What did I expect?What everyone expects?
Of course getting listed in the final list of the prestigious Civil Services in the first attempt. But the journey for me was not to short.
It was my first attempt at Prelims in May 2012, just two days after the end of college. I was striving hard from the past 7 months! Learning to keep a balance between the college studies and preparation for Civil Services. Taking class notes, Saving time, staying up till late night and waking up early in the morning to mug up articles of Constitution, revise maps and other limited study material that I had. I was in a completely new avatar; out from my love of watching movies of Al pacino, again and again or writing fiction or promoting my debut novel after its release in February, 2012. I had sincerely adopted the change, put my fascination to write fiction at stake. Priority was to attend classes for General studies and Geography(Optional) which were over by March and revise the notes and finally clear the Prelims.
The attempt was a meager one. CSAT, I thought would come to my rescue. Even in general studies I had performed well compared to all others in my group who attempted the exam from my college(Jaipur Engineering College, Jaipur). I ran out of the exam center in a fury. I enjoyed that evening. Had a fun time at Mcdonalds. I gave myself a party on working hard throughout these months and attempting the paper well.
After a break of 10 to 12 days preparation for the mains had begun. But a new reality was showing its face. I had purchased the past year question paper set and was trying to answer them and I was struggling a lot in comprehending the questions of General Studies. They seemed not difficult, but completely new. I didn't had the requisite information to put in through 300 words. I didn't had even 100 concrete words! What was I doing from the past one year? How had I took things so lightly? What quality of study material had took my days and nights?
And even the prelims results had some other story to tell. I failed by a reasonable margin. It struck me awfully! I was unable to figure out how could my marks be so low when I had studied several books for each subject, had made hand written notes as well as memorized my coaching notes word by word, tried not to miss any class of general studies. What is beyond this that is needed to clear the exam? But no answer was to be found.
The wait and the search to get the right material, right guidance continued. The second optional was still undecided. My first optional, Geography, had been completed in coaching classes which I had to miss several times due to practicals, attendance issues and college assignments. Then I took on to mathematics. Went through the syllabus, purchased some books only to return them after a few days. Mathematics had been my fear throughout the school life. I wondered if I would clear the exam with Mathematics as optional it would be a big win over my childhood fear. But thankfully, very soon I realized that clearing the exam is not about satisfying the hunger of your ego. Decisions cannot be made this way!
Search for the second optional continued and then I decided to take up Sociology as it was suggested by aspirants at the chai shop and near book stores that "it is a small subject and very easy to score."(which is not really the case.) In innocence I believed their words as the introduction they gave about themselves was that,
"I gave Mains in XYZ year with Sociology and scored XYZ marks.Scored low in interview." I considered it to be true reasonably. But was it really true that they had cleared even prelims is not sure and many of them, whose name I remember have still not made it to the final list. But I got the syllabus of the subject and I could comprehend it. I joined classes at RAU's (Jaipur Branch). I focused all my attention to study the optional(Sociology) after prelims. The classes continued for 3 months and after that I again lost track of what had to follow now. Sociology was again opened up, but not closed. Only the classes were over. I made many friends in the classes, but none who had cleared prelims or any other stage of the exam. All were looking for someone ahead of them in the journey. A study of the optional subject(Sociology) continued and my other optional(Geography) took a backseat. Six months passed in a flash. Prelims came again in May 2013. Now the pattern of mains exam had changed. Only one optional was to be opted. The money and effort in studying Geography came to a total waste as I decided to go for Sociology. It was fresh in my mind. Self introspecting myself after the test series that I attempted in my room, I thought that this time I was better prepared. I had read some new books as suggested by the coaching teachers.
The attempt was good, ahead of being meager. Again I started preparing myself for Mains 2013. The introduction of the ethics paper took a month's time and I was abreast with the complete syllabus of the subject. Hopes to attempt mains were very high this time. Result came on August 2, 2013. I had memorized the roll number. A friend from the coaching called and asked my, without a hi or hello, "Kya raha prelims ka result?" I was numb to know the fact that result is out. In a hurry I switched on the internet, but was unable to open it up due to slow speed. Tension was rising up. I went to my neighbor in the PG I used to live. The pdf file was downloaded in a click. He was a working guy. I searched my roll number. Mmmm..Mmmm..No. Nowhere it was! I went back to my room, brought the Hall ticket to his room and checked again but my roll number was not in the list. Again, I failed.
I didn't had the courage to call up my parents and tell them that I would take another year. The next morning I was asked to come back home, as early as I can, to take a break and then decide what had to be done now. I had two options. One was to go for the placement offer by Infosys which was to come by November 2013 and the other was...Attempt the Civil Service Exam again in 2014! At this point home came to my rescue, yet again. The belief of my parents came as a light and they were in favor that I should continue to prepare for the next attempt. Analyse my approach, find my weakness and work towards them and things would surely be fine. 3rd is always the best one, my dad told me.
I made a list of my WEAKNESSES, which included,
1)Absence of quality and authentic study material.
2)Unstructured preparation in terms of improper comprehensive planning.
3)Complete dependence on coaching institute.
4)Attempting very few practice sets.
5)Attempting limited number of questions in prelims(around 60 questions in GS paper)
6)Giving more than required time to The Hindu.
7)Researching on the Optional time and time again(SOCIOLOGY).
Then I brought 3 significant changes in my preparation.
1)Connect myself with previous year toppers through Facebook(Although at first I didn't believe that it would work. It was the reason I had not contacted them in my previous attempts. But it did!)
2)Joined test series for Mains (Vision IAS) and prelims(Career Launcher).
3)Recast the study material(as suggested by toppers and module given by Vision IAS).
I started the preparation in an aligned way. I even changed my room and the complete atmosphere around me. The fresh beginning brought new hopes. With planned efforts for the tests and analyzing my weaknesses I came out more prepared.
In a polite message I had refused the offer by Infosys. Now I was on my own with nothing to cling upon. I had cleared the SSC CGL in 2013, the prelims of Rajasthan Administrative Services in 2013, but both the exams were cancelled and results withheld. I had only one ray of hope for my career.
I attempted the prelims again in 2014 after attempting around 25 mock tests.
Of course getting listed in the final list of the prestigious Civil Services in the first attempt. But the journey for me was not to short.
It was my first attempt at Prelims in May 2012, just two days after the end of college. I was striving hard from the past 7 months! Learning to keep a balance between the college studies and preparation for Civil Services. Taking class notes, Saving time, staying up till late night and waking up early in the morning to mug up articles of Constitution, revise maps and other limited study material that I had. I was in a completely new avatar; out from my love of watching movies of Al pacino, again and again or writing fiction or promoting my debut novel after its release in February, 2012. I had sincerely adopted the change, put my fascination to write fiction at stake. Priority was to attend classes for General studies and Geography(Optional) which were over by March and revise the notes and finally clear the Prelims.
The attempt was a meager one. CSAT, I thought would come to my rescue. Even in general studies I had performed well compared to all others in my group who attempted the exam from my college(Jaipur Engineering College, Jaipur). I ran out of the exam center in a fury. I enjoyed that evening. Had a fun time at Mcdonalds. I gave myself a party on working hard throughout these months and attempting the paper well.
After a break of 10 to 12 days preparation for the mains had begun. But a new reality was showing its face. I had purchased the past year question paper set and was trying to answer them and I was struggling a lot in comprehending the questions of General Studies. They seemed not difficult, but completely new. I didn't had the requisite information to put in through 300 words. I didn't had even 100 concrete words! What was I doing from the past one year? How had I took things so lightly? What quality of study material had took my days and nights?
And even the prelims results had some other story to tell. I failed by a reasonable margin. It struck me awfully! I was unable to figure out how could my marks be so low when I had studied several books for each subject, had made hand written notes as well as memorized my coaching notes word by word, tried not to miss any class of general studies. What is beyond this that is needed to clear the exam? But no answer was to be found.
The wait and the search to get the right material, right guidance continued. The second optional was still undecided. My first optional, Geography, had been completed in coaching classes which I had to miss several times due to practicals, attendance issues and college assignments. Then I took on to mathematics. Went through the syllabus, purchased some books only to return them after a few days. Mathematics had been my fear throughout the school life. I wondered if I would clear the exam with Mathematics as optional it would be a big win over my childhood fear. But thankfully, very soon I realized that clearing the exam is not about satisfying the hunger of your ego. Decisions cannot be made this way!
Search for the second optional continued and then I decided to take up Sociology as it was suggested by aspirants at the chai shop and near book stores that "it is a small subject and very easy to score."(which is not really the case.) In innocence I believed their words as the introduction they gave about themselves was that,
"I gave Mains in XYZ year with Sociology and scored XYZ marks.Scored low in interview." I considered it to be true reasonably. But was it really true that they had cleared even prelims is not sure and many of them, whose name I remember have still not made it to the final list. But I got the syllabus of the subject and I could comprehend it. I joined classes at RAU's (Jaipur Branch). I focused all my attention to study the optional(Sociology) after prelims. The classes continued for 3 months and after that I again lost track of what had to follow now. Sociology was again opened up, but not closed. Only the classes were over. I made many friends in the classes, but none who had cleared prelims or any other stage of the exam. All were looking for someone ahead of them in the journey. A study of the optional subject(Sociology) continued and my other optional(Geography) took a backseat. Six months passed in a flash. Prelims came again in May 2013. Now the pattern of mains exam had changed. Only one optional was to be opted. The money and effort in studying Geography came to a total waste as I decided to go for Sociology. It was fresh in my mind. Self introspecting myself after the test series that I attempted in my room, I thought that this time I was better prepared. I had read some new books as suggested by the coaching teachers.
The attempt was good, ahead of being meager. Again I started preparing myself for Mains 2013. The introduction of the ethics paper took a month's time and I was abreast with the complete syllabus of the subject. Hopes to attempt mains were very high this time. Result came on August 2, 2013. I had memorized the roll number. A friend from the coaching called and asked my, without a hi or hello, "Kya raha prelims ka result?" I was numb to know the fact that result is out. In a hurry I switched on the internet, but was unable to open it up due to slow speed. Tension was rising up. I went to my neighbor in the PG I used to live. The pdf file was downloaded in a click. He was a working guy. I searched my roll number. Mmmm..Mmmm..No. Nowhere it was! I went back to my room, brought the Hall ticket to his room and checked again but my roll number was not in the list. Again, I failed.
I didn't had the courage to call up my parents and tell them that I would take another year. The next morning I was asked to come back home, as early as I can, to take a break and then decide what had to be done now. I had two options. One was to go for the placement offer by Infosys which was to come by November 2013 and the other was...Attempt the Civil Service Exam again in 2014! At this point home came to my rescue, yet again. The belief of my parents came as a light and they were in favor that I should continue to prepare for the next attempt. Analyse my approach, find my weakness and work towards them and things would surely be fine. 3rd is always the best one, my dad told me.
I made a list of my WEAKNESSES, which included,
1)Absence of quality and authentic study material.
2)Unstructured preparation in terms of improper comprehensive planning.
3)Complete dependence on coaching institute.
4)Attempting very few practice sets.
5)Attempting limited number of questions in prelims(around 60 questions in GS paper)
6)Giving more than required time to The Hindu.
7)Researching on the Optional time and time again(SOCIOLOGY).
Then I brought 3 significant changes in my preparation.
1)Connect myself with previous year toppers through Facebook(Although at first I didn't believe that it would work. It was the reason I had not contacted them in my previous attempts. But it did!)
2)Joined test series for Mains (Vision IAS) and prelims(Career Launcher).
3)Recast the study material(as suggested by toppers and module given by Vision IAS).
I started the preparation in an aligned way. I even changed my room and the complete atmosphere around me. The fresh beginning brought new hopes. With planned efforts for the tests and analyzing my weaknesses I came out more prepared.
In a polite message I had refused the offer by Infosys. Now I was on my own with nothing to cling upon. I had cleared the SSC CGL in 2013, the prelims of Rajasthan Administrative Services in 2013, but both the exams were cancelled and results withheld. I had only one ray of hope for my career.
I attempted the prelims again in 2014 after attempting around 25 mock tests.
The result arrived. I was at the tea shop, where I spent the whole day studying, and my phone beeped up with a message from Career launcher congratulating me for clearing the Prelims exams. Whooooo aaaaa!!!! Whoooo aaaaa!!! There I was, on top of the world now. Finally I had done it. The biggest stumble had left my way. The road forward was open. Still the journey was not over.
I geared myself for Mains. Fearful it sounded, but I had a belief that I can write well. I can sharpen myself more, I can do it to the best of my ability. With rigorous preparation I went on to attempt the Mains in 2014 finally after two failed attempts in prelims.
I cleared it in one GO!Whooo aaaa!!!Seemed like the biggest victory in life.
I was called for the Personality Test on 8th May 2015. The final result was announced on 4th July 2015.
I cleared it too in one GO!Whooo aaaa!!!
I found my name at rank 693. It wasn't a dream anymore. Yes it wasn't. From an average guy passing class 12th from a government school, graduating from a private engineering college, with ordinary academic credentials, I went on to be among the qualifiers of one of the most toughest exams of the world.
And this is what my journey has to say: If I can do it, anybody can do it.
Through this series I wish to be an aide, to all those who wish to do it, who dream to qualify the Civil Service exam.
All the best. May your dreams find their horizon!
Hats off sir
ReplyDeleteNice sir, and also thanks for sharing and your blog give me a enthuse me to attend civil service 2017..but sir i need a little guidance can u help me.
ReplyDelete