the queue didn’t help. The mess workers were adept at stopping
this theft. Mannu had started playing cricket and very soon he was inducted in
the team of Ssenior’s, just as an extra, but it was an honour.
Going by the busy
schedule Mannu’s lifestyle had found a new dimension. Calls were frequently
missed. Even the tone of his voice rose if Mrs. K enquired much about the day’s
happenings. He wanted to find some time for himself, but it was unavailable.
College was to be attended with sincerity, so intense that the fresher’s had
been barred to bring mobile phones to classes. Back at the room personal space
was completely absent. Some one or the other was always present with Vipul,
mostly a senior, and this again restricted Mannu’s space and time for himself. He
felt irritated, but what could be done except making efforts to adjust oneself
in the new situation. Most of the boys cared not to call back home even for
weeks, but Mannu was a daily caller which compounded his problem. The new sim
card that Pia had brought helped, but only a bit. Her messages were read by
Mannu hours after they were delivered and his messages were read by her only
when her mother was busy in the kitchen or with the TV, for it demanded a high
risk on Pia’s part in inserting the sim, reading and replying to Mannu’s
messages and replacing the sim with the original. It needed at least five to
ten minutes and her mother’s business. Also it needed that no one call her
mother during those quick minutes because a switch off message would again send
a doubt. On her demand for a new phone,
she was told that it would come as a gift if she tops the final exams. Pia was
sure that day was never to come. She had also adjusted.
Mannu’s lectures
took pace for a while and again there was lull as and when the date of the Fresher
Party was announced. The lecturers started giving tips on the importance of
maintaining decorum that night and motivated the students to bring out the best
within them. The Head Of Department was called for a special lecture. After the
class was over Mr. Neeraj who taught Mathematics glorified her lecture. He
considered the class lucky that the HoD had visited them and moreover asked
their names one by one.
“What a lucky
batch...”He said and left.
And in full swing
the preparation for the fresher party began. The fresher’s itself were made to
do the decoration, paint the walls with graffiti and make invitations. This
really brought out the best within them! The toil was doubled. Attending the
lectures and after the college hours the first year were to decorate the
campus! It was exciting as the girls were also involved. Refreshments were
served from time to time and there was no stop on interaction. Not even on one
to one interaction of a boy and a girl. Here too the seniors tried to take
space. In the disguise of introduction they spent hours with the girls and the
first year boys after a long wait made way back to the decoration. One had to
be really quick to grab the opportunity. Mannu was feeling composed because he
did not consider himself as a party in the race. He felt that commitment to Pia
gave him a sense of satisfaction and calmness.
The hunt for Mr.,
Ms. Fresher had started. Even before the auditions, the final names seemed very
likely. Gargi, a girl from Himachal, had become close to a senior from
Mechanical Branch. He was the head of the organizing committee. The say in the
campus was that she had already won the contest. In the mess and the hostels,
boys were busy criticizing the seniors for their monopoly. The criticism was
not directed on the tentative outcome of the contest, the boys would be glad if
she won, but they were disheartened because their chance to approach Gargi was
nullified. Among the boys Vipul had
registered his name for the contest. Mannu was willing to contest it too, but
the organizing committee permitted only one event per person. He preferred to
register in a solo guitar performance. Nitesh was a contestant for Mr. Fresher.
This closeness of Mannu and Nitesh had lead to a recent turf between Vipul and
Mannu. Vipul was feeling uneasy about Nitesh’s frequent visits to room 510. He
feared that Mannu would reveal minutes of his performance to Nitesh. Vipul
didn’t talk much directly, but got the message conveyed through a senior. It
came like a warning to Mannu. Courageously, Mannu ignored it. Meanwhile Nitesh
had given a good list of songs that Mannu could play on the night. He had asked
the girls of his branch and they had asked others about their choice and
finally a pop song medley was decided. A guitar was arranged. Room number 510
became a hotspot after dinner. The medley was forcefully side lined and Mannu
had to attend requests from the boys. The favourites were songs from the band
Jal, Band of boys. Rock was not so popular, but Mannu inserted a melody in
between to give the boys a taste of rock. The lights were closed usually after
three and the morning started by eight. Mannu had promised Pia to e-mail her a
recording, but he couldn’t find time, sometimes a vacant seat, to access the
net lab.
A week passed and yet
again it was clear that Mannu was unable to devote more time either to talk at
home or to Pia. He was in a helpless situation and her mother and Pia
understood that pretty well. Mannu messages were mostly filled with ‘sorry’ or
‘please’ and his talks were mostly confined at asking some other time to call
up at home. A Saturday was decided for the fresher party. The dress code was
notified in the hostels and the common room. It read,
Boys-White shirt,
Red pocket square, Ash colour waist coat and plated trouser.
Girls-Red Saree with
Black brocade
Wasn’t this sort of
notification bound to create a ruckus in the hostels? Surely it was! Except
those from affluent families no one had this particular combination ready to
wear. The seniors were requested to rent theirs but as a tradition it was to be
handed only after the fresher party. Till the Saturday night, getting so
informal in relation was not seen rich enough for the hierarchy. As a favour
the college buses were made to pick and drop the young shopper’s to and from
the market place.
It was but exciting
as it was the first trip to the Jaipur city. The buses were again commanded by
a senior who informed Mannu and others that after fresher’s things would
change, that the seniors would be like elder brothers to the boys. He didn’t
mention his relationship with the girls. Gargi sat next to him. The head of the
organizing committee had ensured that she finds a comfortable place in the bus.
The senior was sent as an escort to her and the other juniors.
“What’s there in a
day? Why can’t we be like brothers from now on? ”A guy, thin and lean with a
very fair complexion asked the senior. The senior smiled and asked the fair boy
to repeat the question. And he asked him to do so several times until he
pleaded for an apology. The question went unanswered. All the heads and minds
those was directed towards the conversation turned abruptly and busied
themselves with the outside view. Mannu
opened the window panes to feel the free wind. It was the same route,
surrounded by mountains. Some untimed rains had led to the growth of distant
green patches on the rocky Aravallis. Again they crossed the Amber palace. It was crowded as usual
and this led to a jam. The flower seller came inside the bus to make a
purchase.
“Phool...Phool..5 rupee ka rose
hai..bas 5 rupee ka...” he
repeated as he went on to the seats where a boy and a girl sat together. Their
eyes were fixed upon the beauty of the roses, but purchasing it was a
farfetched option . Hearts had not grown fond enough to exchange roses. The
titillation, shyness and the rush of blood was clearly visible in their eyes.
Some were ashamed on the prospect of considering a love relation with the seat
mate. They rudely threw a NO to the seller. Mannu was smiling. He felt it easy
to be saved from this moment of expression. Inside he became nervous when he
imagined Pia in front and a rose in his hand. The bus moved with a jerk and
that brought him back to reality. The city was warm, but colourful. The hotels
that passed through were designed as palaces. Even the names were palatial. The
streets were broader compared to Lucknow and much better organized. The street
side market was restricted to some areas. Only food stalls took the space
during rush hours. The bus crossed Jal
Mahal. Mannu was in dreams. He started imagining a walk with Pia with a
coffee in their hands. The lake had got some water and the hovering mountain
had given birth to some greenery. The beauty of the monument offered romance.
Soon the bus reached
the city area as was visible by rows of pink painted shops. Truly is the name
pink city! The markets were divided and named accordingly. After passing
through several traffic jams and waiting for the cows, after every few metres,
to stand and find space away from thedriving lane, the bus halted at chaura rasta. There were temples and
food shops all around. Aroma of incense sticks filled the minds of the walkers.
Mannu felt an essence of Pia on the streets. They seemed familiar to him.
“On the left you can
buy stationary and on the right there are clothing shops. Boys have to get a
hair cut also. Find some decent barber.” Came the voice of the senior. For the
time being the first year were left alone. He went on with Gargi. No other girl
was allowed.
“Phew...Such a confusing
place. Where has he brought us?”Nitesh spoke to the group.
“Let’s keep walking.
First let’s have something to eat.”replied Shubh and they found a stall of pav bhaji. It was delicious. Three girls
also accompanied them and the round of introduction continued while relishing
the dish. Shubh took the lead and they all went to a handloom store. The size
and the price were clearly mentioned on all the clothes, price being the major
factor for consideration. The girls went upstairs for the purchase. Shubh accompanied
them. He was making the best use of the opportunity. The products were on
discount and a bulk purchase came soft on the pockets. Mannu had paid a few
hundred for Nitesh. He paid for a kulfi.
Nearby, the grooming of the boys was also done. There too they got a group
discount added upon a student discount. The shopping was done and all were
asked to wait in the bus. Gargi came with the senior. She had several bags of
famed brands in her hand. The other girls were looking at theirs and pretending
not to be jealous. While waiting for others to get groomed Mannu had purchased
a handmade diary for Pia. She had given the news to Mannu that her family was
palnning to visit the city next month to celebrate Diwali. Mannu was very
anxious about the trip but he had to absorb the happiness within himself. There
had not been any talk between them to discuss about the trip. The new life and
its rustle had absorbed Mannu’s conscience.
The stage was set.
Music was loud. One had to be very close to let the other listen. Boys made
good use of it. Girls too didn’t leave the opportunity. All over the place
people were talking with their necks half bent towards other’s ear. Soft kisses
came easy. The fresher party had begun. Group photographs were being taken. The
walk to the ground had to be done in stops. The fragrance of perfumes mixed
together made the evening pleasant, romantic and naughty. Greetings were
exchanged through shake hands, hugs and soft kisses. Stalls were full of
customers. It seemed the play ground was a completely different place. There
was no restriction. The show started on time. Some seniors were caught on the
gates and had been fined for being drunk. It created some embarrassment for the
organizing committee, but the students didn’t mind it as the chief guest, a
folk artist of Rajasthan, had not yet arrived. The matter was put to end soon.
And the show started
with a usual Ganesh vandana.,
followed by a sufi concert. There was loud hooting from the back seats and the
air was full of energy and groove. The senior faculty, including the Director
were on their feet after the performance. The members of the organizing
committee were praising each other, exchanging high fives and their faculty coordinator
had promised them a retreat in the coming week. The talent round for Mr. And
Ms. Fresher began. Hooting was as loud as it could be. Gargi and Vipul were
cheered like no other. Mannnu was informed that his performance was to come
after the final round. Nervousness over topped him and he found a seat
backstage with his guitar to give a final touch to his preparation. The swing
of the hoot made him anxious. Expectations were high and so was the blame. A
senior came near him, wished him all luck, shook hands, asked his name and room
number and left. He was totally confused, the focus was lost and the hooting
made it difficult to regain it. Nitesh was on stage with Vipul. It was the
question-answer round, also the last for the competition. Nitesh was looking dynamic in appearance and
so was Vipul. Questions came one after another and the answers had to follow
within ten seconds. There was silence, still one corner preferred to be noisy
when Nitesh spoke. They were supporters of Vipul. Mannu and others from hostel
number 2 did the same when Vipul spoke. Both were competitive. Their replies
were equally good. In the girls round Gargi cleared seemed the winner as Neha
had done many mistakes. Mistakes which were visible! Gargi was flamboyant in
appearance, swuft in tackling the questions. To a question about her vision for
the College Neha gave a bookish reply which went un noticed. Gargi replied that
the new batch was the vision. It was respected, applauded and the result was
fairly evident.
The rounds completed
and Mannu’s name was announced. Sweat as usual rolled his forehead. His fingers
and palms were shaking. Nervousness crept in. If he missed a chord he knew that
criticism would be carried for the next minute and till the end of the
performance. He gulped some lukewarm water, washed his face hurriedly, sat on
his palms for a few seconds to control the shivering, but it was
uncontrollable. What had to go was now a matter of time and chance.
“Ladies and
gentlemen, guys and girls...presenting
before you the first solo performance of the day by Mannu. A big round of
applause for the young boy...” The announcement was made. Backstage some
seniors assisted him in getting on stage and handling him the guitar and a
glass of water. Lights flashed and the stage was set for Mannu to show his
talent. Waving to the crowd he walked near the mike. The response was not
visible in the flash. It came as a jolt to him. Nothing except some blur and
huge sound surrounded him.
“Hi
everybody...”Mannu spoke. His voice choked. So he spoke again.
“Hi everybody...can
you hear me?”He spoke aloud and played a chord. The cheer resonated through his
ears. This gave him some confidence.
“I’m here to perform
a medley of Bollywood. Just take your seats...hold a drink and feel the
music.”Well these words were coming from within. He didn’t know what he was
saying. He was a different personality, but confident than usual. And he began
his performance after a sound check with chords and a solo of Slash. Beginning with Aadat from the band jal, he picked upon a self composed song teri yaad and ended with a
hindi version of bob Dylan’s Blowing in the Wind. Twice he missed the chords,
but it didn’t go so loud. He choked, but amusingly he managed himself later.
What next? He had set the mood for the party. Claps and claps were heard all
around. Raising his guitar high and straight he waved a hello and jumped from the front. It was a bave act as the senior
faculty and the guests were sitting just in front. He immediately bowed down,
offered a salaam and the old,
wrinkled faces were covered with a smile. Mannu had become famous in four
minutes. Backstage several girls came in to know his name and branch. Shubh
stood beside him. A few seniors also congratulated him for his talent and
assured him that if he has any problem he may approach them directly. This
performance came as a boon as a 4th year senior came along and
announced backstage that Mannu be spared of any file making from that evening
itself. A girl leaned upon him in pretence of slipping due to high heels. Gargi
also came to ask him about her performance. What was happening? The night would
be so gifted was unexpected. The nervousness was laid to rest with the coffee.
Shivering had given way to firm shake hands and Mannu was able to enjoy the performances
from that moment. As was predicted Gargi won the Ms. Fresher award. Nitesh
lost. Shubh had performed a mimicry act and he was called for a special chat
with the folk artist. It seemed a new phase of life would begin again. Back to
the rooms, exhausted, Mannu could find no space to sleep as vipul was being
congratulated by the seniors. Drinks were served in room 510 and he was the
hero of the hostels and among the seniors. Mannu was only spared of the file
work. Nitesh, upset with the results, had locked the room. After several
warnings and knocking he finally opened it up for Mannu and Shubh.
“He knew the
questions beforehand.”Nitesh repeated, lost in a vague thought. Mannu sat
silent. He didn’t want to make a comment.
“Mannu...you have to
find it out if you call me a friend.”
“Yes I
will...”replid a hesitant Mannu.
“No you have to yaar...My answers were better my
performance was better. You saw it.”
“Now it’s done yaar.You know you were better that’s it.
Don’t bother too much about being called better.”Shubha and Mannu repeated this
phrase to console Nitesh. Their talks went on when after hours Nitesh had a
smile on his face. At four in the morning they finally decided that it is time
o rest and there are still four years to prove one’s worth.
The mid term
examination was near, so was Diwali and Pia’s visit to Jaipur. A week’s holiday was taken by the fresher’s
extended by a bunk and this finally gave some personal time to Mannu to talk to
Pia. Talks extended for hours. So was the case with many boys who had found a
girl in the campus. Mannu and Pia planned about where they’ll meet, which
places they’ll go, how they’ll go? Unable to control her excitement Pia came a
out with silence or with love you.
The planning did not end there. Other night they discussed what outfits they
both will put on and the flavour of ice cream they’ll lick and even the size of
the Coke they’ll order. Medium was her say and the quantity was single without
any doubt. Mannu just listened to her and silently prayed to God for giving him
such a wonderful life silvered by Pia’s innocent love. He sang songs for her, the same which he had
performed on the fresher’s night and even more. Some of her choice and some of
his favourites. Choices were mostly the same. They slept after a good night, a
kiss rather many kisses and a happy thought that they were one more day closer
to meet, to see each other. One strange
morning when Mannu wakes up, he gets to know that he would spend four long
years in her maternal city. AIEEE could have dropped him in any state, any
city, anywhere in this big good country. But he was in Jaipur. Even though Pia didn’t live there,
she visited the city twice or thrice a year. And so was it. They were meeting
the next month. What was it, destiny or luck? They both wondered.
Very nice...
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